My wife is getting gender affirming surgery in 5 days if you can repost this and / or donate that would help her immensely! #transawarenessweek

Quote my wife, "at least somewhere should have a good mayor" cc:Ken Sim

I haven't seen a squirrel in days

Looks like I need some grave dancing shoes

Thanks Doug Ford!

I will keep saying this, because it's going to be truer and truer: If you want a 100 percent non AI experience, go to a show. Any given night there's something going on.

Seriously everyone.

Jimmy Fallon is, was and always will be a fair weather clown.

At least Fallon will stand up for what's right

ATTENTION: VANCOUVER Following my triumphant run at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, I am coming to the Little Mountain Gallery on October 15. This will be my first time in VAN, and I am excited to go nuts on stage, west-coast style. Poster: @mrnastynodrama.bsky.social Tickets: tinyurl.com/3k2f69m8

Someone do a Lex Luthor to Dean Cain

This is an absolute horror show

Yes, this Epstein thing will bring down the president, just like all the other stuff has

my only goal now is to live longer than him

This’ll win Rogan back www.bbc.com/news/article...

I really don’t get why artists are fearing AI, it’s going to free up so much time for artists that don’t have to make art now.

This guy wanted to lead this country

All my biggest fantasies involve throwing someone’s phone into the street.

Marines Raise American Flag Outside Cell Phone Store After Defeating Skateboarding Teenagers theonion.com/marines...

This all seems like it might besmirch the good name of the LAPD.

I love how people who are trying to automate everything with AI say "it will leave people time to pursue their passions" such as finding shelter because you have no money and society is still based on money. My true passion.

When did we stop using the term couch potato?

Vancouver get your whole ass in gear. This will be thrdeparture point from which you become a better person.

Whoa, big news day.

This man is a national hero

Seriously though, if you are worried about AI killing art, go see something live. Go to a gallery. Watch a band or a comedian or something. Go Can't fake that real live experience. Also this is tonight. www.showpass.com/the-laugh-ga...

Ok, but for real. Tonight's Laugh Gallery is the perfect way to cap off this lovely day. Tonight 7:30 pm. www.showpass.com/the-laugh-ga...

Laugh Gallery at LMG 7:30 pm Thursday. Be at home in bed by 10.

Do you want to read the lyrics to Dr Phil’s sons’s band’s song “I feel like sex”

If I watch @grahamclark.bsky.social’s 24 hour stand-up this Friday/Saturday and immediately follow it with @chrisgeth.bsky.social’s 24 hour marathon, would that make me a two-time winner?

Some light reading. www.straight.com/music/whats-...

The legendary @grahamclark.bsky.social is doing 24 hours of stand-up May 23 and 24, and I'm going to be doing some writing for him (sorry in advance, Graham)! Don't miss it! More information right here: www.showpass.com/graham-clark...

When a young comedian asks me for any advice I always tell them the same thing: make sure to start your own liquor brand

Can't see any conflict here

My fellow Blue Sky members, I cannot express how much fun this 24 Hour Show is going to be. I wish very much for you to see it. www.showpass.com/graham-clark...

American pope! Stay away from meeee!

We should just put him in the NBA slam dunk competition, he's going to blow everyone away.

Everyone should go out and vote, they give you free champagne at the end.

Right now there’s probably someone talking about how much they love you…or hate you, but still

America: why do you have that politician who's always wearing hoodie?

The #1 comedy podcast about horses (Retail Nightmares) is back for one episode! If my fundraiser reaches its goal we’ll make another one :) @aliciatobin.bsky.social @energyslime.bsky.social @grahamclark.bsky.social retailnightmares.com

Thursday is the new Friday. Come on down. You're worth it. www.showpass.com/the-laugh-ga...

But I just saw him dancing by the pool with his shades on. www.ctvnews.ca/entertainmen...

It's crazy that Elon used to look kind of weird and with a little work, now he's panty-droppingly hot.

Q: What is Nicholas Cage's favourite food? A: Captain Corelli's peanut butter and jelly

The one time I performed in the New York subway station with Jimmy Fallon is still only at like 63 views

I wish I lived in Roku City

Remember when Jack Black threw his best friend under the bus for making fun of Trump. V cool imho

Val Kilmer killing it in Top Secret (and yes that is him singing). RIP www.youtube.com/watch?v=q6XI...