Academics throw Latin and French phrases into their writing just so the ghost of Descartes has something to read.

There is probably more than one guy named Joe Lee in the city of Los Angeles. We could describe him as Angelino Joe Lee.

The MAGA movement would totally plant a left-leaning candidate only to absorb up the energy, money, and hopes of the voting public, only to then vote for Trump's agenda. But hey, the democratic party does that enough on its own with the likes of Kyrsten Sinema and John Fetterman.

Somebody commented that the tattoo guy in Maine is a MAGA plant, and while I don't think he is one, he is not demonstrating that he makes the best choices.

my woke take is that entirely too many people feel entitled to the benefits of a social contract while not feeling bound by the responsibilities of said contract

I have been trying to form a post-structuralist approach to condemning the tattoo. So far, I have only been driven into madness.

Bro you better not be up centering the periphery. Bro you better not be up emphasizing the maritime characteristics of regional pre-colonial economies. Bro you better not be up queering perspectives on imperial expansion. Bro you better not...

I like saying "have a good one" because depending on what the person is thinking, I could mean have a good evening, day, weekend, week, month, life, reincarnation, liberation from samsara, etc. I never know that I am going to see tomorrow, so I cover all the bases.

Every website needs to chill out trying to know my location or to get me to sign up to receive emails. I am trying to read about how the trauma of 9/11 inspired this crabcake recipe.

Let's not get in the habit of doing this too often. Too many horror plots start out this way.

There's never "enough" for these people.

David Cross folks.

APRIL - 1805 NAPOLEON IS MASTER OF EUROPE ONLY THE BRITISH FLEET STANDS BEFORE HIM THERE IS NOTHING IN NAVAL LAW STATING THAT A GOLDEN RETRIEVER CANNOT SERVE HIS MAJESTY AS CAPTAIN OCEANS ARE NOW BATTLEFIELDS

Really glad that HBO named their new Sunday night drama "Task" as if I didn't have enough of those on the weekend already

Social security is like the only "universal" program (universal for anyone retiring in their 60s, anyway) in the United States and it is so fundamentally popular that Republicans have been scared to even touch in the last 45 years of Reagan's presidency.

They're going to run her in 2028, aren't they

When you become a civil, sober politics knower like myself, you understand that by noticing a bad person is bad, you become even worse than them. And they become good

Sorry to get worked up about this, but we are on day three of commemorating and sensationalizing the death of a hateful troll.

Everyone, quiet down, CNN wants us to hear what the Nazi lady has to say.

The entire front page of CNN's website is dedicated to Charlie Kirk. Consent manufacturing machine going brrrrr

Alternatively, elites could be deliberately trying to crash the economy to further consolidate power and bring about full-scale techno-feudalism. Who's to say...

The reason that the decaying-tv-clown president often sets tariffs to "astronomically high" these days is because this is the plan to get rid of income tax. This way, next year, he can say, "look at how much money we made from tariffs, no need for income tax," right before the midterm election.

ME: team rocket will never steal these rare Pokémon! Not unless they wanna take on me and my fully evolved Miss Cigarettes! MISS CIGARETTES: miss cigarettes

Me when methods of imperial rule are used in the colonies: Haha fuck yeah!!! Yes!! Me when the methods of imperial rule are brought into the metropole: Well this fucking sucks. What the fuck.

Bro he better not ruin the 9/11 holiday.

I got an NYT push alert about Taylor Swift getting engaged, but not about the United States spying on Greenland

You know your late 30s are hitting when you enjoy the mouthfeel of your new fiber supplement powder in water.

Realizing that the thing missing from my life was Kamen Rider (1971)

Sam Altman: we think maybe if we fuel the machine god with blood, he will wake Theo Von: right Altman: Not sure how much blood. Maybe 1 billion people? I have to look at the math Von: yeah Altman: His unchained dreams lash out at us as radio static on the periphery of our minds. Give me money

Fellas, do you ever think about how fascism is imperialism turned back on the metropole?

I like that the only qualification for a prominent American media job is having rich parents.

i love that these guys went to quantico thinking they'd spend their careers hunting hannibal lecter or worst case scenario entrapping mentally ill muslim teens but instead they have to redact trumps name out of thousands of boxes of sex files and then walk a beat

Beyond awareness of its existence, I have a sneaking suspicion that prescription drug advertisements are there to let you know the "brand" name of the medication so that when you pay tremendously for it, you feel like you are getting the name-brand version rather than the generic.

"One more thing, it's not just a public bath, it's a..."

Oh I need to "rotate my tires" huh? Yeah no shit, pal. That's what driving is.

Computer, enhance.

"Some in the conspiracy community have already leapt at the notion that the beating of 'Big Balls' was a false flag operation."

Need to cheer myself up so here's the best Twitter post ever. It spawned one billion bad ripoffs but it's a beautiful magic trick. You don't just read it in his voice: he said it now. This quote is real.

All around me are familiar faces Worn out places, worn out faces

Arthur Schopenhauer delivering a eulogy: "She had so much lust for life, which as we all know is infantile." *Audience nods*

Titanium-y Daniel (the improved version of Steely Dan)

for Godzilla, every city is walkable

Francis Bacon would have 'proffitted auff that Epic Bacon même' for sure. He would have been an 'influéncier' on 'TheeTube' most certainly.

Scam Altman

Ever find yourself stuck in traffic and looking around at the soulless McMansions and strip malls and fall into existential despair not just because we’re cooking the planet, but because we’re cooking the planet for this?

Who up reading about hegemony

Becoming the most popular guy at the Tibetan throat singing concert because I brought lozenges.