when someone tells me not to use em dashes because AI uses em dashes

Remember when she was recorded saying “Who gives a fuck about Christmas?” and how that would’ve been a “scandal” your racist uncle still crowed about if Michelle Obama had said it?

“Some fascists are more equal than others.”

"How do I deal with my conservative relatives at Thanksgiving dinner?" Baby, your uncle isn't a conservative. He just doesn't like black people. That's a racist.

"one of, if not the, best books You gotta stop doing that.

Good morning to Brazilian reporter Manuela Borges, who’s been waiting eleven years for this petty moment. ❤️ 🇧🇷

On one hand, yes, obviously this is/should be a massive story. On the other, I understand news orgs’ dilemma: News is NEW and while this is an escalation in rhetoric, it’s one of degree, not kind, so it may not count as “new”—at least not to readers, whose attention these orgs need to survive.

See, what these Chardonnay liberals don’t understand is that, while Trump was very explicit about his plans to wreck the climate and kill lots of people, the price of eggs was up by, like, 18%, and the two people who lost to him were icky lady-types. So, ya know, the choice was clear.

200K swing state voters who exclusively get their news from the Fart Brothers Podcast had no choice but to foist this nightmare on all of us because Taco Bell costs more than it used to

Conservatives are the obvious villains in every story, part 129

it's a hell of an act -- what do you call it

Conservatives are the obvious villains in every story, part 235: “The Present”

Conservatives are the obvious villains in every story, part 78 (this story) and part 79 (“A Christmas Carol”)

It shouldn’t be forgotten that a big piece of Mamdani’s campaign was simply “cities are cool and lots of people enjoy living in them” which in and of itself dismantles alot of rightwing talking points

Conservatives are the obvious villains in every story, part 1141

This is my neighbourhood; these are my neighbours.

Occam’s Racism at work again.

It's honestly astonishing that the people responsible for the incredible increase in housing costs, stagnant wages, and so much more in the last 30 years really convinced themselves that saving $5 a day is all you need to be able to afford a house.

We should have punished the Confederates.

Ooh! Ooh! I know this one! Because we don’t have a decades-old media ecosystem of caterwauling bad-faith actors preying on people’s fear and ignorance!

I think this messaging is important in context, but yes, that’s what they voted for. And they should have to grapple with that fact.

Dear ICE:

Quick question, what the fuck

We have nihilistic 8chan edgelords in charge of our nuclear arsenal because 30% of America still isn’t over the fact the South lost the Civil War

This is obviously correct, but I’d like to ask my smart followers a genuine follow-up question: What do we do next, when the Right starts predictably caterwauling about the “bias” shown by “left-wing” media not covering them? It’s just more grievance ammunition.

Conservatives are the obvious villains in every story, part 673

I'm so proud of everyone from my old neighborhood of Rogers Park in Chicago. I see what you have been and are doing. I am so proud of how organized the community is and how much more so everyone is becoming. It is inspiring. Just one example... And this is something EVERYONE can do. Everyone.

Rogers Park!

This is almost as bad as the infestation NYC saw in the 1970s, in which violence would often break out between the Baseball Furies and the Gramercy Riffs or you'd be caught in a rumble between the Lizzies and the Boppers. Terrifying times.

The flash apparently official. CBS News died at 1pm central standard time, 2pm eastern standard time, some 38 minutes ago.

Imagine if newspapers instead wrote something like, "According to police, the suspect tried to hit the officers with his car. In 35 out of 37 statements issued by this department over the past 5 years, police gave false initial statements, later contradicted by their own bodycam footage."

What if george mclellan was a groyper bsky.app/profile/jack...

Dude is from NY state. Cue the @harebrained.bsky.social.

I was quite literally taught this in my very first journalism class: You don’t say what people believe because you can’t verify it. You say what people SAY they believe.

1. All those “good guy with a gun” people are pretty quiet, I notice. 2. Can we stop saying this was an “assassination”? Chris Rock had a whole bit about this that applies here. www.reddit.com/r/StandUpCom...

Bored to Death

Sorry, folks. Sounds like the civil war has been postponed due to white shooter

Today's a day you can let out your true controversial opinions on any other issues than the topic of the day and it'll fly under the radar. “EdTV” is not just superior to, but VASTLY superior to “The Truman Show.”

This explains it better than I can

are we going to be sending the national guard to utah now to stop crime or is that reserved for cities with "other" people?

This goes out to you know who! #chicago

Can not undersell how stunningly beautiful the weather in Chicago is today. All the fascists can eat shit.

The good news is I get to deploy this old gem again.

“Chicago is a lot of things, but it’s certainly not a ‘hellhole,’ as claimed by the convicted felon, sexual predator, and pathological liar in the White House.” In fact, Chicago is a city of fierce defiance. My free Stop the Presses newsletter.

HEY, DUMMY:

Once again, behold the unparalleled parsimony & explanatory power of the Dennis Green Unified Theory Of 🇺🇸 Politics

hwatevah one mahht say for Lee and his ordahs, and this and that military wisdom and so on, one must agree that Pickett's chahge was ah prahme example of "livin mas". unfortunately for the men undah his command it also led to dyin mas