All the pictures of the food from navy vessels today

Shorty straight-up nefarious with it

Thank you to our glorious pedo king for the blessing of $4 a gallon gas

Me and the boys are going to slip the surly bonds of Earth and dance the skies on laughter-silvered wings later if you wanna stop by

Somehow Albanian Eric Adams is both surprising and totally obvious

Happy Appomattox Day! Today should be a national holiday.

I remember trying to imitate his pitching style when I was a kid. What a fortuitous day of guy remembering I’ve had.

Always wonderful when you get to Remember Some Guys™️ I had the distinct pleasure of remembering Rocco Baldelli at work today

WIDENING GYRE CHAT: da_falcon: Has anyone seen f@lc0ner lately? I haven’t heard from him in a minute…. RoughBeast69: yooo!!! who up slouching towards bethlehem!?

@girlboss.capital fleeting @utopia.deferred jumpscare at the end of this video

It’s called “Good Friday“ because when people hear it’s time for Whiskey Friday with Tony Dokoupil they say “good!”

It be your own petard

When a homie likes my post it is manna from heaven to me

Nothing beside remains. Round the decay of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare

To the police officer working “security” at the grocery store sitting slack jaw and watching videos on your phone volume blasting with no headphones…thank you for your service sir 🫡

The pardoning of January 6ers may be the largest pardoning of pedophiles in American history

Staying at @georgialux.bsky.social palatial manse

Had work over the weekend and a coworker brought in leftover meatloaf to have for breakfast and a different coworker said “bro is loafed up on a Sunday morning“. I keep repeating it in my head “bro is loafed up on a Sunday morning“. It’s consuming me.

ooh girl shock me like an ugh jah feel

I said, "ooh, girl Shock me like an ugh jah feel Baby girl Turn me on with your ugh jah feel"

Sure AI is being used to make deepfake porn of high school kids but that is a small price to pay for it’s revolutionary ability to incorrectly summarize work emails you were never going to read

Went to the grocery store hungry, the fool’s errand

Now I have to figure out if anyone has hiked the WHOLE Appalachian trail.

This tournament is truly the sickos delight. Make sure you check out some games

Live from Operation Epstein Fury! It’s Whiskey Friday with Tony Dokupil!

Along with everything else in this article. Painting brick should be a crime.

The amount of rat feces contained in my posts is within the acceptable level set by the government

Disappointed in the turnout for this year’s Havana Syndrome Awareness 5k. It seems people these days just don’t care about this very real disease.

My friend, you would not tell with such high zest To children ardent for some desperate glory, The old Lie: Dulce et decorum est Pro pedophile mori

The only way to cure the male loneliness epidemic is to bring back trough urinals

Ha! You seriously think I’m going to just buy an empty can? Evaporated milk! Be serious

One of the indignities of this era is that I may have to live through the end of the world and it will be proceeded by someone posting “🚨BREAKING🚨”

Would be neat if someone ever suffered a consequence for being evil

Kelsey Miller, who works as a stylist at 13th and Washington salon, helped perfect Olympian Alysa Liu’s signature “halo” hairstyle.

The NYPD soiling themselves about a snowball or two reminded me of a similar incident with a different outcome in St. Louis. You don’t have to be a big wet bitch about everything

Prison guard sprinting to double kick Jeffery Epstein in the neck:

Album title and cover art in perfect harmony

Someone at the bar was talking about the movie “Get Him to the Greek” in the year 2026!?

A Claude-swarm of AI agents sucked me off

Call her a duck the way she’s only interested when I got that bread

Missionaries should not be allowed to bother people in the grocery store. I just want t buy tv dinners, cat food, and beer in peace! Leave me alone!

Bro the girls are manifesting your demise in the club

By the way this tasted as bad as you thought it would. Like feet and pink lemonade

Live from The Jeremy Piven Experience it’s Whiskey Friday with Tony Doukopil!

Getting mauled by what authorities will describe as “various beasts and creatures“ while I walk home from buying beer and roller dogs at the gas station

Damn he’s practically the title sponsor. The Epstein Files: brought to you by Donald Trump

Listen Bluesky devs we have the “Following“ feed and ”Discover” feed. What I’m proposing is a “Cat” feed. Only pictures of cats. Feel free to Venmo me the money now.

Is this fart friend or foe?