Alex Jones tosses and turns at night. He can’t sleep. In a cold sweat, he throws off the covers. He’s seen this in his nightmares one too many times. He’s got to warn the people. They’ve done it, this time. They’ve…turned the clouds gay.

Half day at work today. Let's see what kinda trouble I can find with all the extra time I have this afternoon 😈

hoochie daeddy

oh no. ffxiv is finally getting beastmaster, it might be time to finally renew. anybody know any fun, somewhat active/social FCs recruiting?

50mg 🍃seltzer followed by this 6 pack of local craft cherry ale got me feelin like

ALIKE IN DIGNITY

Wesker to Chris:

sloppppppy head. reblog if u agree

need some bros to send me explicit pics so we can talk about all the horny shit we wanna do to each other 🤤

If you’d like to grab deez cheeks then you should repost them so I know who wants to 😜

keep forgetting the new Noah Kahan album drops this week. I'm not remotely emotionally prepared yet

I'm so excited for the clayface movie. I'm ready to see them do something new with "superhero movies"

crossfade got me like

well now that I'm back home and done being a responsible adult, it's time to take a fistful of edibles

edible + double batch of Kraft Mac and cheese + new episode of critical role = me rn 😎

detroit style deep dish incoming

I'm required to take PTO of at least 5 consecutive days once a year, minimum. So yes.

oops. spent $200 at the lego store on accident. happy birthday to me I guess

Eating edibles until I’m no longer attached to the present.

I like the word “queer” because it captures how i’m also weird af in ways that have nothing to do with gender or sexuality

hot take, but the anime remake we need isn't soul eater, it's Zatch Bell

Christopher Meloni in Wet Hot American Summer. That’s it, that’s the post

Remember, this is who died for your sins of having stuff up your butt. 😘

Have you heard the Good News?

in honor of goon friday yesterday, I got way too ✝️faded. it was much needed after this week

I am so sorry to all the soul eater fans, but the fire force manga also ended saying "next is soul world." the anime wasn't confirming a remake

dum pup’s frisky 🔁 play with my bush ♥️ take me walkies 💬 tell me

Aries season + a lunch consisting of zoloft and cold brew = me ready to FUCKIN PARTY

wild choice to make Tamaki's fan service relavant to the plot in Fire Force, but I'm here for it 😂

Okay, one good April fools post so far

in bed sick now. who's gonna be a bro and come over and nurse back to health (slutty nurse costume required)

can I pet that HAWG?

I hate the start of Aries season. I get feverish and lightly sick every year. Pretty sure it's a side effect from the hellfire in my spirit being refueled.

OBSESSED with her

I need to sloppily make out with someone in the corner of a dive bar ASAP

I've lost 20 pounds this month... Goddamn

okay, surprise second raise for this year. I'll take it 💵 💵 💵

me and whomst?

look man harry potter just meant a lot to me as a kid. it taught me important lessons, like how being fat is bad, being a woman with masculine features is bad, systemic oppression is fine, trying to fight against systemic oppression is cringe, and that everyone should grow up to be a cop

Oh hell yeah

Quote with your favourite animal Binturongs!

AI is dying RT to make it die faster.

I don't know what I was expecting out of the CSM final chapter, but I don't think that was it at all. And I'm not sure how I feel about it yet... 🤔

Drop a movie that traumatized you as a kid.