Driverless cars are out here pulling U-turns, cops don’t know who to ticket, and @michaelgerber.bsky.social is hiding behind a hedge in Santa Monica. Read his new piece, Waymo Scared: online.americanbystander.org/waymo-scared/

TERFs are obsessed with where *everyone else* is going to the bathroom, so we wrote them a potty training book to teach them how to mind their own damn business. It's called "Nobody Poops." Read it here... and see it in print in the next issue of @americanbystander.bsky.social. #transrights

And if you like my writing, none of my graphic novels have been published yet... but consider checking out some of my work for MAD Magazine or this new piece in the @americanbystander.bsky.social. (12/X) bsky.app/profile/matt...

ATTN @americanbystander.bsky.social and Dutchie

. @michaelgerber.bsky.social ‘s new essay in the wake of Jimmy Kimmel’s cancellation lays it out plainly: the U.S. government is now hostile to comedy. Artists need to protect their lists, mirror their work, and prepare for independence. Read and repost.

Support independent media

ooooh ok so no more comedy allowed, cool cool cool

Good time to repost this

Well, its what Charlie Kirk would’ve wanted, at least

Corporations should not own comedy. #jimmykimmel

We stand with Jimmy Kimmel.

The Roman Empire never really fell it just pivoted to content

Remember when you were in the Gifted Program? Now you’re just in debt. The American Bystander: The Official Magazine for Former Gifted Kids Preorder Issue 31: theamericanbystanderstore.com/products/iss...

Done and done, who’s next

Now that we’re online again, who should we be following? (No losers, only cool people)

[opens trench coat] “Psst. Hey you. Hey buddy. C’mere. Wanna buy some print media?”

[Throws up another skull.]

I'm funny how, like a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh? Is that last thing I said funny? No? How about this one? Please laugh.

It’s actually not that hard to be successful online. You just have to be obsessive, unbalanced or stupid hot. Thankfully we’re all three

Everyone’s so happy we’re back on social media. It feels like walking into the old bar and all your alkie friends cheering, “YOU’RE BACK!!!” Anyway, pre-order Issue #31. Cover by @tbtoro.bsky.social Ships October 2025 Link——> theamericanbystanderstore.com/products/iss...

Christ, this is terrible how have you guys been doing this

We tried to claw our way out because social media is hell. But, like all the damned, we were dragged back—this time to hawk a print mag. The American Bystander #31 Cover by @tbtoro.bsky.social. Ships October 2025. Preorder here: theamericanbystanderstore.com/products/iss...

Ross MacDonald for @americanbystander.bsky.social -- online.americanbystander.org/this-is-fine/

We almost escaped, alas...

Hooooorah, 'The American Bystander' makes a timely return...at times like this we need more humour...or even humor.🎉🍾🥳

From the files @americanbystander.bsky.social: The Pope’s Greatest Open Mic one liners by me online.americanbystander.org/the-popes-gr...

After months of being chained to my desk, deadlines, illness, bereavement, lawyers, guns, and money, I’m finally able to dig in to the latest issue of @americanbystander.bsky.social. A clever line from @jamesfinngarner.bsky.social made me do a spit take into the pool. THX @michaelgerber.bsky.social

My drawing in the latest issue of the American Bystander. Thanks to @michaelgerber.bsky.social @americanbystander.bsky.social #art #drawing

“Half-Staff” 🇺🇸🌗 My cover for the new issue of @americanbystander.bsky.social !

We regret to inform you we have returned to social media. Sorry.

I am very excited for people to read my story "Yoinlax the Zewd," along with the latest batch of unsettling photo captions.

@americanbystander.bsky.social’s Barry Blitt sums it up perfectly.

Glenn's right. We'll be moving all @americanbystander.bsky.social contact off Substack this year.

Publishing @americanbystander.bsky.social #29 will put CA over the top

I HAVE FOUND OUR NEW OFFICES @americanbystander.bsky.social

I just donated to @americanbystander.bsky.social not just because I’m loopy on antibiotics and cough medicine, just because. You should too. mailchi.mp/bf8df4565026...

Have you ever wanted something so badly that you almost gave up hope and then–suddenly, when you'd almost resigned yourself to the impossibility of it–it happened? Anyway here's Issue 29, available now for pre-order: theamericanbystanderstore.com/products/the...

DOOOOO ITTTTTT!!!!

I'm not saying reading The American Bystander makes you more cultured, but I'm saying I'm preparing a wine pairing guide for each of our back issues.

at least its honest #npsky

Welcome aboard (to BlueSky, and to the quandary of existence itself)

Share this post and you'll get nothing, except a warm feeling in your belly that comes over you when you've done your good deed for the day.

You may think our decision to become a nonprofit was inspired by our commitment to the arts. Actually, it’s because we wanted a fancier way to say, ‘Please help, we’re broke.’ www.flipcause.com/secure/cause...

As Publisher of this comedy magazine, I can tell you that after ten years, we were not just losing money, but had achieved "anti-profit," a quantum state where any contact with capitalism would cause our entire reality to annihilate itself (in a bad way). So: go make a donation!

Breaking news: The American Bystander is now a nonprofit! Turns out, publishing a humor magazine in 2024 was already the most nonprofit thing we could do. Donate here and support print media: www.flipcause.com/secure/cause...