Goodnight kings

I don't want kids but this man could absolutely turn me into that Duggar lady

It's gonna be Sinners/PTA/Buckley/Jordan/Madigan/Skarsgard I just know it

Jo Dee Messina and porn playing at the gay bar, I know that's right

A dog at the park came right up to me and wanted pets and the owner was like "that's weird, he usually doesn't like men" and I was like well sir guess what

Exhausted, but managed an ok shoulder day with the Girls

Why does overwhelming urge to nap always hit five minutes after I get to the gym

Post your favorite Kristi Noem pics, I'll go first

Obligatory post-leg day butt pic

The Shirley Temple 7Up

Marked Dead From Leg Day 🚩

Who else feels absolutely obliterated after doing 4 sets of medium-heavy squats? Like I still have an entire workout to go and I want lay on the floor and die. And I didn't even go that hard!!

Finally watched the Industry finale. Not Yasmlaine Hanani-Maxwell! I fear there is no coming back for you, my deeply incompetent trauma sponge

Not me at a pool league game knocking the entire pool table out of alignment with my big largeness. Never beating the bull in a china shop allegations I fear

WeHo tonight

I've seen enough. Rachel Weisz wins Best Supporting Actress at the 2005 Oscars for The Constant Gardener

Flight landed and surprise surprise the pilot was a super hot daddy, like thank you sir for that smooth ride

Halfway to my daily step goal and all I did was just navigate the Dallas airport as normal

Don't think of it as Armageddon think of it as liberating the world from Not Armageddon

I regret to inform my fellow Oscar gays that Shohreh Aghsdashloo has gone full Debra Messing

Just got blocked by a rageful Vancouver gay I've never interacted with, finally understanding why they call Vancouver the skin tag of British Columbia

Arm day

I had a dream that I invented mid-shin length skirts but athleisure style and totally upended the dog show industry

My brain is irrevocably broken because why did I just see the acronym BFAM and immediately translate it to Brassigned Female At Mirth

I just think she's neat

If I die in a nuclear war please tell the next generation of mutant gays that I had a giant fat ass and a preternatural ability to connect any conversation topic to Dianne Wiest

Scary adorable!!!

Anyone need a $9 bottle of water from the airport while I'm here

Everyone booing me for doing the height/weight thing, jokes on you your disdain only makes me taller

I feel fairly certain this is no one's dream

Goodnight

How big are you? 6'4"/193 cm 260 lbs/122 kg

Very important archival pic of my older brother's 12th birthday party with all his super cool friends and me, his annoying gay diva of a little brother

Going out to the gay bar tonight to drown out all the evil in the world

Playing as Veronica Cartwright in the Alien board game because I'm a girl's girl

Very important: my husband put Barb in a jockstrap

Trying to get a tit shot but failing

The lines Ryan Murphy makes Isabella Rossellini say in The Beauty are so bad and embarrassing he should be sent to the Hague, for icon abuse

Friday Friday Gotta Do Chest On Friday

Rich gays near you looking for SAKS

Me joining the fun reparte between Gen Z gays, uninvited

Both sides now

Update: just flew home and did this about 3 more times! Sometimes your body just wants to DAAANCE

Apropos to absolutely nothing in the news, my hubby once did an improv workshop for a pro hockey team and their boobalicious wives/gfs and the women left immediately and the dudes basically spent 2 hours ruining exercises by taking every opportunity to fake-hump each other (bc gay = hilarious bro!!)

One thing about me is if I have more than half an hour to kill before my flight I WILL be seated in that shitty airport massage chair

Busy businesswomaning this week, you love to see it

Me full body spasming every time I *almost* fell asleep on my flight today. Like what is that weird bolt of energy called

Jeans split open in the gunch at the airport just before boarding my flight, pray for me and my inner thigh

Shoulder moulding

Wild beasts of the brutal LA winter