Half of the police budget in this city is allocated to drive up and down brown neighborhoods.

this is why it's so important to thank big accounts for their service when they reshare a lowbie's post

Remarkable document: hundreds of European politicians are calling to mobilize European resources to protect the Sumud aid flotilla as it faces escalating attacks on its way to Gaza. In other words: European politicians are trying to protect humanitarian volunteers *from Israel.*

time to relax by making a movie in the iMovie app

Why do iPhones have the iMovie app? Here let me pull up my phone and make a movie rn

Cashier asked me if I wanted to use store points for my purchase today and I said “sure why not, I could die today” and she stared at me in horror I need to be old yeller’d man…

hey weird news, i got raptured but there's been some sort of mistake and i ended up in what is called "canadian heaven"

Not sure why this is so blurry?

I have been thinking of all of the ways that I can become more powerful

The woke left? Without saying goodbye?!

every time the phd homie posts

(classified ad 'seeking radwife'): i am: - loving - good provider - in shape you will: - give me bone cancer with prolonged exposure

Oh!

Lol

they are making things up that have never been made up before

the funniest part is the “yeah” - they just don’t give a fuck

fbi: don't make fun of charlie kirk or we will prosecute you also fbi: charlie kirk stopped the bullet because of his big fat neck. his neck was big and thick like that of a moose. the neck meat was stronger than steel itself. it was like a tree stump connecting his head to his shoulders

What I most enjoy about the John Wick series is that here is a guy that doesn’t want to be doing any of this, he doesn’t enjoy any of it. He is a guy that just wants to sit at home and hang out with his dog and think about his wife.

Random run sunsets are the best

whenever I see a girl with 300 stickers on her car that say don’t honk at me I am neurodivergent I literally run the opposite way

Twinnnnsssss

The fun thing about doing photography on the side is that if you’re really nice to people they just send you contracts your way. All I did was show up on time and smiled a lot.

every poster whose skeets get read in court should be required to have a username that is this funny, at bare minimum

Pope Leo in homily at St. Anne Church in Vatican City: “Whoever seeks justice, turns wealth into a common good, but whoever seeks domination turns the common good into the prey of their own greed." www.vaticannews.va/en/pope/news...

Waking up from a 15-year magical coma after eating an ensorcelled croissant intended for the princess: ahh man, I needed that

My favorite part of World War Z is when I****l gets lit the fuck up. Holy shit, if only.

Out

getting into #baseball, anybody have any seasons they recommend?

A little light reading.

During the Great Protein Bar War (1901) they were making people eat those Gatorade blue raz bars

My respect for anyone who says they're afraid of voting against this resolution is zero. You are a member of Congress. The country is being dragged to hell. 'People will threaten us.' What did you think this job entailed? Quit blubbering, vote no, and move on.

Nation that creates and profits from addicts complains that there are simply “too many of them on the streets” ‼️

Immigration Judge Orders Mahmoud Khalil to Be Deported to Syria or Algeria The Palestinian activist's lawyers say he remains protected for now by a federal judge's previous order preventing his removal while his case proceeds, writes @premthakker.bsky.social: zeteo.com/p/immigratio...

time to unwind tonight with a good book

personally I care way more about this than jimmy kimmel but hopefully people who care about kimmel realize how it’s connected to mahmoud

Fish love me and so do women :p

I really don’t care if Canada or China takes over the u.s someone has to do something right now please

It will all be alright soon

may I speak with the primary poster in your household?

Donald Trump announces they're "not even sure Epstein was a real guy"

i think how we got here is that the right's favorite move is working the ref and the radical centrist's favorite move is self flattery that they could never be worked

Reading some bluesky. Posts tonight

Penguin classics used to be dripped down ‼️

national humiliation, a self inflicted ignominy with no purpose

Mexican Labubu or whatever

Meeting with legislators this week to discuss climate campaign and I’m starting to feel nervous that I will accidentally tell them how much I hate them.

this is biggie and tupac for people whose rural hospital is about to close

not the office siren but I am the office problem 👍

the frustrating thing about thinking technology *should* be a way to improve our lives is that when someone invents a doodad that might help people in some minor way it's overshadowed by a dumbass finance guy confidently announcing everyone will be fired and unemployable if they don't buy the doodad