[writing in my journal] April 2nd, 2026. It looks like Jerry still has his verification. April Fools is a cruel jester. We are fools indeed. But we must carry on as if the dagger of hope never kissed our tender hearts, unburdened b--

Oh, dammit, he’s still verified. I had hope BlueSky would do the right thing.

congratulations to @ryangodfrey.com on being the 400th Jerrified user!

Jerrification becomes the gold standard on Bluesky, the social media site

Well now I don’t want to be verified

Good morning. "Jerry Chen Seeking Verification" was a 32-month sociological experiment studying the effects of excessive nagging on social media and its effects on users, conducted by Quinnipiac University. We are now complete with our study; thank you for your time.

oh no... don't verify me tomorrow, even as a joke...

You can cosplay as Jerry so you can attend ATmosphere Conf, @jcsalterego.bsky.social . Attendee: Hi, are you Jerry? Oh-em-gee, you're real! Can we take a twofie? Jerry: Okay, say Jerrified! By the way, I'm a cosplayer cosplaying Jerry.

keep jerry out of atmosphere conf at all costs. they are literally just handing these out.

sheesh

we 100% support jerrification, in fact @blueat.net is Jerrified

everyone on bluesky please thank @joshuajfriedman.com

if jerry becomes jerrified, bluesky will disappear into its own belly button

confirmed: my verification on bluesky is on the roadmap!!

thank you mr cryer

I enjoy seeing who on here has taken the time to get Jerrified.

the elite 350

honestly surprised you haven't applied to be @jerrified.bsky.social

the people know 😌

gee thanks Bluesky community

This is what happens when you’re not jerrified

😐

yea that tracks

BLUESKY VERIFICATION TEAM GUIDELINES:

Note to the new CEO: I think Bluesky should get rid of follower/following stats. The only status symbol on this app should be whether or not you are Jerrified.

we seriously need jerryfication on this app

THEY CANT KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH IT

did you know being Jerrified gets you access to the open bar

Day 1054 of being unverified on BlueSky and I had no idea about all these benefits, pretty sick —refurbished hotel room coffee maker of unknown origin —heist invitations in my DMs because no one knows who i am —shows my posts to November '24 joiners only —access to a shared Too Good To Go account

I’m going to guess “view full thread” contains at least one reason not to verify jerry

the uphill battle continues

that's right

was going to apply for the ceo position but candidates have to be verified :(

Good evening. "Unverified Jerry Chen" was a 34-month sociological experiment studying Poster's Madness conducted by Quinnipiac University. We are now complete with our study; thank you for your time.

mods have a chance to the funniest thing ever (reach unprecedented levels of cringe by verifying me)

Currently applying to bsky for a jeriffication tick so Jerry doesn't get it.

my replies have evolved from "jerry no" to "this is why they'll never verify you." and i think that's beautiful

the jerrified label unjerrifying him is top tier bit

Jerry's quest for verification is half the reason i log into the site everyday. i am inexplicably invested in this

getting verified on feb 29 this year!

they briefly tried verifying @jcsalterego.bsky.social. the system recoiled in pain, refusing to show skeets at all. Datacenters filled with an otherworldly screeching. They had no choice but to back out the change and scrub the log files. Soon, bsky came back online. But the system — It remembers.

that video of me celebrating getting verified is AI :(

how did the @jerrified.bsky.social labeler completely pass me by until now? smh I need to pay more attention

resubmitting my verification application in papyrus so the mods know i'm serious

@saxopharmaceutical.bsky.social as requested, you are no longer Jerrified 🫶

They blinked, @jcsalterego.bsky.social !! You did it!

(new wave of verifications on bluesky happening)

(cop about to retire voice) i'm just one good post away from verification

they're calling me the most unverified user on bluesky