This business of businesses being closed on mondays when I have a toddler to entertain is really cramping my style

Every few months now I re-read this "Who Goes Nazi?" piece from 1941 and am blown away by how it captures the people we are dealing with 80 years later. harpers.org/archive/1941...

I heard someone say that bologna is just hot dog pancakes and that’s been fucking with me all day

Who else has been using Adobe Audition since it was still Cool Edit Pro? ✋

Don Jr. seeing the Epstein birthday letter

do you ever feel like the lone pikachu in the knockoff labubu claw machine of life

I wrote and told this joke before they changed the Cracker Barrel logo back, okay!??!

What the living fuck

charmless sociopaths in pursuit of mass engagement at impossible scale with zero ethical guardrails and no functional government oversight, what could go wrong

Who else was too poor for an iPod in 2004 and settled for a Creative Nomad Zen Xtra?

It's really unfair that I can't CLEP my way into a Doctorate in Beatles Studies.

Somewhere out there, there’s a version of “Heartbreaker” where Pat Benatar sings “Bootlicker,” and it feels right today.

“My farts are WAY LONGER and WAY LOUDER than loser Cryin’ Chuck Schumer!! Thank you for your attention to this matter!”

Who’s going to be the Charlie Chaplin for our present moment?

Like, if someone said “I bet you have tiny bowel movements,” he would NEED to say something about his big beautiful shits. He wouldn’t be able to help himself. Fascists cannot abide being made a fool of.

One thing we are not doing enough is very publicly trolling POTUS and baiting him into saying bizarre things. Doesn’t take much, we saw that at the debate with Harris last year. Just dig at one of his (many) insecurities and watch him reflexively stick his foot in his mouth.

In 20+ years I've never put a sticker on any of my guitars but I'm starting to consider it. www.redbubble.com/i/sticker/Wo...

Sounds like a Genesis album from the Peter Gabriel era

Holy shit we’re legitimately at “some cancer screenings are too woke.”

Somehow every interaction I have with the medical system feels like this.

The more my Meta Ray Bans app says TURN ON LOCATION SERVICES the more I’m like WHY DO YOU NEED TO KNOW

No, Batman does not appear in SUPERMAN and other lingering questions you may have about how James Gunn's DCU kick-off film sets up this new universe — all answered in my @gqmagazine.bsky.social latest. Spoiler alert, btw:

Giving me a label printer is like giving me the keys to a city. Probably shouldn't.

Gunn’s Superman is refreshing. Fun. Joyful. Heartfelt. It embraces what sets the character apart: he wants to do the right thing, just because it’s the right thing.

Superman fans, we are SO BACK!

I’m ready to believe again - The House of El is live from the red carpet at the #Superman World Premiere. #LookUp @dc.com @jamesgunn.bsky.social

oh hi mark

Remember, people; You don’t have to work tomorrow. Either because it’s Sunday and you don’t work Sunday, or you can tell your boss your swell friend Chris said you don’t have to work.

Unfair how he makes this look easy. www.youtube.com/watch?v=bVsx...

Every day I think “today is the day my app will be ready for friends to start testing" and every day I find another reason it's not ready

Cleveland! see you soon! Grab your tickets for an opening night screening of Superman on Friday, July 11. Join us at the capitolw65th for a special event featuring a post-screening podcast with Derek Russell from the @superhouseofel.bsky.social Afterparty! www.clevelandcinemas.com/movies/22966...

hey kid, wanna buy some precedented times?

hey kid, wanna buy some precedented times?

7 hours apart.

in America they have a 92 year old man named Willy and they won't let him stop working. t hey push him on stage and he cries and they don't care he has to sing all his songs before they let him go

No Kings includes Draft Kings

There are no kings in America except Gus Polinski, the Polka King of the Midwest.

The picture of the dog in the burning room saying “this is fine” but the dog itself is also on fire and running around and setting fire to every other dog and room in its vicinity.

Good morning to everyone EXCEPT the birthday boy

Those “I bought this BEFORE I knew Elon was crazy!” stickers don’t actually mention cars. You can put them on your furniture, appliances, pets, etc.

There are no kings in America except Gus Polinski, the Polka King of the Midwest.

Not me making a literal mixtape in 2025 with cassettes and vinyl. 👀

Half the fun of SwiftUI is the bizarre bugs.