I just found out last night that the $50k enrollment bonus only pays out after 5 years of service, and reader, the laugh I let out when I read that woke the dog from across the house. These absolute fucking grapes aren't seeing a dime of that money. No way they can ride out 5 years of this job.

I'm a 63 year old white guy. I don't even know what this means.

What he said: 💯 🎯

Epstein: I’m best friends with this pedo running for President, here’s a bunch of stories about how big a pedo he is NYT: but her emails

Get well, Mr. Mayor. Whoever did this is dethpicable.

1939

That last one is the dealbreaker.

@skeetofgod.bsky.social is this an authorized biography?

If it's not fully setting in how ominous this is, try reading it this way:

Starring Ted Nugent.

Let this sink in.

@michaelkosta.bsky.social enjoyed you on @lebatardshow.bsky.social Pre-ordered your book not just because it sounds interesting, but also because of the slapdick reference.

🚨HOLY COW: President Trump announces he will be REMOVING ALL golden retrievers that are currently playing basketball on NBA rosters.

Dear manager, This week I 1. Was a puppet 2. A pauper 3. A Pirate 4. A Poet 5. A pawn and a king

Lmaooooooooooo

Good day to post this classic Kids In The Hall Sketch, I guess dai.ly/x2yrhiu

A 57,000 square foot Temu warehouse in China went up in flames today. The total loss of inventory has been estimated to be as high as $56.19 USD.

Without downloading any new pics, what's your energy going into 2025?

I bought my wife an O. Henry book for Christmas and it turns out she just sold her eyes.

here's what we know so far: a teenager obtained a weapon, just as our founders intended, and took that weapon into a school, just as our founders intended, and shot and killed a teacher and a student, just as our founders intended, and ended up dead, just as our founders intended

Imagine you're trying to get the toughest military job in America .... ...and you're against women in combat... ...and you're sending your mom out to fight your battles for you.

@kimarnett.bsky.social Hi, Honey!

@mikeryanruiz.bsky.social @lebatardshow.bsky.social

It is refreshing to be able to scroll through a timeline without having to stop and block an ad every third post