SPROTTTT

I know this isn't the most important thing but I just want to highlight that the standfirst swaps clarity for poetry by choosing 'scrotum ' over 'testicles' and so we must salute it.

Very pleased to confirm that @eddierobson.bsky.social is an actual real person in real life and has excellent taste in mexican psych-shoegaze.

For the record, it was gnocchi in the air-fryer that radicalised me

I used to show new employees this in my "Welcome to product management at the BBC" presentation.

Fascinating that British political discourse is still haunted by the ghost of The Dinner Party: an event that's shifting, protean, always happening somewhere, capacious enough to hold all your enemies' decadent iniquities, and never happening either at your house or that of any your friends

Plumbert fucks

GUYS CHECK OUT MY PUDDING

Truly a blaffair to rememblack

Same exact vibe

There's something uniquely exhausting about the little dance you need to do to demonstrate that you understand all the little nuances of this stuff - ESPECIALLY THE BITS WE DON'T TALK ABOUT. So exhausting in fact, that I find myself perilously close to sympathising with Kemi Badenoch.

Happy Performative North East Understanding Day to those who celebrate. Super darts, popping your weasel, canny, Jeff man I cannae see etc etc

Amazing.

Oh was the queem there?

I have to say I'm surprised that the politics of supporters of the bad politics party are turning out to be bad.

Please spare a thought for everyone who somehow has a child that is, for some reason, old enough to be starting their GCSEs today (???)

I'm watching Mad Men for the first time (I know) and QQ: is every episode about suicide?

Google translate has a language learning feature in beta at the moment that's...really good?

found a whole operation of unmanned youtube channels making completely unchecked long form slop videos where the ai voice simulacra regularly trips up & does this for a full ten minutes every time. all the very legit comments are like "NO! THATS NOT TRUE! YOU LIE HE DID NOT" & never acknowledge it.

Straight women scrolling through Instagram to find a decent photo when you ask to see their crush

I recently watched a _very_ long Youtube essay about how this guy does his tricks. He is a weird little guy. (I tell you this not to contribute to The Discourse but for the mental hygeine of confessing to watching a _very_ long Youtube essay about magic.)

Me, an intellectual: It's inherently ridiculous to even attempt to define the terms of what a "best song ever recorded" includes and excludes, therefore the whole endeavour is futile at best. Me after precisely two beers: No song ever recorded will be as good as Be My Baby by The Ronettes

Your semi-regular reminder that "Be My Baby" is the best pop song ever recorded. Rest well, Queen.

I am, Dear sir, Yours truly,

Ok fine I’ll do it myself. I’m fucking wheezing

Contact sheet of Billie Holiday recording the album Music for Touching Phil Stern, 1955

we all know I have no life, so:

Speed 2? Oh you mean Spood?

This picture of Astronaut Christina Koch after the Artemis landing is frankly incredible and beautiful.

Increasingly furious that you nerds are going to make me find out what FCDO stands for

Things really started picking up for me when I went into business selling blindfolds for all the guys who run the sausage factory.

ME: [wincing, covering up Starmer's ears] sorry, do you mind not talking about politics around Keir? He doesn't know about scary things like nuclear war or poverty or Peter Mandelson and we'd like to maintain his innocence for a bit longer KEIR: my father was a drill bit ME: that's right Keir!

Apropos of nothing, over the last few days, my family has enjoyed the Sam Raimi castaway film and the Uma Thurman thing with the ballet dancers. I would like Hollywood to note that they need to make more silly films. Not less. More. Thank you.

My mum's also reminded me that my grandad's funeral featured a heart attack, a broken leg, an attempted burglary and cousin Liz telling her mum she was pregnant and Liz's mum Auntie Jackie telling Liz she was pregnant too

My mum and dad went on holiday in France in the run up to the Queen's funeral - specifically trying to hide from that specific, mannered grief at a national scale that affects members of their generation so badly. They spent two weeks in 'La France profonde' with no telly or radio. (1/?)

you shouldn’t learn about bands from shady TikTok manipulation, you should learn about bands by hanging out with a girl you like but are also extremely afraid of

oh PLEASE my entire social media philosophy since day one has been blocking straights

How old am I? I'm 'takes photos of chutneys he wants to buy' years old

“Just read another story about me being locked in attick, completely false.”

*dogtanian theme tune* Just to say, I ate your plums Your plums are not breakfast-ready Just to say, I ate your plums They are in my tummy Such a shame when morning comes They were very yummy Please forgive me my good chum Next plums are on me

I just found out that McKay in The Pitt is Brad Dourif's daughter and I'm like OF COURSE!

🚨 In Light Of Global Events, The Official Correct Amount Of Pints Has Been Revised To Five (5) Pints

A thread on comms-failure contingency plans. (Hopefully not necessary but good to know!)

Easter tip: one medium sized boinger

You can really tell America is winning this war when the president panic posts “open the fuckin’ strait, you crazy bastards” at 5 am on Easter Sunday along with an extension on their deadline