NYT article on Pluribus gave enough for me to sleuth this out

How about we shut down the government for this very popular and specific goal and then, hear me out, we hold out for like a month and a half and then, ok this part is important, after a watershed election where we ran the table, ONLY THEN, fold and don't get the one thing we said we wanted.

Happy Sunday

dawg not the steakhouse wedding font

Conan what is best in life? To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, to hand your wife a nice hot chocolate you’ve just made her

one of my wife's favorite bits is telling me when I've violated bits of the UCMJ

Looks like deadlift’s back on the menu

Nightnight

👇

Ernest Goes to LA Fitness

I will not be making a zohran meme at this time

what are we up to tonight folks

Sometimes I see people like 20 tweets deep into an argument with Grok. Like, what are you doing brother? You are trying to win an argument with a vending machine.

Solution rhymes with ovaltine

[hot ones] me: *finishes off gallon of milk* sean evans: ok are you ready for your first wing

Fascinated by this woman I knew in school who has retained the same Instagram but rebranded it first as a furry account, then a pageant queen account, and now as a rave account, all without deleting any past photos

So true AOC

I feel like we have the opportunity to turn David Lynch's quote into this moment's "Keep Calm and Carry On" and it's a far better rallying cry too.

I couldn't be a mainstream journalist these days. One day you're doing a completely normal interview with an actress and suddenly thousands of poorly socialised weirdos are getting the callipers out to say you're biologically pre-destined to be a HR officer

i couldn't remember "Tom of Finland's" name so i googled "Bill of Sweden" that did not help

your honor, every single crunchwrap is more supreme than this court

Cackling, throwing up

guys love to say "victory shall be ours"

Is Last Remnant any good

life would be perfect if trump and eric adams were just two podcasters who queen out together

The sloppy joe is a delicious food and yet the form factor is awful. Too sloppy. Should be a salad of some kind

watching Game of Wool and arguing over who's "the hot knitter"

calling my child a tacomaxxing spiceboy for assembling taco seasoning for a lunch

Thanks to this bussin new #rstats 📦 by @hadley.nz, you can now yeet rows and vibe_check columns in your data frames, no cap hadley.github.io/genzplyr/

say it with me, everyone

Forgive me father for I have sinned. It has been three days since I caught up on all the Instagram reels my wife has sent me

back from 24hrs in twitter jail, I guess they suspended me and then un-suspended me without any communication about it?

kind of fucked up that not only did most of them just forget about charlie kirk, but that ones that remember him confuse him with steven crowder

succubus - female demon that seduces men incubus - male demon that seduces women vengabus - non-binary demon that likes to party

BRUTAL

our moving date was going to be the week before the sailing release on runescape but they delayed it a week so now we're moving two days after launch lmao

Me at my kids band show

nancy pelosi clearing six figures on polymarket from successfully betting that nancy pelosi will not seek reelection

didn't know til now that Zuckerberg's daughters are named maxima, august and aurelia. real big "I think about the roman empire as depicted in Gladiator (2000) at least 6 times a day" energy

Bad news for the pelosi tracker

Tag yourself I'm "tiny humorous bones"

Get in losers, we’re transvestigating Arnold Schwarzenegger

still thinking about this

congrats on your transition #transgender