This is the plot of animorphs

every wiki article about classic UK comedy like "Father and Sons was a comedy duo comprised of Reg Father and Tommy Sons, who appeared on a record breaking 18,450 episodes of The Light Applause Hour. Reg Father died in 1988 of Cigarette Fever. Tommy Sons remains alive in prison since 1997"

Yoda is actually tall

I’m just trying to look up the meaning of la plancha, Google, I do not need this shit right now

God could never forgive how far down my ear I shove a qtip

Eat shit, wordle, yes it is

I’m the last native speaker of Simlish

I solve 55% of my problems by just going to bed.

A girl rat is a raccoon

BATMAN: smallville? thank god you got out of there SUPERMAN: they are pig people bruce

Hocus Pocus 2 Toxic Yuri

I do not support the troops and i'm happy that they're forced to eat dog food with giraffe tongue and carrots

Të gjithë ata që më urrejnë bëhen kamerierët e mi kur ulem në tryezën e suksesit.

Nothing is more embarrassing than someone online that is obsessed with dunking on “the mods.” I understand having individual grudges but it’s pretty telling that the biggest villains in your life are the people telling you you can’t post marmaduke comics in the heathcliffe subreddit

Remember, it’s only ethical to jerk off to show Anissa, and only until season 5 #Invincible

happy anniversary to those who celebrate

I would have watched more King of The Hill if I knew Hank gets pegged

Almond joie de vivre

Kids these days don’t appreciate classical music youtu.be/lLz8UN-YyRE?...

me and all the other guys who got our first HJ to drops of Jupiter about to go get our bad knees blown off for Israel

Virgil Finlay, Astral Man, 1963

the human body was not designed to know what the worst person in the world is doing every fifteen minutes

*Mulder throws her a file* Ever heard of the psychic rape beam alien?

David Grove

You reap the feed you sow, I suppose.

The foundation of American fascism rests on three things: extreme bigotry, whining about other people's coffee orders, and saying "so much for global warming" whenever it's cold out

BRB going to war in the oil producing region of the world while also declaring procedural war on green energy 😎

it's kind of crazy how thoroughly a cute guy saying "i'm your puppy and tequila is my kibble" destroys my inhibitions lmao

“So successful”

Retsu died how he lived: embarrassing himself in public #Baki

hey, remember when the transphobes started coming for gender-affirming care for minors and it was framed as “concern for children” and trans folks said “lol they just want us to not exist” and our society full of rubes and people with turnips for brains took the transphobes’ arguments at face value

SAM: i don't think this movie is STARRING anyone CHATGPT CROW T ROBOT: Sure, I can help you with that. Cave Dwellers, also known as The Blade Master, stars Miles O'Keefe, SAM (genuine): wow that's a lot of keefe CHATGPT TOM SERVO (same voice as Crow): Oops, seems you've misunderstood. Actor Miles O'

You just know that “Did Women Ruin the Workplace?” bit would have done NUMBERS in this little clique