There was a Xmas mixtape my family had (marked XMAS in red felt tip), which I adopted as my official Xmas album. Every year, it's not officially Christmas til it plays. I haven't managed yet this year, but the King's College carol service has so far had three tracks from it, like they KNOW.

The thing about structure is that it’s not a straitjacket, it’s a service. If you’re going to ignore it in your story, you’d better replace the expected beats with better, more engaging ones, or people will just wait for the expected beats and be annoyed you’re taking too long to deliver them.

It's Christmas Eve, I'm a grown-up, and I can have year-old Aldi florentines for breakfast if I want to.

I don't know what news everyone else is listening to, but I can practically hear the raised eyebrow in every "does not indicate any wrongdoing" – I expect those who think the Beeb is excessively liberal are penning their op-eds around the line "Auntie doth protest too much".

On PM: "... but they're not the sort of shoes you'd find in the shop!" Yes, that is exactly my problem with shoe shopping.

Why do businesses think we're a bottomless pit to extract money from through trickery? When did they stop seeing themselves as a source of usefulness or entertainment, who are required provide us with a service worth paying for?

He's making a list, He's nailing it high, Indulgences, No longer apply, Martin Luther's coming to town

this actually makes me feel a lot less weird about feeling much more comfortable in places that are racially diverse. I like that it goes both ways

This is an angle that I don't feel is pushed enough.

He sees you when you're sleeping He knows when you're awake He knows you would taste really good So be ready with your stake Oh You'd better not shout You'd better not cry He's moving to London, he's sexy and bi Dracula is coming to town

Hey, fellow US citizens. The Federal government is proposing to gut the Endangered Species Act, specifically removing regulatory amendments to the bill made since 2019. Here is a post explaining why you, a regular joe, can and should leave a personal public comment. www.tumblr.com/why-animals-...

The sooner we do this and embrace Unknowns, the sooner I can make that 17-series podcast about history, folklore, faith, being an immigrant, cool people I've met, mental health, and whether or not I *did* meet God that one time but told Him to fuck off

This is my favourite of all putdowns ever.

Just putting it out there that Jonathan Stroud (Lockwood, Bartimaeus, Scarlett & Browne) is a really lovely fellow who writes really entertaining books for young people that also have a clearer view of how the world works than some fantasy authors I could name.

WHAT’s up guys its Plato welcome back to the cave. Guys we’ve got some CRAZY shadows for you today you are not gonna want to miss this! But first I have to thank our sponsor OnX Backcountry

We all love a narcissistic elderly leader with a ridiculous amount of wives, who lies about his achievements and vitality, right? Coz episode 5 is about RAMESSES II! Queen shins! The prettiest cow in Memphis! A goat! Listen here or on R4 at 2.45! www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/...

It’s not the Industrial Revolution. It’s colonialism, resource plunder from the vulnerable, and enforced free labour (whatever you want to call that) for the benefit of a declared overclass. Empire by another name, not charming top hats and poop-poop steam engines.

A gentle reminder if you've received an invoice from a Freelancer/Self employed person which is due before Christmas. Be a love, and pay it today.

Do you work in Affinity Publisher? Would you like some freelance work, or to screen share with me and show me how to fix things? I've got a bunch of notes from the printer that are above my pay grade (£0) and am open to throwing a little money at the problem to make it go away.

Just FYI, our new funny children’s podcast is available worldwide on all podcast apps, so it’s not subject to the BBC’s usual 28 day delay

“the only way to get to the truth is by speaking to one another” no it’s research, you’re thinking of research, that’s why you don’t get given a medical degree for debating whether bones exist

What do you get if you cross Beyonce with James Bond? The answer is less a punchline and more this 15 minute comedy podcast. Surprise Luggage! Jazz Age Paris! WW2 Superspies! A perfumed pig! MLK! A Cheetah at the cinema! A beautiful Princess riding to the rescue! AND MORE!

EPISODE 4 and it's about pioneers of the Jazz Age! But also about WW2, espionage & heroism! But also about the US Civil Rights Movement & fighting racism internationally! But also about princesses, pigs & the power of silliness! Because it's about Josephine Baker! www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/...

The fact that it at least anecdotally seems to be a semi-regular practice to tell white people a minority got the job in order to soften the blow of rejection really should put the elite woke panic into perspective.

#PavaneWatch Fauré – if my theory is correct, perhaps this one is for Robin Ince.

Birds. I really loved birds. I wanted to be a bird. The closest I could get was drawing them. (And running around the playground flapping my arms, but that didn't last.)

A very blokey youth in a Santa hat has just attested, in the midst of his friends' casual chat about movies, that Dr Zhivago is one of his favourite films of all time, in case you were wondering whether this was the Cambridge train.

Do you have a tricky conservative on your Xmas list? Why not get them a nice safe book about dead white men being brave, which underlines the value of cooperation and science (and fact checking), while supporting a genuinely progressive small independent press? store.ironcircus.com/products/the...

LUNCH. IS. SORTED!!!

America, you do not like home break-ins. But what if selling stolen goods is the way to restart the retail industry?

The key thing to understand I think, is that Silicon Valley tech came out of military and academic spaces, where libraries of data were available free thanks to tax dollars. But out here in Real Land, I can’t go to the library and sell the books off a cart. I’d be arrested.

EPISODE 2, and it's about Hadrian & his wall! HADIE LIKEY! Any teachers doing Roman Britain this year - you're welcome. Find out all about the bearded nepo, how building stuff was his love language, & how his border wall on a chilly island didn't QUITE go to plan. www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/...

I wish the whole world would stop being spineless and tell him he's a wanker. This could unite the planet www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

In my opinion this would vastly improve it. Especially if the Minotaur ate whichever panellist interrupted the most.

Yesterday my Patreon supporters got 38 PAGES of people sketches from the summer. You can join them! 50% off your first month with code 2025-12 or 10% off the already discounted annual membership with HAPPY2026. Gift memberships also possible. Good till the 31st! www.patreon.com/posts/135572...

A few nights ago I dreamt that a flight attendant got on the PA mid-flight to tell us that Trump had stepped down, and everyone forgot for a moment how much worse Vance would be and cheered. There was such a sense of relief. Then I woke up and remembered he would never ever do that.

Sounds about right.

This entire weekend

Hello!! You can now listen to ep1 of our new family-friendly BBC history show, Dead Funny History. It’s fun, factual, silly, and based on academic research used for You’re Dead To Me episodes This episode is about the history of football ⚽️ listen now on BBC SOUNDS www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/...

Just been to the post office and seen that last UK 2nd class post is Wednesday and 1st class is Saturday, so lets do a flash sale. All Happytoast.co.uk prints from now until Friday night are buy one get one free. If I've got it in stock it should be with you for Christmas.

Ring all the bells! My agent pal @ladygoofus.bsky.social is open for Middle Grade AND YA graphic novels!

Penguin Doodles from this past week…@mariswicks and I are doing a penguin-a-day for the month of December.

For once I am ahead of the curve ...

I am not above saying that today is my birthday, if that sweetens the pot 🎉🥳

For the record, Robin Ince is a superb comedian, an absolute mensch, a remarkable thinker and the kindest human you’ll ever meet. And the BBC is a genuinely great and globally unique institution that needs to stop being afraid. I think that’s where most of its faults and issues stem from.

Can't wait for Robin Ince to get as many column inches in the national press over his actual establishment silencing due to his stance on lgbt+ rights as phobes get over their former friends not wanting to hang out so much any more

“He’s the thing!” “There you go again with the polarizing divisive language.” “He ate a dog! Right on TV! With his chest! And now he has a second head! It’s a dog head! He’s the thing!” “Well millions of people think he isn’t the thing. You need to have the debate.”

Very sad that I felt I had no choice but to resign from The Infinite Monkey Cage - a victory for the transphobes and other bigots - I did it because so much of the media has chosen to believe the kind and empathetic people are a fiction - they are real and so often unrepresented.

Looking for an *L.A. based* artist who (against all odds) has time for a poster gig before the end of the year. It's for a science + art event. We can offer $500 for the gig. Dreadfully sorry about the timeline. Link a portfolio if you're interested, I'll delete this post when we found someone.

Indianapolis Star, November 22, 1918