Stealworkers

This Weeks Onion Magazine:

Via returning contributor A. Frog: I shall never mess up again defector.com/is-this-the-...

We have an incredible opportunity in Miami today to flip the mayoral seat for the first time in nearly 30 years! If you live in Miami, get out and vote for Eileen Higgins before polls close at 7pm. Find your polling place at IWillVote.com.

All I'm saying is that if I had stupid name that is easy to get wrong, I wouldn't correct people all the time. I'd smile graciously and put my parents in the worst nursing home I could find.

I'm bored today so I decided it's time to announce the secret project.

They’re describing it as a “shock and awe” campaign, which is why it’s essential to show them there’s huge opposition NOW. Call / email your reps to let them know you oppose censorship bills like KOSA and the SCREEN. Read up and get involved in the @fightforthefuture.org Week of Action.

Spotify is garbage on every count: Its treatment of artists, its ICE advertising, the CEO's investment in military AI, its leading role in the commodification and AI slopification of music, its terrible audio quality—you name it. So I quit, and put together a complete guide to getting off Spotify:

Polls open NOW till 7PM, find your polling location: iwillvote.com

‼️ Give directly to 437 Rwandan families in poverty, and your donation will be 1.5x matched until midnight ET for #GivingTuesday. This means every $100 will turn into $150 for a family in need: givedirectly.org/GT

My latest is a tribute to the enduring power of friendship:

We lowered the annual subscription price of Nebula (with creator code) to $30. That’s 50% off the regular price. Happy holidays 🎄

I chimed in with haven't you ever heard of closing time, you don't have to go home but you can't stay here.

And we knew this. This wasn't speculation. We studied it, we had the talking points. We trained volunteers to explain this to people. It's not a surprise. Rich people don't flee places with good quality of life when we increase the quality of life. They might try to cheat us, but they don't leave.

It's wild (and very evil) that Megyn Kelly's defense of Donny Demento boils down to "if there's frost on the pumpkin, it's time for dinky dunkin".

If you are the type to tell others how to internet some thoughts: First, last week seems to have broken a lot of "big poster" brains. Second, naw man, paternalistic internet etiquette posts (with replies disabled) are whack. Wiggy whack even.

If Trump is boycotting the G20, does that mean we all have to go?

Every fucking time we give Democrats our support, they let us down. Useless cowards, so desperate for the safety of the old, broken system that feeds them and starves us.

Dick Cheney departs the world he made: defector.com/dick-cheney-...

Well, we all know one nepo baby who is going to be extra insufferable this week.

So everyone is gonna go back to posting about they buttholes in the morning, right?

I've seen a lot of great art on Bluesky. This is phenomenal. Happy Halloween!

There is more than enough funding for SNAP. The Trump administration is using food insecurity as a political weapon.

#SaveSpeech We need folks to hammer paypros, as the holiday season is a prime opportunity to clog up their call centers and have our impact be felt the hardest. Need contacts, talking points, etc? use the site linked! It has a ton of info that is still relevant and useful!

You’ve probably heard but I have been federally indicted by Trump’s DOJ. We now have to cover the costs of a campaign *and* a legal battle to preserve our First Amendment rights. Help us win this fight by chipping in at katforillinois.com/legal

Why do some spiders make web art? defector.com/why-do-some-...

I will repost this forever.

Get this out there.

I'm honored to have the endorsement of President @barackobama.bsky.social. He knows how high the stakes are on November 4th — and he knows that every vote counts.

Did anyone else see this today and wonder wtf happened? Oopsie, Stephen.

A huge win for trans people in California: the state legislature passed five bills protecting our rights! Now it's time to call on Governor Gavin Newsom to sign them. Contact him before October 12th: transfamilysos.org/action-neede... #TransRights #TransYouth #TransCalifornia

More than 1800 detainees are missing after the closure of Alligator Alcatraz. Their families and lawyers can’t find them and they’ve vanished from the ICE database. Feels like this should be a much bigger story www.miamiherald.com/news/local/i...

Happy "It didn't happen again" to all who celebrate.

Do this to voice your outrage at Disney's unjust cancellation of Kimmel and other people's shows for simply practicing their free speech, ASAP.

As you cancel streaming services, here is a casual reminder that only 16% of Americans read for pleasure anymore, and your local library has hundreds or thousands of books you haven't read. They would love to see you stop by and renew your library card.

So, national strike when?

If you see this... You know the rest.

Holy crap! There's an ACTUAL NUMBER for PayPal in this! PayPal is NOTORIOUS for never giving out numbers!!! This is pure gold!

The GOAT

we did a kill the computer episode on how violence in the world is becoming irony poisoned individuals last week, very relevant to recent events still

Here's a good blog post: defector.com/this-is-who-...

ATTN FELLOW CANADIANS: An actual MP has created a petition to stop financial discrimination against adult creators by payment processors. You have to confirm your email but thats because its something that can actually be shown to parliament.

In mourning, I will be lowering my gums down my teeth to half mast.

Five years of Defector: defector.com/five-years-o...

Loopy D is his rap name.

Do it. Search your name. Take their money. It’s yours anyway.

Join us for a virtual Know Your Rights training this Friday, September 5 to get prepared and learn how to keep yourself and your community safe.

Ruin a movie by making it about Gary There's something about Gary