the inventor of tolls: bridge better have my money

garlic knots are a great way for beginners to ease into eating pizza

Pack your bags because an all-new Trivia Murder Party is on its way! Get ready for our next killer standalone title featuring online matchmaking, as well as classic local play! 🏕️ Learn more about it in the Jackbox Direct! 🔗 jbgm.es/4ji2oih (Logo not final.)

(post-apocalypse dystopia where people who still know how to read are called wordwakers) Warlord: What does this one say, wordwaker? Me: Campbell’s chunky beef & vegetable

In this week’s newsletter, @lukevburns.bsky.social and I shared some funny writing by Mark Cowling, Seth Rubin, Maitreyi Anantharaman & @seanmcgowan.bsky.social in @pointsincase.com @mcsweeneys.net & @defector.bsky.social! Read and subscribe here!

my mark wahlberg piece got posted while i was recovering from having my titties scooped out of my chest and thrown in the trash. i have never felt more Masculine

Lady Gaga is back with a banger and I am back on @mcsweeneys.net mama!!! www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/var...

The Treasury Department right now. People are turning out against Musk and DOGE staging a takeover of the Treasury’s payment system. This crowd is big. The whole block is packed. “Lock him up,” everyone yells.

"Cage wanted you to listen to the sounds you usually ignore. Like people breathing and birds chirping. I wasn’t all that excited about it, but they told us if we didn’t do what they said, they’d sell us to Randy Quaid, and he’d hunt us for sport."

an instant classic

got a new piece in mcsweeney’s today. john cage’s ghost told me he liked it more than he was expecting to www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/an-...

you can pass whatever legislation you want, i will remain a perverted little gender freak until the day i die and i will spend the rest of my life telling kids how cool it is to be trans because it rules. thank you

i wrote about my ten favorite movies of the year and you can read it if you want! sethrubin.substack.com/p/my-10-favo...

with your swagger and your bearing and the just right clothes you’re wearing and your thieves, oh ohh your den of thieves

In this week's newsletter, @jamesfolta.com and I collect great writing by Talib Babb, Grace Fetterman, @setherubin.bsky.social, and @ginnyhogan.bsky.social & @lpevs.bsky.social. Plus, @markpaglia.bsky.social's latest solo RPG & my upcoming workshops. Check it out & subscribe here ⬇️

if the rapture happened on a southwest flight nothing would happen. every soul would make it to miami

back in mcsweeney’s today. i am deeply sorry to all french people

Here, standing at the top of the course with manliness and anticipation, I feel reverent and erect. I am full of pain and light. I am full of adrenaline and testosterone, chlorine and spit. Buzz. The Buzzer sounds. It is time.

i can’t wait for juror #2 2

i am going to serve cunt on hanukkah

how long does it take you guys to shuck your gelt

SAM SPADE (holding a gun on Peter Lorre): Giddyup, Jingle Horse. Kick up those feet.

During the Great Depression, FDR calmed a shaken nation's nerves with his Far Side chats where he would use the radio to describe the most recent Far Side comic.

why is survivor trying to recruit players with the feverish intensity of a post-9/11 u.s. military???

microwaved a plate of thanksgiving leftovers and it is truly a groundbreaking exploration of all the different temperatures food can be

top surgery consult included multiple specific warnings about not playing roller derby after surgery. gotta say they know their audience

sure, sex is great. but has anyone seen my car keys?