i can be trusted with vintage typography equipment

Hey Google - how can I have a life worth living if I'm working two full-time jobs Oh

Good morning to Brazilian reporter Manuela Borges, who’s been waiting eleven years for this petty moment. ❤️ 🇧🇷

Astronaut Hates Long Nightly Spacewalk To ISS Outhouse https://theonion.com/astronaut-hates-long-nightly-spacewalk-to-iss-outhouse/

Chat is this a good list of countries to be with on social issues?

ADF advertising never fails

Ancient NSW mythology tells us that at the passing of a Premier, their soul was escorted through the underworld and brought before the god Icac, who would weigh their corruption against a bottle of Penfolds

Is now the time we start to posit that Dutton was a long play, left wing deep cover op to completely hobble the functional right wing for a decade, costing them even the one tightly held public image they kept through any change in popularity?

I misread this image so badly that I can only really hope to illustrate what I saw. ( Also a good excuse for an #art study )

"there are no third spaces anymore" wrong. blast furnace

maybe i am going insane

Amazing how this new social media/mobile phone attention span effect is now spreading backwards in time

The doctors remain baffled as to how a form of oral cancer found only in the mouths of farm animals has metastasised in his prostate

Gender is a spectrum from just wanting have fun to being back in town, and to varying degrees, each of us contains attributes of both, which is a beautiful thing

I once knew a Federal bank examiner, and one time someone asked him why we had to KEEP inspecting banks over and over. He basically said every new batch of business school grads invents bank fraud from first principles.

This is a very American F1 production (derogatory)

Further proving that good Head will beat a bad Root every time

Travis Head getting his century off 69 balls instead of 67 as a mark of respect to the millenials

I believe they prefer to be called Americans

Petition to eliminate Perth forever. What's a test match?

Leo has been on fire with the takes recently

What country is Vienna in, ho?

Don Furner may be the dumbest man in rugby league, which is saying a lot

God damn Tim Onion, cook

I would like to toast whoever came up with this concept. In fact I have a cask of fine Amontillado in my cellar for the occasion, come, I'd like to show it to you...

It's true

Kweev clean sheet and Ronaldo sent off? Perfection.

Death to the Internal Combustion Engine

No more. Just... no more.

SKA POPE SKA POPE SKA POPE SKA POPE SKA POPE SKA POPE SKA POPE SKA POPE SKA POPE SKA POPE SKA POPE SKA POPE SKA POPE SKA POPE SKA POPE SKA POPE SKA POPE SKA POPE

Call me when I can get Steam on my Xbox tbh

Begrudgingly: a good use for LLMs

Minns:

my new AI powered lamp is trained on millions of lamp interactions so it understands that 50% of chain pulls are to turn it on and the other 50% are to turn it off. and honestly, it's a little spooky how it knows exactly what i want almost half of the time

Me when talking to old school Man City fans

Note for every single city, state, province, country on earth: there have been low tax/tax free alternatives to your location for decades. The people/companies domiciled in you had a choice of lower taxes already. Tax as you need, to be the place you want to be. Empty threats don't matter.

‘Shut Up, Mother! Shut Up!’ Pleads George W. Bush To Dick Cheney Skeleton Dressed In Suit https://theonion.com/shut-up-mother-shut-up-pleads-george-w-bush-to-dick-cheney-skeleton-dressed-in-suit/

Believed I had tickets to the concert tonight but turned up and it was just some guy playing tunes out of his Mitsubishi. So I didn't see Oasis, it was just a Mirage

No one respects your time less than medical offices

Every year we get closer to this happening on the news

french queer eye is called Homme Improvement

nancy reagan welcoming dick cheney to hell

From a Ska perspective, we have Kill Lincoln, Catbite, The Toasters and The Mighty Mighty Bosstones. A very tough choice.

A Dershowitz bag lunch special capping a day that started with Cheney dying and saw Mamdani win would have to go down as the first good day of year

Xabi with another classic late yellow at Anfield

Singing Ste Gerrard and Andy Robertson after Trent comes on. You weren't our greatest scouser and you weren't our greatest fullback. Brutal.