I did not do any planning and realized I probably shouldn't bench press immediately after a blood draw

Now that we’ve moved house I can safely say that we literally lived on the street where Shaun of the Dead was filmed for 6 years lmao

crystalline obama: uhhh, let me be clear,

Type of shit I’m on

Guess who has gout? This bitxh!!

Getting booking dot com ads for the holiday I just came back from

Merry wokemas, and to all a good woke

Did matching meme t shirts this year

If Santa and his bag of toys weighed exactly 160kg and was as easy to grip as a barbell, would you have the strength to pick him up and send him on his merry way?

he's making a list he's making another list he's making a third list santa is autistic

crushed ice is one of those things I thought was cool when I was a kid until I realized it has almost zero practical use cases

raw biscuit dough tastes good as hell when you don't have salmonella in your ear telling you it's nasty

Geriatric lifter bench presses the old fashioned way. Can this elderly lifter get a like from the algorithm???

When you are not allowed to steal Christmas dinner

Geriatric lifter bench presses the old fashioned way. Can this elderly lifter get a like from the algorithm???

Jeg spurte og alle kjente deg her

mini cooper

people think making video games is fun. making video games is actually about going to the psychology mines each day to be mentally broken and then 2-3 years later a cozy crafting game inexplicably pops out

Trying to “have a normal sleep schedule”, not paying off so far

drinking ginger beer and taking a little nap at 8p like a meemaw

the year I maxed in OSRS twice

the matrix is a christmas movie if you believe

unfortunately it turns out that when you have a 15 year old iPad mini it does eventually stop being able to do things

Do NOT make fun of me for my tiny arms It is acceptable to make fun of me for my terrible 220kg deadlift First workout in the new gym space/first workout in about a month

full body workout, first workout in a month. I expect to die in the morning

I feel like I'm going to get a lot of use out of this Pluribus screencap

I'm so burned out at work... I just need a day off to idly install Linux on some devices

Do you ever think about the British English names for music notation and get scared

I would simply not compete in a sport where you get punched

Jake Paul vs Anthony Joshua

Don’t know what I’ve done that somehow I’ve now twice woken up in the new house with inexplicable foot pains that go away in a day, first the right foot and now the left

White guys will spend four days in Finland and start tweeting stuff like “how’s the Finnish egirl tech”

going to end up with 99 sailing/remaxing my account while on vacation in finland it seems

ɴᴏᴛ ɴᴏᴡ ʜᴏɴᴇʏ….ᴍᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ɪꜱ ᴡᴏʀᴋɪɴɢ ᴏɴ ᴀ ɢʟᴏᴄᴋᴇɴꜱᴘɪᴇʟ ᴘᴀᴛᴄʜ ꜰᴏʀ ʜᴇʀ ꜱʏɴᴛʜᴇꜱɪᴢᴇʀ !

Adults should not have to wake up at 545 to get to a flight. That’s twenties behavior

Vance is stealing my look

Losing it at this ai generated trump family tree

im a powerful ally to all pretty ladies

In honor of the new Divinity game I was like “I should fire up Divine Divinity, that was a great game” and got flash banged by the fact that steam tells me I last opened the game in 2013

We have a vision

British nightmares be like: Tesco club card NOT accepted 😈

I think about this tweet every day

local deity after a hard day's work:

unfortunately one week of living in a house with bidets in every toilet has made me into the chad bidet meme