2026 is beautiful because we got to go from a secret cabal of billionaire pedophiles running the world to a public cabal of billionaire pedophiles running the world that's progress we can all believe in

Oh Gaiman's back. I'll wait for someone with more energy to sift through the investigation he's posted in his defence and they can let us know if it's worth it.

Amazing coda here.

I suspect this entirely the fault of Daphne in Frasier.

This is just lazy scriptwriting

remember when the panama papers came out and we found out every rich person on earth was committing tax fraud and then nothing happened

THREAD. My parents' cat Bridget vanished. As the weeks dragged on they became ever more worried, so to distract himself my dad began to paint Bridget's adventures, imagining her travelling through time and popping up at some of art & music's most important moments. I've collected his work here...

Conspiracy theorists thought the rich were using phrases like "cheese pizza" to disguise their deprived sex acts but all this time they were just emailing "yo Jeff, got any space on KidFuck Island this weekend?"

Elon Musk publicly slandering that cave diver as a "pedo guy" after he begged Jeffrey Epstein for island party invites is just incredible

It’s like a monkey paw wish. “There is a cabal of billionaire pedophiles, and Donald Trump is the only one who will expose them” and they were right about both things.

Catherine! :(

This isn't very encouraging for the government's plan to replace tutors for kids with AI.

Just following orders is it?

I'm sorry, but the reaction to Brianna Ghey being murdered by people she knew offline *because she was transgender* becoming 'we should stop teenagers from being on social media' rather than 'we should deal with the recent horrifying rise of transphobia in the UK' is unbelievably fucking bullshit.

Inexplicably our cinema is showing Melania. Checked the available showings, 2 and 4 seats sold for the two Friday showings, none for the one on Saturday, two for the one on Sunday. That's 8 seats too many.

I'm now an influencer. Can't wait for all the free cars and holidays.

Everyone's getting in on the action! You simply can't get better press coverage than "we've never heard of it until now", thanks Metro! 💜 (thanks @euclidianboxes.bsky.social!)

HT @brianbutterfield.bsky.social

So anyway, Andrew Wakefield should be in prison for the rest of his life.

You'd think all those cognitive tests they keep making him take would have picked it up.

a Ship of Feceus, if you will

I know you shouldn't yuck someone's yum, but this is the worst fess I've read.

Nine years to the day since Graham Linehan foresaw his own fate.

The only watch any normal person should show off:

My neighbor told me he keeps losing falcons to the widening gyre so I asked how many falcons he has and he said he just goes to the falconry and gets a new falcon afterwards so I said it sounds like he’s just feeding falcons to drown with the ceremony of innocence and then Yeats started crying.

US government rn

I demand justice for Jade #TheTraitors

Built the Lego Mighty Bowser today. Huge and delightful.

Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu will skip the signing of US President Donald Trump’s “Board of Peace” in Davos after Switzerland confirmed it would enforce the ICC arrest warrant over war crimes in Gaza.

I assume Board Of Peace is just a Ministry Of Truth deal and they'll soon be invading countries and dividing up the world between themselves.

"The evidence that's been mounting" what evidence? I hope Jade wins. #TheTraitors

MPs should be paid the median wage of the country because then they'll be helping themselves if they make things better for the majority.

I'm off to see the extended edition of The Fellowship Of The Ring in the cinema. I hope it doesn't happen while I'm in there.

I'm sure everyone who hounded Angela Rayner will be similarly robust with Farage.

EXCITING NEWS: EMD's pricing structure has been announced and while that may SEEM boring it's actually very exciting because it's so reasonably priced. £12 at launch BUT with a 25% discount means it's like £9 and you are getting a LOT of funny game for that. store.steampowered.com/news/app/363...

I judge my dog every time she goes crazy hearing a ring doorbell on the street/on TV, but really it's just the dog equivalent of me excitedly checking my phone when I get a news alert in case It's Happened

It'll somehow project searchlights, like the start of Batman The Animated Series.

“…and so the human race suffered a worldwide economic collapse and then a global conflict that wiped out their species, just because one ruler went to war because they did not win a peace prize” - Cautionary Tales from around the Universe, updated edition.

I hope he sang it like Tina Turner.

Here's an idea: maybe it's because the increased embedding of reasonable adjustments to support pupils with different needs in school & university means that pathway has been opened up to more ADHD students, which should be celebrated. No? We're not going with that one?

Just been for a walk on the pier and they played John Farnham's You're The Voice and now I feel the urge to watch Alpha Papa.

That reminded me of this photo of me and the other Welsh people on our Kilimanjaro trek.

I am once again begging if you insist on having Farage on your show, don't ask him a single thing about Trump/Ukraine/etc. None of his business. Ask him about Tendring Council's revised housing targets or proposed brown-site rezoning in Clacton. Make up an area of Clacton & see if he even notices.

How it started/how it's going

As Pratchett said:

I'd like new phones to feature technology that disables video calls on public transportation.

This photo was taken in 1911 using glass plate technology by Herbert Ponting who was part of Scott's Antarctic expedition, The composition and detail are exquisite with the band of white snow/ice creating a perfect frame around the two people and the ship in the distance Iconic imo

"You are a bit defensive around the table" yeah because you keep naming me for absolutely no reason #TheTraitors