Feeling pretty depressed this week so I’m capitalizing on the opportunity and getting my Covid shot so I have an excuse to lie around, which is something I’d be doing anyway

When people moan about the crimes against Uptown committed by Aisha Chughtai I rebut with "JIMMY JOHN'S IS STILL IN THIS MALL!!!" and then they shut up real quick.

What's your secret to being online all the time without contracting computer madness? For me it's being pure of heart

Me: we all have the same 25 hours Friend: you mean 24 hours? Me, realizing my friend can’t afford the secret 25th hour: yes

Charlie Chaplain warned me and I didn't listen

i really thought fascism would feel less absurd

Bob Dylan: 🎵 in the dime stores and bus stations, people talk of situations 🎵 me, wisely: that's true. people DO be talking of situations

Here's a quandary: are you someone's guy? Are you contributing to the Marketplace of Guys or simply enjoying its spoils?

me and the boys all going crazy for a stranger with a big iron on his hip

my father-in-law is a “I know a guy” Guy. sadly all the old Guys are aging out of the Guy Economy. Guys are fundamentally incompatible with Hustle Culture because it’s not about “winning” a deal, it’s about collecting favors and goodwill in a mutually-beneficial cycle. protect your local Guy Economy

excited to share something that @whatapageturner.bsky.social and i have been working on - a whole month to celebrate the medium that we love! more information to follow, but we wanted to start getting the news out.

Old Soviet joke for today: A man walks into a newsstand every day, looks around, and leaves. After a long time of this, the owner says “Can I help you find something?” “I’m looking for the obituaries.” “The obituaries are in the back of the newspaper, comrade.” “Not the one I’m looking for.”

This is both beautiful and doable No need to spin up a massive trans zinester distro. I want *you* to do this if you have any access at all to a printer. The folks in your life who usually do this kind of thing are very tired right now. And remember: your library card gives you printing access!

Rock Looked Way Cooler Wet

hi! i am fundraising for two very close friends of mine, @dilettante-oji.bsky.social & their wife. they need some help making rent — they're $600 short. if you donate $20+, i'll send you mail. venmo + paypal: @allisonannecollage write RAT or use rat emoji in the description

Jaws is sublime, perfect, a cathedral.

hey dude, I noticed you attempting to carve a small space for joy in the face of overwhelming sadness. kind of problematic considering all the horrors

me, thinking, squinting hard and trying to list all the subgenres of metal i can remember

my “Coca-Cola doesn’t have typhoid in it” T-shirt has people asking a lot of questions already answered by my shirt

so stomach-churning you could drink cream and puke butter

reinventing buses is for chumps, I'm reinventing The Fathomless Fear Of Death Itself

will the government of Nova Scotia sell me a fancy print of this

obsessed with this vague notice from the government of Nova Scotia. Like it’s definitely about the new fire restrictions, but it also looks like a poster you’d find yellowed and curled on the bulletin board of a diner in a town where locals won’t talk about their missing kids

italian horror fans'll be like "you don't know Argento Fusilli? Oh, you must see "The Yellow Knife." It's shot all in green, except the blood. There's a 45 minute shot of a nun crucifying a clown with huge needles. A masterpiece"

This is almost as funny as real life, where the cops said anarchists are hard to infiltrate because they read too much

Survive and lose your shit, It's 2025

this is true, and I think it's important for young men to hear

look autocorrect I get that you're trying to help but if I type an actual English word letter-by-letter imma need you to LEAVE IT ALONE

A lot of 12 year olds are going to learn the phrase "op sec" in the next few years. "Are those burner shoes?" "I didn't think --" "You're not SUPPOSED to fucking THINK, Skylar, you're supposed to follow FUCKING PROTOCOL."

Free plums and propaganda.

the world, which seems tragically harsh and even doomed on a two coffees empty stomach, now seems alive with possibility after 900 calories of lunch. No conclusions to draw from that

Am I The Worst Person On Earth, Or Have I Simply Not Eaten For Six Hours a daily investigation by me

It took 10,000 years of human evolution to produce the tech bro who developed the innovative "Don't Die" philosophy.

Happy 15th anniversary of the peak achievement of literary criticism, to all who celebrate

Pandemic aged our brains faster, whether or not we got COVID, study says

in an unexpected and delightful turn of events, the estate of Thomas Kinkade comes out as anti-fascist thehill.com/blogs/in-the...

LeGuin wrote about the desire for 'unassailable safety' as one of the deep roots of evil, and I think about that a lot.

probably going to go offline for a little bit. it feels like Being Online has built up in my body like heavy metal poisoning and I need a cleanse to get the metaphorical lead out of my blood. I want to rediscover my reasons for getting out of bed every morning, and I'm not finding them here

I have stuff to do. I can't spend all morning laughing at this.

trying to choose a favorite sentence from this article and failing spectacularly

Reframing “dream job” as “dream role-in-my-community” has me feeling optimistic about work for the first time in a long time

AP reporter interviewed on MPR about recent near-collision of military bomber and Delta jet says the Minot, ND airport air traffic controllers work for a private contractor, a system that's been in place since 1982.

as a child growing up in the nineties, I knew two (2) things about George Carlin 1.) he was the conductor at Shining Time Station, and 2.) he was the drummer in the Beatles

never in my life have I felt more like a mom in a commercial than this morning when I noticed some dirt tracked in, scowled at it... then remembered my battery operated vacuum and cleaned it up with a smile

watched "entitled" on Netflix over the last two days and am disappointed how little discussion of it I can find!

Sick of everything being Orwellian or Kafkaesque. I demand more Scarrylous situations, where animals drive vehicles and run small businesses.

The two greatest evils known to mankind, A.I. and the person directly in front of you in line at the post office, have finally teamed up. We’re done.

"No more Amir Lockes" means NO MORE MARK HANNEMANS