Every day is a fuckass miracle

Geese in top artists last 30 days lineup on lastfm. Going ✈️ boymode

Jacob elordi looks like an Italian guy that was designed by someone that isn’t sure what an Italian guy looks like

a lil comic about making comics

Sometimes I’m like ugh millennials are so cringe and then I find an account that’s just videos of a squirrel puppet twerking

Guy that peed in my mouth last weekend told me that my best albums of the year list is missing Lily Allen. Being gay is so fucking stupid

Reading a “leaving new york” instagram carousel essay and taking -10 poison damage with a 2d6 hour nauseous debuff

Nice gyre. Widening?

Uniquely humiliating experience of furniture shopping online

She hates it. Bummer bitch we’re taking pictures

they feed us poison so we buy they cure luckily i love poison it taste good to me

Operation Mincemeat getting extension after extension on Broadway meanwhile have never heard a single gay person say its name. Something does NOT ADD UP here

Letterboxd pushing their new Video Store rental service because everything has to have exponential profit growth. Yuck on a duck

Oh very funny. For your information that’s actually not the hardest part about it. The hardest part is going into the pawn shop over and over and over again to get your rollerblades out of hock when the conversion therapy doesn’t take

I saw a lot of people posting their favorite cover songs and thought I’d add mine to the mix

Plural of giraffe is giravves. Thanks for coming to my ted talk

Very hot guy from the sex party and I connected on Instagram but I recently turned my account into a DJ promo thing. Deeply humiliating

Call me sleepyhead the way I’m passionate about these pits

Omg you’re like my yo-yo… that glowed in the dark…

You can leave an even number of dogs in a hot car. They cancel out

I’m a performative male but the performance is butoh

I don’t think so honey: spoon rests

I luv 2 have fun w my friends :^)

Everyone In Dream Smells Smoke https://theonion.com/everyone-in-dream-smells-smoke-1819571202/

Selfie

Winter follow up: Barb and Star Climb Mt. Fjellendär. Skiing hijinks, lodge romance, matching sweaters montage

I’ve sometimes fallen into the trap of thinking that complementing a creative person for their work is less sophisticated or desired than discussion or debate about it but very often the best thing you can say to them is hell yeah and that doesn’t make you dumb it just makes you nice

If Starfleet enforces a strict shaved-pits dress code with those cunty little tops then baby I’m joining the Borg or w/e

When a guy asks if I’m into car play

People posting all pop diva wrappeds and being like “haha Spotify called me a gay guy 🤪” and uhhhh no you listening to that much Selena Gomez and means all of us get to call you something much meaner

Husband when he makes us watch Legally Blonde for the 4325th time:

Perfect bday lunch served by a cute he/they. Baby we’re cookin with gas

Men only want one thing and it’s disgusting

Sexy short king that works on my floor has a fucking ACCENT I’m gonna lose my mind

the goat. gouache painting on paper, 2018

I’ve literally never had imposter syndrome and now I’m being asked to do some really exciting things and I’m just like. But I’m ??? Normal ?

So true!

Mouse in a Santa hat saying “cheese-ons greetings” send tweet

Sexy vers daddy couple hit me up on sniffies on day 6 in Oregon as I was on my way to the airport

I know I’m Coheedpilled but the first three records are all no-skips for me. Perfect prog rock post-hardcore fantasy nonsense.

Have to unfollow one of the most attractive men on earth because he won’t stop posting furry transformation art

Nessarose actress gulag immediately

Almost every time when tanner’s like “omg I actually haven’t seen [famous movie]” I am so excited to go down that path with him but today Moulin Rouge came up and I just don’t know that I’m strong enough