FUCKING HELL

Argentina hasn’t had this this much trouble with a small Atlantic island country since 1982

Wore my Taylor Swift T to Metallica in honour of her wedding

Spent the evening in an athletics stadium #metallica

Accurate uncontroversial list of UK cities by size

I know people mourn the loss of the "global town square" but some of us are having a much easier time without any Belgians seeing our posts from 15 minutes ago

What? What?

Are minutes usually this long?

look I'm not saying sacrificing Matt Goodwin in a wicker man would definitely improve the way England play, I'm just saying we can't definitely rule that out

Can't miss an opportunity to share my favourite ever typo, carved in stone above the door of Nottingham's Galleries of Justice

Nooooooooo

Accidentally started the teen off again about how much she hates Tariq Ali (it's that writing style)

Ooh harathy kanay

So I'm eleven years late to this as is appropriate for a man of my vintage, but Deep in the Bottom (of Africa), banger, right?

So in the past £70,000 was rich because we didn't think we would earn that much so it's a good place to start tax, but now £67,000 is poor because it's what a politician I like was earning when he made a mistake.

Ffs

Parent's keen for their kids to stay in school, a gofund me for aircon for the school has raised £3300 since 9:30 last night

Air conditioned 'spoons! Air conditioned 'spoons!

One Perfect Shot Platoon (1986) Director - Oliver Stone

Wow. All the trains have stopped across all of Germany because of a nationwide rail communications failure. I'm on one of them. I am fascinated by what could possibly cause this. And... I guess I'm going to have the whole night on a train to ponder it. apnews.com/article/germ...

A decade+ since I was inadvertently invited to a Downing Street room with Facebook/Google/etc and Cameron walked in and asked everyone what they'd do to boost youth referendum turnout and a grand woman shouted "WE NEED GRIME ARTISTES, DOES ANYONE KNOW ANY GRIME ARTISTES" and I began to doubt Remain.

I'm sorry what

me: do you think we’ll make it off the Earth? will our last farewell to a dying sun be broadcast from the bridge of a starship? or scratched, feverish, into the walls of a broiling cave? them: we meant if you had any questions about the job

In unprecedented heat wave news the kids school is closing for two days and the leavers prom is postponed til next week!

FB remaining completely sane (via a chum):

If, like me, you like politics and you like the 90s I'm sure you will also enjoy this image of Andy Burnham and his wife in their uni days (image via @thetimes.com)

What do Uruguay and Berlin have in common? Neither of them have a wall.

Here we, here we, here we fucking go

“It’s already full of algae and the paint’s peeling off!”

England team perfectly in tune with the spirits of the nation, hoping no one will really notice or exploit how under strength our defence is.

Messi xkcd.com/3260/

It starts today!!!

Did everyone just shut up or something?

Well yes Keir, I think he has one in mind. Keir Starmer holds out prospect of cabinet job for Andy Burnham - giftarticle.ft.com/giftarticle/... via @FT

Graham Linehan being interviewed by Neil Innes on Chain Reaction from 2014 on 4 Extra. What a different world we lived in.

Heading out for pints be like

what a chart!

Olivier Giroud is a very handsome man and was an underrated striker, but he could make an absolute fortune recording audiobooks to send you to sleep. 🇫🇷😴

Does your child know who Will Stancil is? It may be time to intervene

You can in fact use the parental controls on phones and laptops to enforce a curfew on them and it ISN'T easy for them to get around is as long as they don't read the email that Google sends them when they are 13 telling them how to turn it off.

Wait, the social media ban is a ‘nightly curfew’? Who’s going to check/enforce that?

Re: Banning social media for the under 16s. (It was in fact fine, and they got a solid mid-table result)

I particularly enjoyed the line: "Last year, Wayne Rooney amusingly blamed CBeebies legend Mr Tumble for his vasectomy because he 'couldn't go through' watching his TV show for a fifth time."

I don't think we are thinking enough about what we are depriving kids of if we ban them from social media for instance I have just watched a German man measure a slice of bread with a micrometer

If Curacao were in Germany, it would be the 53rd biggest city, between Solingen and Herne.

Watching Le Mans now to see if I can spot where I got pulled over

The 14 year old is doing a 2.4 hour endurance race online with some bloke he met on Discord, I'm sure this is fine. (I am in fact sure it is fine)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH

BBC Guest: “I think Gianni Infantino and FIFA are a bunch of greedy fucks.” BBC: “Apologies for the language.”