Couple of coats of Creosote and it could be Gavin Henson

Vamos!

Happy Birthday USA

There's occasionally still some worthwhile insights at the other place

By comparison, Donny The Nonce makes Col. Gadaffi look subtle, sane & sophisticated

I have a set of transferable skills from my days playing wheelchair rugby if these fuckers ever come to Cardiff ☠

One panino Two panini Three paninis Many paninis's The grocers' apostrophe has gone exponential

When I tried to check in the desk attendant called me classist for wanting to book a room when some people have never had a room

Here's my tip for this hot weather - a couple of T shirts in the fridge. ...in a zip-lock bag, though, else they come out smelling of cheese or salami or whatever else might be in there

Bring back disci volanti - I haven't seen them in years

"The Americans can't get the slime out of their capital's monument pool and will arrest you for touching it," sounds like the sort of lie they'd tell us in the Soviet Union so we'd stop bitching about bread lines.

The Private Memoirs And Confessions Of A Justified Muppet

I may be hungry but I sure ain't weird

Instructions for REFORM UK voters: 1. Write ‘X’ for the candidates you don’t like. It sends a clear message that you want them cancelled. 2. Leave the REFORM box empty so it's nice and WHITE. 3. Don’t eat the pencil. Oh, alright, if you insist.

"Content" is just a marketing term for that trivial stuff that comes between the adverts.

Everyone in Southampton who has had their property damaged by the coked up twats should report Farage for incitement and claim damages directly from him. He's got at least £5m to spare.

The 1900s was the decade from 1900 to 1909, not the century from 1900 to 1999

Things are looking bad for Trump when even these guys pull out of the Freedom 250 gig! youtu.be/033FInn1wH8

I reckon that Freedom 250 Concert will just be Kid Rock and this guy. Yee haw! youtu.be/PBpyCdy4pMg

Toy Mic Trevor has also withdrawn from the Freedom 250 Concert

Novichok-sticks

Look, plantar fascitis sucks but I think this guy has bigger issues going on

Just finished this by @nickharkaway.com Really enjoyed it. In my mind's ear, Doublewide has the voice of Sidney Greenstreet as Casper Gutmann, and I couldn't help but grin everytime he was on the page. "I can't believe you foie gras'd that motherfucker" had me in stitches too 🤣

It'll be interesting when Zia Yusuf eventually realises that he's the frog and not the scorpion

What my internal monologue looks like...

Post a picture of a Beatles song

The Hills Have Ayes Romancing The Stauner Licence To Kilt There Will Be Fud The Good, The Bad and Kirkcaldy ...and, of course, anything from the Disnae Film Studios #ScottishMovies

Doctors say that fluoride helps build strong teeth. A guy who snorts cocaine off toilet seats and takes raccoon penises home for “further study” says it causes autism. For busy parents, it can be hard to know who to trust.

Looks like Trump dancing to YMCA

From 10 years ago, Private Eye

Obligatory May the Fourth re-up of this hip hop gem youtu.be/2cKoR7s_BOQ

Post your warning sign

I don't think much of Ross Noble's new act

Proper Tale-Of-Two-Cities dinner, this. It was the best of meals, it was the worst of meals. It was divine, it was diabolical. I was ashamed of myself, I was proud of myself.

Good call. I was just wondering what record to put on next 🔥

I like my cities to be sittable, shittable, and public transittable.

Getting a pre-emptive strike in when it looks like it's about to kick off: the French call it déjà fu

Quality! One of the best things on radio is back for another series

I miss the days when I could buy a piece of software, own that software and rely on that software

If you see this sign outside my house it means I've wired my doorbell to the mains

This is a quality arrangement for solo guitar. Cocky little fucker even managed to squeeze the drum solo in, chware têg! youtu.be/rISENsVuGdY

It is easier to pass a needle through the eye of a rich man than to enter a camel in Heaven

Dear @labourpartyuk.bsky.social you may wish to fix this.

When a person loses 1 sense the others are heightened. That's why people who have no sense of humor have an amazing sense of self-importance.

Band from the bathroom Cistern Of A Down

For fuck sake NASA, just use S.I. units like the rest of the world

"Mary Mary quite contrary, how does your garden grow?" "I'm not Mary. This isn't my garden" "Who are you then?" "I’m Mary. Get the FUCK out of my garden"

It’s World Homeopathy Awareness Week. The less aware of it you are, the more good it will do you.

As predictable as gravity, techno or the two times table 🙄 Bibi the Butcher doesn't need a reason, he just wants an excuse