Talking shit with the girls is sacred

Girl with sooooo many feelings

They should make a weekend that doesn’t end in post weekend drop imo

NYC Chicago LA ultra train when

Girls is so pretty

an hour after girl weekend voice: need more girl weekend

Responding to people wishing me a safe flight by saying “I’m not really in charge of that”

Cruising at terminal 3 in lax meet me by the Jamba Juice

If you do the Riyadh Comedy Festival and don't tell a joke that gets you imprisoned by the monarchy then what was even the point of having Trump on your podcast

Adam sandlers click was so right things take too long but the time that passes is where all the important stuff is (me wanting both to skip to a year in the future and also being sad that this weekend is almost over)

lmaoooooo

Platonic solid is when I do my friend a favor and then don’t kiss them after

Polyamory students be like “sorry I can’t hang out tonight I have a group sex assignment due tomorrow morning”

Things that are good: Girl Girl pile Puppy girl Friendship Dykes Girls Yeaggggg

Olive oyl voice:

Dudes rock

They made unicorn hunting woke

If you told 8 year old me that I was a polyamorous woman who thinks weird abstract performance art is good the only thing she would have trouble believing is that last part

Ok so like I get it I think

Snookie is the original the rizzler

Time after electro and before scabbing is always good

It’s the Richard Gere thing I solved it

GAMERS !!!!

Selling tins I’ve replaced the edibles from with regular candy to middle schoolers and watching them pretend to be high

It’s so nice having a phone that can hold a charge again

Do you think we could convince hegseth it’s gay to be a secretary

I’m gonna be soooooooooo fucking

universes beyond: human pet guy

We're just little monkeys. Don't expect so much from little monkeys

I have reverse imposter syndrome where I think everyone else is as competent as I am

I’m Sarah. Btw.

I poast a lot but yall should see some of the shit that I manage to filter out and delete before hitting send

Literally I’m just a kitty cat sitting in a dog bed rn

Milf with tboy swag save me save me milf with tboy swag

magic the gathering

did you know NASA used so many staples and paperclips during the Apollo program that US Steel had to do special manufacturing orders just for them to fill the gaps? google “Operation Paperclip” to learn more!

Ice on my balls ice ice on my balls

Ointment on my balls oint oint ointment on my balls

Trees are cool because it's just a big hard plant oozing out clear sticky sweet yummy sap onto it's giant veiny surface that you can't even wrap two hands around and they are like at least 10 years older than you like what?

"it's to protect children" you do realize they all view adult women as children right?

its Put Your Dick In Me Friday, reskeet to put your dick in me on friday

Ow my freaking taint

Indoor skydiving costs $90 for 2 minutes?? I once paid $4 to go in a tanning bed for 8 minutes. LIKE this if you think it should always cost the same to go inside a machine!!!

trans women giving bi gamer boys a chance may very well spark the revolution >.<

Little before & after from today’s DIY project 💪 Did some pipe straightening. (The fucking moron I bought this house from botched the sink drain to where used sinkwater got trapped in this little bend)

Love the international girlfriend network even though I’m not on it rn

Used to be if you wanted Dwight on your cards you had to hire someone to paint it for you

Anyway I’m at electrolysis for a couple hours ama

Zap zap time gamers ouchies my balls moment

hold your head up high, doll. put some cunt in your step. you stab yourself with a needle every week to be that hot, stop hunching over and hiding the body you earned now is not the time for doubt