WHAT: Aaron Esh (spring 2026) OCCASIONS: legerdemain or leaving a single black rose on the pillow of an exiled dictator, causing him to stutter, “they’re b-b-back” when he sees it. IF IT WERE A SCENT: deck of cards, dipped in bourbon, on fire EMOTIONAL RANGE: ruthless/sexypants #MJMfashionGuide

Why is Aaron Esh making such hot clothes? What does he want from us?

Ah, fall, when a young man’s fancy turns to soup.

When they’re extra-high-waisted they’re called boobcut jeans

Is removing the flimsy little jackets from your chickpeas in the DSM?

19 years into marriage, there are still surprises. I just walked into a room and my husband looked up from his sketchbook and said “What’s going on with the word ‘bride’? Why is it so…equestrian?”

This is all of us rn

I've become a more positive person through lying.

All these dads with their family-canceling headphones

I remember standing on this platform, 40 years ago, reading a paperback of “On the Road” and thinking, God, this guy is so corny.

September 11th haunts me less than it used to and that feels right but also hard to believe. If you’re interested, years ago I wrote down my experience of that day. The Path to Here medium.com/@FeralCrone/...

I don’t know what to make of this but it does make me want to watch some Designing Women www.washingtonpost.com/style/power/...

Anglophiles love telling you the best sitcom ever is something like "Porridge Lads" (3 seasons, 6 episodes).

POSSIBLE NEW IDIOMS: The peanut butter don’t spread Kayaking the data Princess of Pretty looking for her own damn kitchen & THAT’S an Edinburgh coin purse Pec shortage in Provincetown Ksssh ksssh, skater! Ksssh, Ksssh. Petticoat on a baguette & honey in the closet The Stanwyck kiss off

My uncle is taking me into town to buy some new Pokémon cards

I thought you were saying the Department of Whore

This administration is a clown car and RFK jr. is a killer clown

A year ago, doctors told me I had neuroendocrine cancer of the pancreas. I’d probably been living with it for a decade. I will likely never be cured. But after a year of surgeries, radiation and monthly shots with a giant needle, I’m not going anywhere anytime soon. defector.com/my-life-with...

Have you tried being more fun about it? Failing that, have you tried being more tantalizing about it?

Wearing Eileen Fisher, ninja armor for women of a certain age, with its understated palettes and ample room for concealed weapons and lethal opinions

Going to the jeweler today to appraise some things I have from my dad, and I found myself being extra meticulous about my grooming regimen before I went to bed as though I’m a down-on-her-luck widow putting on her Sunday best before going to pawn her wedding ring in a Merchant Ivory film.

Current favorite things: - The One-Armed Lion Tamer: A Memoir by Ruggerfield P. Tomé - holy water spritz - rage mint - millennial ghosts - imaginary sunglasses - the vaccine underground

[wearing a fascinator to my dental appointment]

I’m the mother of one child and 326 browser tabs

He was big, dumb, and attractive, just like the moon

a specific skill I've developed over the past ~20 years is crafting responses to emails sent to me, but intended for that other Naomi Wolf

Insecure C E About their Genitals E N T S

Ever fallen in love with a word that doesn’t exist? Malfortunately, I have.

I’m sorry I referred to your husband as a Build-A-Bear

At a resort in the Caribbean and every song played in the background sounds like an island version of “Bela Lugosi’s Dead”?

Everyone needs a Goth note in their childhood & mine was the whispered memory of my Great Uncle William. My Grandmother Roberta would say his name, stop what she was doing, & look into the distance. Then some aunt would whisper, “Fell off a cliff during a college Botany field trip.”

Sometimes I like to fall into bed the way people on tv jump out of planes

Jaws (50) pausing briefly to don reading glasses before approaching a lone and unlucky swimmer

Yasssss, work queen

3 chocolate covered almonds revives me like CPR

I love when my dog gets a faraway look on her face and I know she’s cooking up some dog ideas

Friends, things are not great, so here are a few good things: music, art, comedy, nature, food, and animals. Please read, please share, please clap... www.gojeffgo.com/good-good-th...

When no one notices you got your hair cut

Me when someone refers to “God” in what I thought was a normal conversation.

In my neighbor’s driveway, the aftermath of a holiday barbecue: an overflowing recycling container, an assortment of beach chairs, a Cozy Coupe on its side, and, by the curb, Been-Through-Some-Shit Barbie™️ and Really-Trying-This-Time Ken™️ are sleeping it off.

The first deep-dish pope.

WHAT: Matty Bovan (fall 2025) OCCASIONS: ironic prom, ironic bridesmaid, ironic temp work, serious synth playing IF IT WERE A SCENT: traces of cigarette smoke & perfume on the vinyl seats of a diner booth EMOTIONAL RANGE: inspired/wrathful #MJMfashionGuide

Andry José Hernández Romero, I remember you, even if I do not know how to articulate my horror, rage, & sorrow at your treatment by my government. No one has heard from you in 44 days. As vigil, I’m posting a photo of you every day until you are returned from El Salvador.

Sorry I’m late. I had to change after getting negged super hard by a woman dressed like Rex Kwon Do from Napoleon Dynamite.

I’m sorry I referred to the NFL draft as America’s Next Top Big Boy

Mid April in Pennsylvania, cold and windy today. Last week’s magnolia flower petals rot on the sidewalk, brown and slick as banana peels. The cars are powdered green-gold. Spring has sprunk.

Spirit animal for the sad and sexy

People are mad as hell in Delco, PA!

You know what I could really go for right now? One of those large cash settlements