I would encourage everyone to listen to the slate political gabfest these days because every episode is David Plotz gently suggesting we’re being too hard on people in the Epstein files and then Emily Bazelon and John Dickerson gently telling him to shut the fuck up

a joke we simply didnt have time for in this segment was a reporter saying "ive heard of Sara Plain and Tall, but a pilot named Sara crashing a Plane into a Tall Building!? It happened, folks!"

I just did an eyebrow waggle to try and get someone to sample a gin cocktail and now I feel so dirty, I need to shower

This is either a terrible marriage or an incredible one and there is no way to know

Pee Funk

love when there's an article about how life is sustainable in the superheated waters surrounding a hydrothermal volcanic fissure on the ocean floor and then like six paragraphs in you find out the author's parents are chemosynthetic bacteria 🙄

Still remember when I first read the beatitudes as a teenager and being like "wait why isn't this what we do?"

i used to have Wine Opinions but i found out about people who give a shit about the clone # of the vines that the grapes grew on (cloned from original vines in France) and I decided all my opinions are ignorant. there is only yummy wine and yucky wine for my idiot palate bsky.app/profile/padr...

Fun fact Gooey Gus, aka the Ghostwriter doll that scared the shit out of me as a kid, was designed by horror legend Tom Savini! From Dawn of the Dead to Friday the 13th to Texas Chainsaw Massacre to PBS kids programming

Finally. His time has come.

Give it up for John Carpenter, he predicted Mar-a-Lago face over 30 years ago

Dear God I rented this movie when I was 13 not knowing what it was about, not a great movie experience

All this looksmaxxing discourse and everyone’s too afraid to just admit that kids these days fuck with Bruce Campbell in Escape from LA

Trying to keep the ol’ self esteem up during job applications so I’m blasting this beat inside my head 24/7 youtu.be/xoUxTFNtEYQ?...

Honored to have an essay in this volume! I wrote about Common Core and our lapsed commitment to liberal education.

Other than that, Mrs Lincoln, how were the Porn Awards

Pretty furious how hard Netflix made it to find this on the homepage. BUT! Once I found it, it went way beyond the hype, two thumbs up.

My dude Matt has a good thread about the recent history of the government's UFO disclosures.

Reporter: Do aliens exist? Obama: *chuckles* Technically no, a time ghoul is from Earth. Just not today’s Earth

I know I’m playing with fire making fun of furries on here but man if you can’t appreciate the perfect delivery of this line you can yiff off

Alysa Liu. A proud product of Oakland.

I could pick any number of 30 rock episodes, but the hardest I’ve laughed might be the season four finale which brings together so many hilarious threads but also has Liz meeting her dream man only for him to methodically explain how furries have sex

some jokes from our Halloween episode about a trial to see who the real Santa is

I remember when I first saw newsradio when I was like 11 and thought “the guy who plays Jimmy James is the funniest person I’ve ever seen in my life.“ A rare time where my young self was 100% right

to put in context how warped this country is with regard to education, I paid more for a Big Mac and fries yesterday than I did for 3 years of a bachelors in one of the best universities in the world

Screams in elderly millennial.

Good god Evan Dando sounds like a godforsaken mess. Fun fact he spent the Rodney King riots zonked out in a studio with Rick James planning how they were going to overthrow the government www.avclub.com/the-evan-dan...

(Watching a feed of world leaders waiting for me while the speakers blast Digital Underground’s ‘humpty dance’ for the fifth time in a row) “Mr President should we join the now?” “ABSOLUTELY. NOT.”

“Well, that does it! … Tomorrow he dies.”

I once got in an argument in an English castle with a woman dressed as a 15th century noblewoman about whether Cromwell was a patriot (her argument) or a bloodthirsty murderer (mine). I owned her landed gentry ass.

new Strip Law clip where we thoughtfully and respectfully grapple with the legacy of one of the titans of animation that came before us

I've been working on a new painting toy for pixel artists, and I'd love to find a few folks to test it out and give feedback. I'm already having a lot of fun with it. Message me here or email! garrett @ brainfruit . studio

The second-best DIE HARD came out in 1995 and contains both a Trump joke and a Hillary Clinton joke, not to mention some juicy presidential history about Chester A. Arthur.

It only just occurred to me, when everyone was talking about ultimate Dad movies there is a glorious action fest where the major set piece revolves around our main characters arguing about directions

DC Statehood yesterday

The Majestic. Cowardly cheese bullshit that wastes Bruce Campbell

The only trad life I wanna see is dudes sTRADdlin’ each other to form the greatest water skiing human pyramid bikini island has ever seen

As soon as you walk into a room identify the Sepiroth. If you can’t, then these putrid stains of humanity are beneath your intellect and in a just world would serve your ambition

i am begging people to understand that without black church attendees, especially women, the democratic party is not a viable political party and religion isnt just about right wing evangelicals.

and i think the example of washington — whose peer, in this regard, is frederick douglass — is a reminder that artifice and performance are important parts of democratic society, and that the contempt for virtue signaling is corrosive. virtue is meant to be signaled!

It’s been 40 years and not a single other mouse detective has even attempted to come for that title. King shit.

This is the reason behind the Trump administration’s intense desire to ban Talarico content. If they lose the evangelicals, they lose all their power.

Excited to announce my new comic book "Wolfman vs Invisible Man" where our lycanthropic hero must use his fangs and claws to take on America's insatiable need to other its black citizens into fungible gestalts, living as shrouds, trapped as reflections of their white peers' desires

I maintain: Dare to be Stupid is his best song Eat It is his best parody Beverly Hillbillies is his best merging of two concepts

Final thought: I think everyone in this story, from Easy E to Suge to Dre to DOC to Snoop to Cube, is just happy Paul Giamatti was involved

I was in second place for my county XC meet until the final stretch when someone overtook me and the local paper took a photo of my devastated face and made it the cover of the sports section. I was so mad that the next race I ran into a tree on purpose and quit running for 3 years

Just saw yet another person talking about how AOC is too inexperienced to run for president, the exact same thing I heard people say about Barack Obama. funny how no one ever said that about Paul Ryan or JD Vance or Marco Rubio or…

Breaking: Tragedy at the Winter Olympics