I will hand a Peabody Award to anybody who writes a streaming limited series without flashbacks, jumpbacks after an in medias res opening, or parallel timelines.

Gene would have been so pissed about this

@dennycarter.bsky.social Adjust the ranks?

The context here is that Gruyère cheese sponsors the World Curling championships and you get a huge brick of cheese for medaling

The Royals are going to make Carter Jensen wear an alarm clock around his neck like Flavor Flav.

Thanks to @royalsjun.bsky.social, the comparison has been completed.

The Tragedy, by Pablo Picasso, 1903, 📸 by @JasonHannaphoto

Ryan Lefebvre pulling DEEP into his bag of anecdotes tonight.

@dszymborski.fangraphs.com knows that despair

Salvy teaching Doug Eddings the bottom of the strike zone. Over and Over and Over again. But Eddings refuses to learn. 😂

Padres sold for $800M in 2012

charles always because he’s never lied about his lack of knowledge

Might be the greatest opening paragraph of anything ever.

This is a perfect encapsulation of the early 00s. I had a jacket just like that. Almost every guy did. There's no way you could know for sure who in a bar was a drug dealer, an undercover cop, or a regular 20-something idiot like me who thought ordering bottled beer instead of draft was classier.

@davidjroth.bsky.social Looks ready to make some ears bleed on the boardwalk with his whistle. Those longhairs don't know what's coming.

Salvy is retiring only one way and that is with both knees falling off while catching a meaningless September game in Cleveland.

we're long past the inflection point there but as @sheehannewsletter.bsky.social always says, the sports with salary caps are the sports where the union broke

One of my all time favorite stories is when my friend got excited about getting Red Hot Chili Peppers tickets only to realize he had spent like $150 on two tickets to see the Red Hot Chili Pipers and was madder than I've ever seen him before or since

Can I interest you in a Billiken? defector.com/can-i-intere...

Greatest thing I’ve seen today

Owen Friend, 1969 #Royals (age 42) #Baseball

Earl the Pearle

Laker Fans Furious As Bam Adebayo Dies In Even Worse Helicopter Crash

Just got this. It's back.

@thepressbox.bsky.social Do we have a contender here for the lowest stakes ever in a breaking of silence?

Teams in the top six conferences refusing to play the good teams in the next 12 conferences and then blaming those teams for having bad schedules is nasty work.

WELL THEY BLEW UP JABBA THE HUTT IN TATOOINE LAST NIGHT NOW THEY BLEW UP HIS BARGE TOO

@davidjroth.bsky.social Is "Rotta" close enough to "Ratto" that Defector could convince Ray to see the movie and write about it?

1. Hartford Whalers 2. Brewers old glove logo 3. St. Louis University Billiken

Every restaurant with these

No cheating; your last saved picture of a celebrity is your therapist. ("YOU'LL GET NOTHING AND LIKE IT!" would be a very appropriate therapy approach for the current moment, a massive self-help bestseller.)

I was hangry at Midway wandering through the concourse tonight when a Mr. Beef appeared out of nowhere, like an oasis in the desert. Apparently, it opened about 10 days ago, in time to save me.

Here we go again. "We need a salary cap because then we'll finally have the competitive balance that other leagues have but is missing in MLB." Updated these numbers...

Today would be a great day to leak the net revenue sharing transfers for the last ten years, so people can understand just how much money some teams are sharing and how much money many owners are just pocketing. MLB protects this information because your ignorance benefits them.

this is an absolutely infuriating angle to take in this situation. why is it on the union to find creative solutions to ownership problems, exactly? why is it on the union to save owners from themselves when it comes to sacrificing games?

If they're not re-enacting this every year, what are they even doing?

Carter Jensen: 15 Blake Mitchell: 96

lol -- when the "salary cap" people want you to believe the cap matters, they say, "You can't cut Tyreek Hill! That's a $28m dead money hit!" And then when Tyreek Hill gets cut, they say, "Wow, they saved $22.8m against the cap!" 🧢 🟰 💩