I got some hot honey cashews and I am loving life #cashews #life

Time for soda, #sodafriends

The best thing to get a micro SD card out of a device is *another micro SD card* They are scamming us

I was completely obsessed with this book as a child and now I own it again. This is tremendous.

I’ve learned that some people believe that eggs are dairy. Every type of person you can imagine exists.

The cola is very, very good today :)

I bought some RC Cola after not having it for over 20 years. I have determined that I have not been missing anything.

my most radical take is that i think machines and computers got no soul so it’s ok to beat them into pieces with a hammer

Famitsu gave me a 12 out of 40 😞

Another night, another opportunity to have a soda. Cheers to my "fellow soda lovers" :)

Here's the free trial of my Top 700 Songs of All Time. The rest is paid DLC. This is NOT THE TOP 20, just 20 from the list. Stop screaming at my house about it.

Megabonk is a good-ass video game

After a thorough analysis, I have determined I am bad at posting. Please write to your lawmakers about resolving this.

your core users are people who have already demonstrated a willingness to abandon a more popular social media site for another, in the most part for disliking the politics of the people who run it. write this on a big whiteboard somewhere in the office

KOKO THE GORILLA: Koko birkin bag. Practical Koko possession bag RESEARCHER: No, Koko. You can’t have a Birkin bag. KOKO: Good Birkin good Koko give beautiful Koko deserve gorilla RESEARCHER: Koko, we simply can’t afford a Birkin bag. It is an unjustifiable expense. KOKO: jealousy professor

who else up supping on naught but broth of bean

Types Of Souls Bosses: - guy in a room totally freakin out - Stomp Jomperson - the gang is back together and they hate you - Bumpos Palace of Tricks - you interrupted my dinner/mourning and now you gotta die

You can't get a hot crab stick sandwich anywhere anymore. Pisses me off.

With Eric Adams dropping out of the mayoral race, let’s take a moment to remember one of his most unintentionally funny videos

Eating candy corn and thinking about Lewis Black’s bit about candy corn youtu.be/o4vVGG_FcvY?...

Time for the night soda

Growing up is having a preferred brand of paper towel

I can’t go single week without thinking about the Chip Tha Ripper “Interior Crocodile Alligator” freestyle. Truly an all timer.

We love to press space, backspace, and escape. Shift is OK to press. Control is not good to press. Forward slash is good. Backslash is bad. Thank you.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who has thought about this

I had to explain the Insane Clown Posse to my aging relatives 😔

Placing my hand on a running dishwasher like it’s a pregnant animal

It took going to a single day of a music festival to totally turn me on crowd surfing. I used to feel nothing. Now it is selfish and I feel like I am being involved in someone’s kink.

In Metal Gear Solid (1998), when fighting the Hind D helicopter, you're advised to keep track of its location by listening to the stereo panning. But if you've set "Sound" to "Monaural" in the Options menu, you get this exclusive addition. . .

i go absolutely crazy for this art bc its just two people showing off their critters and the dude on the left is just so pumped about how fucking cool they are

the right wing: you should be willing to put your issues aside and reach across the aisle to work with us also the right wing:

Well, it’s official. I’m in my “my role was impacted by the company’s restructuring” era.

Whenever I use my ice cream scoop, I think about the Yeah Yeah Yeahs

there has been an abnormal number of newsworthy coldplay shows this year, compared to the 25 year average of 0

And when the GI Joe man said “help computer”, I felt that

My list of the best Magic: The Gathering cards. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

This is a joke so funny I'm mad I didn't think of it

Finally

Thinking about Muxtape dot com. I used to find a lot of good music there. Now it's just gone.

I like having a cup of coffee because then I get to have a cup of coffee

My mom started hanging old CDs in the garden so that if a bird comes over to peck at a tomato it will quickly become distracted by its desire to learn QuickBooks

Am I feeling sad because of my life or is it just a buildup of black bile? Even the experts can't agree

r/AITAH Veiled bully knocking over my cairns with powerful strikes and punches — ancestral spirits now rebuking ME??

Husband, mother, Christian, private investigator, beguiling presence, anointed, dumbfounded, eager to please, happy to be here, your friend and confidant

Today's sketch, now available to own on Home Video. I mean you can watch it on YouTube, and you should because then I get money. It's the 80s, baby. youtu.be/23SKNZEUQuk

i am proud to announce that i died, i dead

They need to make a stinky soda. A soda that smells. NOTE: I mean a real soda company, not that Uncle Fucknut's Ranch Dressing Fizzing Soda Drink