so who is this jesus guy everyone keeps talking about

Time to decorate Christmas cookies

One nil to the Avalanche

It’s the holidays, the time of the year when the whole family sits down together to watch the latest Knives Out movie. Oh hey! It’s time for the first confessional scene with Josh Brolin!

I really wish Pitt was in a Novelty Food Bowl

Yeah it wasn’t the best.

I’m home.

Pittsburgh weather: the answer to “Why didn’t I own sunglasses until my own wedding day?”

The new half of Pittsburgh airport is a barren wasteland at 2pm on Dec 23, which is very odd Also Franco having his own nook is funny

[first day as a shepherd] boss: where are you going? me: [pointing] star boss: what? why me: [shrugging] baby

The full spiked 60 Minutes CECOT package, clean & subtitled. 1/5

How small and insecure do you have to be to name something after yourself? We’ll discuss tonight on Next with Kyle Clark

The AC just kicked on, 3 days before Christmas

Nah he wants the hundred because that’s what shows up in movies

It’s pretty clear at this point that the only thing that matters to grandpa is putting his name on as many things as possible. I’m surprised he’s not on the hundred dollar bill yet. That’s gotta be his dream right?

this looks like the shittiest mobile game in the world. I bet you have to watch 4 ads in a row just to fire the guns once.

grats Bari, you've Streisand'd the story and I hope everyone watches it now and it haunts you forever.

and with the out of office set, I no longer have to wear pants until 2026

If you got a problem, yo, I'll solvent, check out the gunk, isopropyl dissolves it

I have been told that my nephews have discovered this so I expect to hear it 400,000 times a day for the next week

Me, yesterday to a friend I brought: “The seats are great but the bad thing is you can’t tell if a field goal is good” *a FG immediately doinks off of the upright* “Okay, except for that one.”

Like, don’t punch people. But also, fans at NFL games are truly awful sometimes. There isn’t a game yet I’ve been to without some drunk asshole being belligerent. I nearly saw two fights yesterday and they were all between Bronco fans and both guys were in their mid-50s. It’s Car Dealer Deathmatch

i like christopher nolan movies. i like when there's a sad guy and the music goes WUHHHHHHHHHH

ROC in/around the Christmas Tree

merry pitt/crit-mas

Huh, weird that this is only a problem with American wind farms and radar. Oh well!

I wonder what the Vengaboys are doing right now. I hope they’re well.

I thought state media would at least have more patriotic theme songs and flag animations

i wasn't on bluesky much during the game since I was there. Is everyone as mad at the refs as we were?

welp

I’m so mad

A photo that will never be used out of context

Anyone want some hot marshmallow in cocoa

Running disk defragmenter takes forever

seems legit

*my head starts shaking as eyes turn into onyx voids. My face splits in half and words not meant for utterance befoul this world as I implode into nothingness*

Terrifying headline if you don’t realize they are sports teams.

I don’t understand. How can I Grind To The Top of the Paradigm if I’m playing browser games

May the odds be ever in your favor

There’s so much here 1) the fact that a human still has to do all the grunt work 2) trademark AI sycophancy and memory limits immediately turn it to shit 3) absolutely predictable utter failure 4) deluded techbro at the end missing the point

I'm sure this one will be the one that succeeds and doesn't turn into deep bloodlust as soon as everyone realizes public services are required to live together

seems bad

Constable Furries Ireland, Petty Sessions Court Registers, 1828-1912

Yeah your LearnedLeague achievement ribbons are nice because you are “smart” and “know about musicals from 1937” but do you have the secret best one:

We're blowing ourselves up because grandpa decided culture war was more important than any livable future

can't wait to be chastised by blue-no-matter-who folks to vote for this guy

This is the reason for everything. Everything can be tied back to burning the life and world around us so a handful of people can append zeroes to their accounts.

Sorry, I'm not going back to Twitter to be some Holy Warrior for The Discourse against a bunch of bloviating white nationalists posting vigorous fellating of the worst people on earth