out here moonlighting as a freelance volunteer full-time Scam Reporter for StreetEasy😒

Happy Father’s Day to the king of Father’s Day posts

ppl on the socials just now learning Lawrence Fucking Kansas easily one of the chillest, most liberal spots in this godforsaken land

no one warns you now much of being a """""musician""""" is troubleshooting electronics using the world's cattiest and most condescending YouTube videos

due to circumstances I'll elaborate on in the future, I am BEREFT to let go of Kit Fisto, the most dependable & adorable Honda Fit & no member of the Fit Tribe will be surprised to learn that within 15 minutes of me showing interest in selling online, three dealers have called me to fight for him

Happy 72nd birthday to Kathleen Turner, who has always, *always* understood the assignment.

Can’t stop thinking about this.

til about "medieval lo fi" and just... one of those moments when I really love The Internet

The Knicks are the Oilers of Uzbekistan.

Mamdani giving a speech at the Knicks victory parade and Obama giving a speech at the opening of his Presidential Library on the same day is the BARBENHEIMER of oratory, it's MAMBAMA

It's fine to wish these people ill.

Man, I'm watching the DC weather like it's the president's name being removed from a building

ppl who shit on sports to prove socialism credentials are extremely funny, like genuinely

“Scots discovering tailgating” could be a real Prometheus stealing fire moment

Trump's UFC birthday party begins at 8pm tonight. Beneath this metal structure. In this weather.

The gods of metaphor have been putting in OT lately.

yessssss

“The most historic sporting event of all time”? The NBA Finals, the Stanley Cup and the World Cup are all going on right now. This is maybe the fourth biggest sporting event of the weekend.

we’re so desperate for good news we've accepted the scaffolding as our wire mother

Nighttime scenes in movies and TV shows should still be bright and crisp enough to be easily visible. It’s dark for the characters, not the viewer.

humans have known how to construct a shoulder seam for thousands of years, but with AI, we are unlocking untold new ways to fuck it up

Shout out to whoever filmed this I was feeling too lazy to go lift over lunch until I saw it

ooohhhhh

Brooke Rollins says DHS wants to put "AI on drones" to detect screwworm

And here we go. Already Ive been tricked into sending my penis to three of these so called "Group chats". I now have no choice but to shut down my alt where I pretend to be a 36 yr old Sex Worker from Brooklyn, offering my calloused, world weary perspective interspersed with moments of gentle warmth

One of my very dearest friends and her husband got caught as pedestrians in a dust-up between two cars (the footage is on the SF Reddit it's horrifying) and while BFF is okay (thank god) her beau is gonna be laid up for a while and they could use our help www.gofundme.com/f/mark-blevi...

Go to a meeting? The thing that killed Caesar?

I wish all news outlets wrote headlines as well as the Guardian.

I've been trying to explain "negging" and am doing a terrible job. Squad post explainers/video examples that you think do a good job of explaining this war crime youtu.be/5LuEHERsr8E?...

obsessed with thomas. happy pride 🪿🌈✨

this is the ideal newspaper columnist. you may not like it but this is what peak performance looks like

Signs of these Times

Hilariously unlucky idk I've ever had one like this Wordle 1,817 4/6* ⬛⬛🟨⬛⬛ ⬛🟨🟨⬛⬛ ⬛🟨🟨🟨🟨 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

we gotta go harder over here

yeah I feel like you don't pass up the opportunity to include the Olive Garden in the headline here

me & Mo we're doing Sick Day Cinema with The Front Room (Kathryn Hunter in the credits *always* a good sign imo)

new [in]Transition just dropped!! Reframing the Argument: Videographic Criticism as Graduate Research Practice get it while it's hot! intransition.openlibhums.org/issue/1730/i...

wow, just look at his dedication to being anti-woke

tell them there’s a sex criminal in the building

Without downloading new pics what is it like to date (and/or be married to you?

I have a sore throat and used some benzocaine spray but I aimed too far back and like deactivated my pharynx or something and couldn't swallow and nearly called 911 until I realized I could probably wait that one out (reader, I can now swallow again, feel free to proceed with the relevant jokes)

I'd actually pay money for this one

lol this was all over my feed and got my hopes up again www.youtube.com/watch?v=UM1R...

kev: Good morning! How you feeling? me: Weirdly hungover even though I only had 3 drinks over the course of the entire day. kev: Well, you are 50 now. me: .....Sooo did you just call me this morning to remind me that I'm old now? kev: To be fair, you've been old for a while.

Number of times I've replied "you too!" when someone has wished me a happy birthday = 3

lol shout out to the pharmacist who handed me the increased dose HRT patches with a really earnest HAPPY BIRTHDAY and eye contact

hi so I'm 50 now okay www.instagram.com/p/DZFK1BVkS8...

Trump posted his Iran "Documents of Surrender" fantasy on May 18. Then again May 26. Then again just now. Verbatim. Three times. Surely the third time's a charm.