Shit, now I’ll never fully enjoy drinking a quadrupel again. Ok, fine, maybe I will in a week or two.

Now I am no expert, but I think it is generally bad when a soccer team’s only shot on goal in the entire first half happened during a free kick.

Maybe Wu Tang can play during halftime and turn this game around.

All the worst millennials were born in 1984: -Vance -Zuck -Weiss -James O’Keefe -Jelly Roll -Platner I know this because I was born that year, and many of these less-famous terrible millennials were my classmates. Hell, I might be one of them, too, depending on how you feel about my movie takes.

Great reporting in this @rjritzel.bsky.social piece about an untenable situation in DC theater.

Yesterday I watched two bad comedies that were released nearly a century apart. Both suffered the same fundamental mistake: the actors made it too obvious they were in on the joke. It is comforting to realize that while comic sensibilities may evolve, aversion to cringe is a constant.

This article uses Lizzo as a springboard to examine how we have become WALL*E-like automatons, which is bad for art/artists: "Kingmakers have been so steadily undermined that... the revolution has been won—the audience is in charge. And what the audience wants to do, at mass scale, is scroll."

My pals at @spectrumculture.bsky.social published their list of the year's best films (so far), and I wrote up the grimly funny political allegory Two Prosecutors. You can stream it right now on Criterion Channel! spectrumculture.com/2026/07/05/t...

If you’re unsure whether to support England or Mexico in today’s World Cup match, I highly recommend watching the “Mexico Week” episode of Great British Bake-off. Once you hear Paul Hollywood pronounce the word “taco,” you’ll want our neighbors to the south to crush the entire damn Empire.

Scene report: I am in Loudoun County, Virginia, where the heat wave broke after a storm hit. It’s actually kind of pleasant and in the 70s. Bonus: I just saw a groundhog bust ass to hide from me at my Airbnb. Cc @capitalweather.com

I went with almost cusper Gen X nerd.

Today’s t-shirt feels appropriate. DC is in distress y’all.

Starting my Fourth by watching the hurricane shark attack movie, just like the Founders would have wanted.

Films that best encapsulate America, ranked: 1. Ace in the Hole 2. Nashville 3. A Face in the Crowd 4. Do the Right Thing 5. Unforgiven 6. Boogie Nights 7. JFK 8. Dog Day Afternoon 9. Blazing Saddles 10. Fargo 11. The Last Picture Show 12. Clueless 13. Oppenheimer 14. Spring Breakers 15. Casino

I am glad to be in Loudoun County Virginia this weekend, where it’s still insanely hot but at least relatively peaceful. Going to tour local breweries and distilleries this afternoon.

The Invite is better than I expected, a sex comedy that uses your quick judgement of the characters as a bait and switch so that you’re disarmed when they talk about their pain in bracing ways. My @spectrumculture.bsky.social review.

What are you ordering from the heavy metal brewery?

After Lockbox, I am ready to rule that no good movies are based on a podcast. My @spectrumculture.bsky.social review.

Are you in DC and not sure what to do tomorrow night? I can recommend Cherub Tree enough. The “bubblegrunge” group has their record release show at Pie Shop. My @wcp.bsky.social write up.

Bioshock. You think you have agency, then you realize you're a violent puppet for an insane industrialist who thinks you're *LITERALLY* a NPC.

Great choices in this article. I think I would have gone with Ace in the Hole or A Face in the Crowd.

I think about this beautiful drunk idiot every time England plays the World Cup. Maybe he has a partner and children by now.

Google Reader was maybe the best social media network I ever used, and save for times where band portmanteau threads get out of control, it's been a steady decline ever since.

Some DC events I attended that were better attended than this: -comedy open mic nights -hastily put together bar trivia -punk shows at libraries -Glenn Greenwald debates at the CATO Institute (before he went nuts) -my wedding -party I co-hosted last Saturday -brunch potluck during a blizzard

yeah I saw a horseshoe crab *lowers shades to look you dead in the eye* cum once

Look I am stoked to see film like this do well, and this is no small feat, but if you’re talking about global grosses, and you are when you use worldwide numbers, this isn’t true.

Some festival circuit titles to keep on your radar: -Josephine -Once Upon a Time in Harlem -The Last First: Winter K2 -Amazomania -Union County I didn't make it to Cannes this year - maybe I will one year - but my critic colleagues who did have plenty of dispatches to heighten your excitement.

My top films of the year (so far) and where to find them. Some notes: 1. Features only. 2. No festival premieres unless they are widely available through other means. 3. I included some of last year's festival premieres this year for that concurrent reason. 4. Good year so far!

Today I saw the vanity plate “U FARTD” and I deeply regret not getting a photo.

I am at my mom’s house this afternoon, so I’m hanging out with her dog Lucy.

I liked Couture, a rare opportunity nowadays to see Angelina Jolie play a mostly normal person! It is also a fascinating insidery look at Paris Fashion Week. My @spectrumculture.bsky.social review.

This is pathetic. I started losing my hair as a teenager, and I have been bald for decades. Being bald is not a fucking identity.

I’m adding it to my bingo card.

Holy shit, Mel Brooks turns 100 today. Hard to put into words what he means to me. I’ll just say Dracula Dead and Loving It is better than its reputation.

Dumb post. Anyway, here are some good old comedies: This Is Spinal Tap What’s Up Doc? The Thin Man Monty Python and the Holy Grail Arsenic and Old Lace Repo Man The Jerk The Apartment Being There Trading Places Singin in the Rain The General City Lights Duck Soup MASH Tootsie A New Leaf

You’re right to loathe them. They’re anti-art philistines who almost single-handedly lowered cultural standards worldwide. They should have stuck to sitcoms.

So many dorks are upset that Grand Theft Auto VI, arguably the most anticipated game of all time, has a base retail price of $80. In today’s dollars, N64 games in the late 1990s were much pricier (I know because I paid for them). These entitled brats don’t know how good they’ve got it.

When I stop thinking Jackass is funny, it will be the start of death.

Underrated moment from the Jackass movies: they shove a trumpet up some dude’s ass and right before he farts, Pontius deadpans “We’re bringing jazz back to the working man.”

Secret Mall Apartment is streaming on Netflix.

Gee, I can't imagine why Nolan wouldn't want instant social media reactions to his new movie.

Quite a contrast in these first two replies. If I had the option, I will always prefer to read by work by writers who share Sasha's view of editors, rather than Steven's.

Weird Nightmare put on a fun, punchy set last night to a crowd of maybe 50 people, mostly friends and family of the opening act. They might be the best new(ish) band no one is listening to.

It occurred to me when I saw Jackass Forever that it's become an unintentional longitudinal study, and it's nice to see Alissa articulate the value in that.

Reading Our Band Could Be Your Life and taking issue with the Minor Threat chapter: “after all, if it could be done in sterile Washington, D.C., it could be done anywhere.” Dude, DC was not sterile in 1981.

I know exactly what Richard means. It was in the middle of the screening for Black Panther: Wakanda Forever - which was supposedly one of the good ones - where I found myself thinking, "I can't keep going this to myself." I haven't reviewed a superhero film since.

It would be great if my excitement didn't manifest itself as anxiety. "Oh, you're looking forward to something? Guess what, you have to deal with a week of certainity you don't deserve it or it will go poorly, so when it comes, you may lack the ability to enjoy it anymore." Fuck you, brain.

Two new trailers dropped this afternoon: -The Samurai and the Prisoner (feudal Japan riff on a Holmes/Watson mystery) -The Weight (Depression-era riff on The Wages of Fear) It's like the distributors conspired to answer Area Dads who complain they don't make movies like they used to anymore.

Remember this part of Groundhog Day? Of course you do! Rose of Nevada is like a time loop movie from Gus and Ralph's perspective, except prettier to look at and not nearly as funny.