This is Bolt. He just learned how to speak. Thinks it works best when he uses his whole body. 12/10 (TT: gavi_570)

Dear Diary, I enjoyed reading the news when I woke up today.

The #BlueJays just jolted the MLB offseason to life. Early thoughts on the 7-year, $210 million deal for Dylan Cease with much more to come: www.mlb.com/bluejays/new...

$65B (billion) of healthcare funding in Ontario has gone missing. Over five years, at least. The Auditor General has no idea where it went, so it wasn't audited. Oh, you didn't know? That's #CdnMediaColludes doing a good job. www.corruptario.ca/what-the-ags...

Went for a glorious 10k ride at 4 this morning but it felt like it was probably the last comfortable ride, weather-wise, for a very long time. Wind warnings, snow, polar vortex, oh my 🫤

How does anyone get attacked by a shark, can't they hear the music

just sayin i've never seen anybody in a jeep doin any wranglin

Pestering someone to literal death is called annoyhilation.

Moron

one of the coolest things about ChatGPT is how you can actually just never use it. you can fill your whole entire life with simply not once using it. it's incredible.

All of this pie talk compelled me to buy The West Wing box set. IYKYK

Toaster. The future is delicious.

guys i dont think i defrosted my turkey right

My microwave sings a little song when my Hot Pocket is done. Should it have the right to vote?

And instead of hanging around here trying to make your taxpayer’s voice heard why don’t you get off your ass, buddy, and go apply for a Skills Development Fund grant like all my hardworking friends do!!

This is the way you get those tourists back. Yep. "starting in 2026 visitors from abroad will have to pay US$100 on top of the individual park fee to enter 11 of the most popular destinations in the system."

I've switched up my back, arms and shoulders workout and it must be working because they all collectively and simultaneously HATE ME

A bad day for Canada, and therefore the world. Ontario (population 16 million, 40% of the country) has passed new legislation prohibiting bike lanes that take a lane from cars. An escalation from Bill 212, which required municipalities to get approval.

Realizing a gaff and deleting within two minutes is a fun adrenaline rush when you're struggling to feel anything

maybe i am going insane

I want to love Down Cemetery Road, but Sarah is such an oblivious knob that I spend half my time wanting to throttle the stupidity out of her 🤦‍♀️

I finally watched the season 4 finale of The Morning Show and it was INCREDIBLE. Didn't take a full breath until the credits!

everyone who spent the 90s laboriously and lovingly making mixtapes just dissolved into ancient dust

why are they called eyelids when skindows was right there

Many say they want the hooba, and then complain about the stank.

Overheard today: ▪️“How come John Lennon and Yoko Ono got to sit in bed for peace and we need to dry wall?” ▪️“I was told this would be fun”. Only joking. Our volunteers are in good spirits. Donate to fund the renovations: www.canadahelps.org/en/charities...

I don't deny that dogs can sometimes be quite lovely but what I will say is I don't trust their opinions. If a cat recommended me an album it had bought, I'd totally check it out. If a dog did the same, I'd promise to listen to the album, out of politeness, with no intention of actually doing so

Scared my postman by going to the door naked. Not sure what frightened him most, me being naked or the fact that I knew where he lived.

it feels very rewarding to be loved by a cat

Abortion is healthcare. That’s how Canada treats it. It’s the correct position to take. #ableg #cdnpoli

is there a place where we can lay down and eat cheese? -first day at work, orientation question

Negotiations Update: Agreements in Principle with Canada Post Reached for Both Bargaining Units https://www.cupw.ca/en/negotiations-update-agreements-principle-canada-post-reached-both-bargaining-units #SupportCUPW #canlab #cdnpoli @CanadianLabour

Massive shoutout out to whoever handles the Royal Canadian Air Force’s social media account. They responded to every single comment on their already very solid Trans Day of Remembrance post and they responded like this…

I've had a missile blow up next to my airplane, been shot at dozens of times by anti-aircraft fire, and launched into orbit — all for my country. I never thought I'd see a President call for my execution. Trump doesn’t understand the Constitution, and we're all less safe for it.

Every time I read about the Canadian government's new volunteer military, a little voice whispers "the first step to conscription" and my anxiety wills me to rail optimism at my doomonic ancestors but then I remember I'm just here to outlive my cat 🐾

is it even still a "WIP" if the last time i worked on it was more than 6 months ago?

My work anxiety is teaming up with my money anxiety and my health anxiety and they've just stopped to pick up my holiday anxiety and they're all on their way to party with my insomnia

Have Your Say on the Situation at Canada Post https://www.cupw.ca/en/have-your-say-situation-canada-post #HandsOffMyPostOffice

Air fryer, no foil needed, wash the plate

If you see this, post your getaway vehicle.

Can’t believe the whole country has to suffer through the return of Dickensian childhood diseases because the worst, most ignorant attention-demanders decided other people’s expertise makes them feel bad

Not only did the Black Friday sales start really really early in Canada this year, but it seems like all of the stores are getting it wrong. The price drop percentages are supposed to START at 35%, not max out there.

Black Phone 3 gonna have a beeper or some shit

Boy, it sure is a mystery. 🤔 [They tend to be cheaper. According to one study, ultra-processed food costs about 55¢ per 100 calories, while unprocessed foods cost almost triple that for the same caloric value. Also, they are easier to prepare and shelf-stable.] www.cbc.ca/news/health/...

The observatory closed too early in their opinion

I really hate it when scientists keep saying that “we need to rebuild trust in science,” because it implies that scientists are to blame for the mistrust rather than the millions of dollars of dark money that have funded political attacks on science in order to advance a far right agenda.

The fact that the Louvre heist didn’t take place at dawn, but at the very reasonable hour of 9:30 a.m. shows that even French jewel thieves have a better work-life balance than us.

States that have run ads in Canada, interfering in our domestic politics: CA, FL, IL, NY, MT, VA, MA, VT.