The world can, and I cannot stress this too forcefully... just. fuck. off.

Starmer has the worst political instincts of any party leader in history. His entire strategy is trying to appease a bunch of people who already decided years ago they hated him. Meanwhile he's pissing off everybody who tolerated him.

It's the last half hour of the wedding disco and the DJ is now on autopilot. #totp

Don't think much of Aqua's version of Bez. #totp

🎶 Sound that my microwave makes when my food’s done Goes before “bong” on the tannoy at Luton Monica Chandler The Crosby who sings These are a few of my favourite Bings 🎶

Ha HA! Checkmate, pseudo rebels!

Christ on a bike. I finish watching a film, telly reverts to last channel and the first words I hear are Greg Wallace saying, "juicy peach, creamy cheese and salty ham" and I can't for the life of me look up to see if he's been allowed to go rogue in a BBC revenge edit. Need to puke now.

There's not one element of this gag that isn't both essential and perfect. Damn this is good.

Nietzsche abhors a vacuum www.worldofmoose.com/products/nie...

Some puns are so good that you can't believe you've neither heard of them nor thought of them before. I feel all my irritating mental habits have been for nothing now. Fuck..

I don't agree with antisemitism, but it sure looks tasty!

This. Like a thousand times over.

Fuck me. Google's gone to shit these days.

Ouch. Thoughts and prayers.

"...and you will know us by the shape of our bums". It's got a ring to it!

Just had this hidden memory revived and had to share. A genius piece of storytelling.

if stevie nicks and nikki sixx got together their couple name would be stinki stinx

Deffo workable peace plan.

Can’t believe Twitter keeps crashing despite Elon hiring the best 19-year-old interns that racism has to offer

Facebook memories just reminded me of this Spanish Nick Cave compilation album cover which - as someone on the Twitter said at the time - looks like a poster advertising him playing a valleys workingman’s club

Post a picture of you that’s not actually a picture of you

OK. Hands up who's imagined this a thousand times in their head already? ✋

Well, who knew the most positive thing about AI would be that it could manifest what the majority of us were thinking Zelensky had EVERY right to do in response to Trump!

OK. Who had... "Man who demonised the entire nation of Mexico as rapists, with minimal evidence, to justify excluding them from the USA now personally intervenes to import a potential rapist, with plenty of supporting evidence, into the USA." ..on their insanity bingo card?

Does this also imply the defect of the Jedi,and the warranty of the Jedi?

return of the Jedi is not possible without the receipt of the Jedi

Repost with a pic you saved but haven't found any use for.

Three fights in first nine seconds of US vs. Canada game at 4 Nations www.detroitnews.com/story/sports...

beaker on magazine covers: thread

My favourite thing to say in a Cardiff accent is "You don't puts tomatos in a carbonarra"

You can’t polish a turd, but you can autotune a fart.

Sly & The Family Stone were better than Sly & The Family Scissors, but not quite as good as Sly & The Family Paper

Move with care. And make things.

The Sex Briskets

First world problems? I've just made nachos bel grande with guacamole inspired dip and nacho cheese sauce instead of actual guacamole and just cheese. Struggle is real as fuck around here, I can tell you.

It would have been Janey’s birthday tomorrow, so let us all post this in remembrance.

Some blocks are more satisfying than others. Got followed by Paul McCartney's official account this morning. Unusually for Paul he uses a Bluesky account called tradingwithdonna and only ever talks about bitcoin.

The most accident-prone person in Scotland.

When fancy restaurants charge you like $5 for tea when all they're really doing is putting a tea bag in some hot water, I call that a steep price

Borrowed my dad's brand new car while my parents were on holiday. Took 4 mates away for a trip during which we tried a "Dukes of Hazzard" jump over a humpback bridge. On return my dad says there's a quiet rattle, but only he can hear it. 3 years later the MOT revealed we'd popped a shock absorber.

American has peaked. It has no further purpose after this ultimate expression of its culture.

Josh is short for Joshua which is English for Yeshua which is rendered in Latin as Jesus which is Jésus in Spanish which has the nickname Chuy which is pronounced Chewie which is short for Chewbacca which is Wookiee for Josh

I've got my "Population of Pontypridd" example of AI being useless. 2 sentences containing 3 "facts", all of which are wrong. But I've never described myself as a horse, not publically at least. Maybe I should start. Could get a horse out of it.

So... some years ago I made up a horse for a joke. And AI took me seriously.

Anyone else finding it a bit spooky that, apart from the conversations actually being recorded for the doc, every other person in the studio desk area is tight lipped and silent at all times. Not even a side whisper going on. #bandaid