Hot take: The traditional Mormon marriage rocks because it has no personal vows, limits the attendance to under 50 people, and keeps the ceremony to 15 minutes. Short remarks, relatively short "vow", and short congratulations on the way out. Only thing better is probably eloping at courthouse.

He's actually describing why it's a racket, but putting the benefit on the wrong party. Insurance companies love this broken system.

JOKER: Not so fast, Bat-JERK! My LAUGHBangs will leave you BLIND as a BAT! BLUESKY BATMAN: Oof. Many people suffer from reduced vision. Not funny. JOKER: It's like, it's a pun. It's just wordplay. BLUESKY BATMAN: Sorry if I'm not in the mood for "jokes" while SCOTUS shreds our constitutional rights

This man said he would have yogurt for his superbowl snack. He actually meant sauerkraut when he said all he eats are ferments.

Whatever you do, don't let him sit on a wall! He's very hard to put back together, if he were to fall down.

they should try having a cuisine that's anything other than (admittedly excellent) pastries, elaborate bird tortures, and "meh, add more butter and it'll be fine"

Genuinely funny seeing the Euros get so mad at this. Of course Europe has good food, but the lack of Mexican/Latin food is depressing over there. If you think Pace is a sorry excuse for salsa try any of their hilarious attempts.

Blouin is right. The other two staying in guarantees McAdams. Fight for ranked choice if you have a problem with it. Complaining about privilege and a perfectly normal poll doesn't do anything.

The hand is labour. Elmo is capital.

Yes. The pattern is that when the real Trump starts to falter or do something that would result in lowering his popularity, they substitute a fake, imaginary Trump into their news stories who is acting rationally and normally, inventing rationales for his actions that he himself won't articulate

To MAGA, masculinity only means the toxic and evil parts: exploitation, pissing contests, and general assholery. They care nothing about honest hard work, chivalry, providing for a family, liking women, or protecting the vulnerable.

"Talarico is a vegan." "Paxton pardoned a pedophile." "Uh, well, Talarico says God is nonbinary or something?" "Paxton pardoned a pedophile." "Um, Talarico is, uh, low T?" "Paxton pardoned a pedophile." "Talarico is going to institute sharia law!" "Paxton pardoned a pedophile."

Eternally relevant:

I am really struggling to see the line between merchandise security at Home Depot and Medicare fraud. Two things that happen in completely separate circles from each other.

Screen time isn't the problem. The content on the screens is. The exception to this is reading books to your kids which should always be physical books.

Hello I am the president of a country whose economy depends on consumer spending. My two major initiatives so far have been a sales tax on everything and then a war that sent all prices skyrocketing

Trying to sell FICA payroll taxes to the American public in our day would be impossible. And certain online leftists would be some of the loudest opponents.

we're seeing if grogu's entire body can fit inside the gom jabbar box

Heath Ledger, Alan Tudyk, and Paul Bettany in the same film. One of the best needle drops in all of cinema. Just a bunch of goofs being goobers the whole time. 10/10 film.

I say we rebrand this as Doordash Populism. You could go get your own burrito from the place next door, but it sounds better if you could have a free burrito taxi from across town.

I was watching a review of the new Steam Controller from a very big channel. They complained about the screw holes being too big and obvious. That's good! I want to know how to take apart my controller!

I used to be good at Computer. Now Computer thinks it is good at me. But it actually isn’t??????

Fractures Emerge Between GOP’s Pro-Pedophilia, Extremely Pro-Pedophilia Wings

Since when is joining the Armed Forces about personal freedom and bodily autonomy? The whole thing is you voluntarily sign away your personal freedom to be a tool for the government.

One of my proudest pieces, "Isometric Exercise"

war_iran_final-blow_v1.pdf war_iran_final-final-blow-v2.pdf war_iran_final-blow-no edits.pdf war_iran_final-blow-no edits (1).pdf war_iran_final-blow-no edits (1) APPROVED.pdf IRANWARPLANSFINALFINALFINAL.pdf IRANWARPLANSFINALFINALFINAL (1).pdf

after a few playthroughs of slay the spire 2, i'm ready to call it: we have another Good video game. this brings the total number of Good video games in the world to two, joining the original slay the spire

remember when the IRS put out a a free online tax filing system where you could just do your taxes through the IRS and it was actually well made and was pretty well recieved and then the tax filing industry and Republicans killed it and now you have to use TurboTax again

Goodbye world. Hello Spire.

Yet another reason to tax billionaires out of existence. That much wealth and notoriety inhibits their right to a fair trial.

UK: Prince Andrew arrested. South Korea: Former President Yoon sentenced for life. Brazil: Former President Bolsonaro serving a 27-year sentence. USA: President Trump demands $10 billion payout from taxpayers.

If this is what raw milk and ferments do for you I think I'll take a chance with the autism.

10/10 convenience 9/10 cleaning 0/10 for safety - will break your toes at 3 AM.

Again, it really all depends what you are hyping when you talk AI. It's a buzzword. GenAI is not AGI. Machine learning is cool and has been improving things on the edges for decades now. For the cost, is it actually better than other search functions and spreadsheets?

Anyone ever thought about how weird getting your first teeth must be. Like, you're just chilling as a baby and one day there's just bones in your mouth????

People think the highest Michelin rating is 3 stars, but there is a hidden 4th level where the Michelin Man comes and kills everyone at your restaurant and mixes your ashes in tire rubber. Then he exalts you by wearing you around his waist for all eternity

Due process is inconvenient. That's kind of the whole point.

Bro, what do you mean the AI-based avatar is out-of-network?

many people are going to be tempted to say this proves the weakness of peaceful protest. this is incorrect because it assumes this happening is a failure of peaceful protest rather than the mechanism by which it succeeds

Reporter: You received a letter from AG Pam Bondi making several demands…. Walz: I would just give a pro tip to the AG. There's 2 million documents in the Epstein files we're still waiting on. Go ahead and work on those

People are being executed in the street over a problem that straight up does not exist and both parties are complicit in the lie

Oh yeah. For sure. MLK Jr. would never mix politics and religion. All that religious education and ministering was just a side hobby he saved for Sunday mornings only.

People can say they didn’t vote for this but people are liars

“ICE isn’t the Gestapo. The Gestapo was…” (proceeds to describe qualities that apply to what ICE is currently doing)

Suspiciously asking my wife who's funding her anytime she criticizes me

Man, AI can't help but add extra fingers. Even to fictional characters.

It's really funny to watch Dave Ramsey's show these days. All his employees are comfortable calling Trump out. But Dave is in a constant state of cope because Trump proposes ideas 100% against his morals every week.

Just make crime illegal. Problem solved.