Solo Jazz lookin ass chart

Happy Partially Muscled Skeleton Standing By The Perimeter Fence And Screaming For Thirty Seconds Before Vanishing Day today all who celebrate

we have a president who only does good things when everyone calls him a pedophile. our mission for the next 3 years is clear.

My dude's like 5 minutes away from ripping up the floorboards and asking everyone why they can't hear it.

Jesus having the term “in-app purchases” explained to him and just wordlessly filling a sock with nickels

Sometimes I think about Jimmy Carter having to sell his peanut farm.

Super underrated

I like how full text search of every book and human thought ever was a SOLVED PROBLEM in 2001, and now dicks at search engines and my own phone – a piece of silicon faster to respond than God was ever imagined in scripture – prevent it from working, _as a retroactive infantilizing design choice_.

I know we are numb but this story would be daily front page news until forced resignation for every other President in history

I think it's the "saving up for braces" part of this story that adds a whole new level of ick. Like... that's a kid, man

Realizing we didn't need all this fucking red string at all

Pizzagate: If you replace the word “hot dog” with “little boy” and “pizza party” with “child sex orgy,” you will see the lengths these elites go to cover up their crimes. Real elite emails: Send me nude pictures of those 8th graders we abused last weekend post-haste! I am the Ambassador to Turkey.

Wow, so I don't want to use bluesky search to find the "____ a movie" meme - at least not in public.

Goon a movie: Princess Goononoke

Goon a movie: The Twilight Saga: New Goon

Ohmygod

Happy Exploding Whale Day for those who celebrate :)

If you live anywhere in the North half of the US I don't think you'll even need to go outside smaller cities to see them. My partner can set them from inside Cedar Rapids! #aurora #northernlights

"some people spread happiness wherever they go, others whenever they go" -Oscar Wilde

the lady that filled the bird feeder was two hours late and chester was starting to get pissed

Ugh, teenagers. When I don't want them to sleep in endlessly they do, when I do, they don't.

Godzilla,Sir Francis Drake, James Bond, things of that nature.

My paternal grandfather's people immigrated from Sweden, and I think worked in fishing industry. They lived a while in Marquette, MI. I never really spent much time poking around the maps and photos of the area until just recently, but wow: it's really pretty.

“I’m so relieved that the only problem I cared about - me experiencing mild social discomfort - is now over” my brother in Christ, do you want to bet

just saying if one of the 8 folding Dems wants they can use this as an excuse to change their mind and not give Trump exactly what he wants

THEY PEPPER SPRAYED A BABY THEY PEPPER SPRAYED A BABY Please read this entire excellent piece by Caroline, which points out that a judge ordered the Feds (again) to stop doing **this exact kind of thing** and they are still continuing to do it all over Chicago

Happy There Is A Circulatory System Walking Through The Kitchen Day to all who celebrate.

Not remotely good enough @markwarner.bsky.social , your failure to persuade @kaine.senate.gov means I'll support primary challenge against you, since there are plenty of Democrats who seem to understand how important it is to organize real opposition to the gangster president and not quit so easy.

How about we shut down the government for this very popular and specific goal and then, hear me out, we hold out for like a month and a half and then, ok this part is important, after a watershed election where we ran the table, ONLY THEN, fold and don't get the one thing we said we wanted.

So, we're 20% of the way through this shitshow. Carry on.

Cowards die many times before their deaths, The valiant never taste of death but once.

My phone or my earbuds did not like running in the rain just now. Just kind of randomly started turning the volume off or skipping forward whatever track was playing (chapter(s) of "The Perpetual Astonishment of Jonathon Fairfax").

Idea for feds getting back pay "thanks to" @kaine.senate.gov and @markwarner.bsky.social: buy a series of ever smaller envelopes to send them, empty, representing the number of GOP votes their idiotic deal is going to net. Or to contain their rapidly shrinking legacies and/or backbones.

Russ Vought will take this as a green light to keep ignoring Congress

The man who called out war dead "suckers and losers" is indeed pure trash, and the fact that pretends to support the military is the most disgraceful thing ever.

I’m missing three paychecks, I want this to have meant something. I’m tired of getting sold down the river by D’s and abused by R’s. I want the D’s to hold the line, especially now when the R’s are finally freaking out.

still wild how many companies/media organizations/thought leaders etc. seem to be operating under the assumption this guy and his movement have the mandate of the American people when it's clear that most of us hate him

Americans can’t afford this deal. Democrats can fight AND win — just like we did in our budget battle in Michigan. A promise isn’t a deal. Don’t settle.

Trump has staffed his government with straight up segregationists who are almost literally spitting on the graves of people who gave their lives for this country.

Fucking hardcore pentathlon.

@jaketapper.bsky.social come back here you raggedy bitch and report on this

So the oldest person ever to become president keeps falling asleep in his office during public events and there’s no big public discussion on how this is a coverup or how republicans are lying to us about how this government is running?

Man I'm in a shit mood.

I can’t believe Zohran is transing the trains already www.mta.info/article/f-m-...

Nice, there's a propublica ad on my metro train. Lol.

Daughter got a school award last night, and after we went out for ice cream. I got what turned out to be the saltiest possible salted caramel. It was so salty I almost couldn't finish my second scoop.

Perfectly captures Trump’s empathy for his fellow man.

A 34-year-old as a politician: My god he's like a baby. It's like they just elected an infant to be their mayor. A 34-year-old as an athlete: You have to admire the bravery of him attempting that dunk, knowing full well the grim reaper is right behind him.