good morning to all those who celebrate

this comports with my high opinion of country fandom

This Paramount merger feels like it's going to threaten the entire film industry with ai sloppification. First music now this. Anything I find aspirational is getting murdered slowly by people who look like fucking boiled eggs.

there was that one article about a cybertruck driver who was all "kids love it! I pass out toys when we go camping", but parking your car and leaving it recording video in areas where children play is also some pedo-adjacent behavior. So IDK do not trust these people.

Not mine, but my ex's favorite superhero:

really fun night out drinking into a blackout. I told a bunch of nurses that they were the realest. I pledged to start a band with I think at least three people. I smoked my first cigarette in what must have been years. OH FUCK THIS ISNA MIDL"IFEMCRISEIS

EMINEM: have you ever freaked the joker out with one magic trick well i have i shoved a pencil down the hole of my dick

Please do quote me out of context this one

They prefer shar yeehaw law

honestly it's a good policy and i support it despite not knowing what the fuck this is about. it's lowest common denominator "biological imperative" bullshit

Got the hiccups, and I'm retasting every drop of capcaicin I've ingested over the last 24 hrs. Don't worry, I'm strong 💪I'll get through this

The Sloth slowly coming down from our tree green but not with envy just moss and bits of leaves adorn my skin is this all that there is?

if I got owned in public by Joe Rogan I would throw myself under a cybertruck

Been spending a lot of time lately thinking about Julius Belmont and the army of mankind

WHAT? the brooms were rad!

xfiles I want to believe poster about civics

With the best accounts, every post is a cry for help

when i say I'm fragile it means I'm drunk AND on the verge of tears. normally I'm just one or the other

seeing all these FanDuel sponsored "analysts" talk about sports on tv really makes me long for the days when nerds weren't allowed to talk about sports on tv. or at least, when they did, they were nerds like Bob Costas, who is cool afaik. don't crush my illusion I'm fragile right now

Please help my friend,Marla, out. Share and/or donate if y'all can.

Fairies can be metal as fuck

I once dreamt up a brand of whisky called Dullahan's, named after an Irish fairy that shows up at your house carrying its own head, vomits blood all over you, and then after it leaves a relative dies. Don't at me if someone else also thought of this.

Gen Z has officially turned the tables and now the bartender is over-sharing with me

EMINEM: have you ever tried real hard at understanding the arts well not me i get confused watching ghostbusters at parts

Sure i can get you an "expresso" martini but the rottie we got tied up in the back has already had her glands expressed twice today so is it ok if the musk isn't fresh?

If you could interview any celebrity, living or dead? Werner Herzog, either state a fantastic interview subject.

I can't believe I waited this long to watch Bad Lieutenant. What a good movie. "Shoot him again. His soul is still dancing."

Don't quote me out of context

we know it’s bursting because OpenAI just asked for a preemptive bailout

when you say you're "peachy keen, jelly bean" but you are in fact "fucking shit, sour patch kid"

Unitarian Juggalos believe that non-Juggalos can also be part of the Dark Carnival, as long as they adhere to some of the tenets. e.g. Tom Waits being well-versed in the use of the 1929 pneumatic calliope.

"If I see that piece of shit Bluto walking around my part of town it's on sight, motherfucker ayuk-uk-uk-uk-uk" *TOOT TOOT*

ngl it's been pretty funny watching a non-insignificant portion of radlibs post like barracks communists lately, but please remember that luxuries and vices are fun and good in moderation

luxuries and vices are good things as long as you don't do whatever the fuck our current economy is doing right now

I really hate melatonin. The brain fog I wake up with takes hours to clear

sharing corner: It's been pretty cool reconnecting with the local music scene in my little slice of the urban sprawl. I'm hoping to have some finished songs soon.

I'll never be a big shitposter bc while i think it's fun and all, i just don't have the stamina to pump out that many per day anymore. posting's a young person's game

Friends I am here to uplift

I wanna see Trump in a gator neck bc i bet it'd give him a camel toe

change one letter, ruin a candy Gobslopper

Some of you never listened to What's He Building In There and internalised it's message and it fucken shows

🎶when you're weary feeling small AND PENIS ALL AROUND...🎶

If you see this, quote with a robot that isn't from "Star Wars", "Star Trek", "Doctor Who", or "Transformers".

Quote post with your favorite reaction gif of all time. (this better animate when i post it bc it's not from tenor)

listening to white house press is always some shit like REPORTER: president trump have you thought about using the dark crystals to negate all existence TRUMP: thats a very interesting idea thank you for bringing it up

The only time immigration has ever negatively affected me was when, in the 1920s, our family came to the USA instead of going to Australia like a few distant cousins apparently did. What you mean I could have been Italian AND Australian? Fuck me, that would have been an unbeatable combo.

Yeah, we'd love to but some cunt turned it into an air b&b

Bring back calling people the "top banana"

I have invented a new form of high explosive using only sparkling water and Peri Peri chicken