The Millennium Prayer is a genuine contender for worst song of all time. An attack of gastric diarrhoea at a funeral of a record. #totp

Cliff in his fullest ‘dead behind the eyes’ era #totp

I don't really talk about this, because I'm actually quite private about my personal life, but many many years ago Tony Head took me under his wing and showed me the kind of person I could be. It's not an exaggeration to say that I'm the person I am today because of the kindness he showed me.

I'm not really selling my work at the moment, due to circumstances, but you can still buy my T shirts. www.redbubble.com/i/t-shirt/Ti...

I’m happy to pay for your substack to help you out, but for fuck’s sake don’t expect me to read it.

Why do I have to go to the local news section to find this story? Where are the protests demanding an end to the epidemic of white Brits murdering minorities? Will there be a national debate on the ills of cocaine abuse amongst white men?

It can’t just be me who sees ‘Bari Weiss’ and thinks ‘… saved my life’

Seems like I’m always asking for help on here and I hate doing it but we don’t have any other options. Please please can you have a look at, or share, our GFM for a new power wheelchair for MrsHackenbush.

Stewart Lee was brilliant tonight: "If you're unsure of which toilets you can use feel free to shit in a bag and mail it to Graham Linehan, he sorts through them by hand"

Anti-white racism is an invention of white racists.

it is with heavy heart that I have decided, after thirty-four years of continuous service to rock-and-roll, to stop carrying a plectrum around with me

Farage is a hateful, evil piece of shit. If you disagree, you’re either stupid or the same as him.

Desiccated Tory pissbag still being given time of day for some reason, survey reveals

The Fire Brigades Union has made a statement on the proposed EHRC Code of Practice on Services. Our message is clear. Equality matters, solidarity is essential, and we will continue to fight for both.

We thought he’d be Bob Paisley, but he turned out to be Joe Fagan. A decent fella, no question. All the best, Arne. #LFC

Exactly this. I have no interest in seeing these films and have no idea who they’re intended for or what their appeal will be.

I’m So Cool by the Bedflowers.

Whoever wins, let’s hope Enrique immediately announces he’s leaving for Liverpool.

Arne Slot won Liverpool the title and for that he should be fondly remembered by supporters. Equally, he simply had to go after last season. Yes, mitigating circumstances, and one particularly tragic one at that, but there is a baseline when you manage a club of this size and he fell way below that.

Absolute State of the Union.

Absolutely shocking how easy this is.

Electronic: Getting Away With It.

Always been convinced that people who muster around the entrances of Oxford Circus, blocking the stairs, are prime cunts. Proof beyond doubt today when I happened upon Piers Corbyn and his scumbag cronies doing just that.

RIP Sonny Rollins. I’m not sure which I like more: his solo on the Rolling Stones’ Waiting On A Friend or the fact he hated the Stones and only recorded it because his wife told him to.

Maybe it’s because I no longer produce dopamine, but I get literally no enjoyment out of social media these days. I’d bin it, but what could possibly replace the hours of aimless joy-free scrolling?

Me too, ex-WHSmith high street chain. Me too.

This has not been Liverpool’s worst season by any means, but I can’t recall one that I’ve been more relieved to see the back of. Thoroughly wretched for a multitude of reasons. Consign it to memory and start afresh next term. Whoever’s in charge, whoever’s on the pitch, we’ll always be here. #LFC

‘Alice Doesn’t Live Anymore’

The Running Man. Such a shame.

With all due respect, both of these teams are terrible and whichever comes up to the PL will 100% be relegated.

Meanwhile, in an alternative timeline …

Halfway through, I realised the futility of this, but struggled manfully on anyway: You’ve Got To Hide Your Love Away I’ve Just Seen A Face I’m Looking Through You Got To Get You Into My Life Getting Better Martha My Dear Old Brown Shoe Come Together I’ve Got A Feeling The Long and Winding Road

Remember: fuck the EHRC. They shit on equality and piss in the face of human rights. Disband this hypocritical, incompetent hate machine and let people live their goddamn lives.

By the way, I'm always suspicious of screenshot posts that cut off halfway through a paragraph, so I do encourage everybody to read the whole thing to see this isn't out of context. Beyond being a grim attack on trans people, what also comes across most strongly is that it's just an unworkable mess.

I don't think it's a good idea to legally privilege someone else's discomfort over another person's rights.

Hasn't even been a year and Zohran's governance is having a massive impact on my family. Our daycare was able to open a 15-seat 3K program because of the 2,000 extra seats the admin funded. Everyone we know got in somewhere they wanted. This is gonna save us almost 50 grand.

I write to torture myself with visions of a better life. And it’s cheaper than heroin.

Iraola kindly telling Bournemouth to concede a late goal to make it more likely Liverpool finish fifth and thus are in the Champions League when he takes over as head coach 👍

the overwhelming message the AI industry has sent to young people is “this will ruin any chance you have at a stable career”, of course college grads are booing it regardless of the reality of the claims, the way this technology has been sold is one of the greatest self-inflicted PR disasters ever

American money is behind so much of the UK far right, from little Tommy to anti-abortion activism. It’s not even hidden

An emotional send off for the man who cost United an absolute fortune and didn’t win the league or the Champions League.

As high-profile websites vanish, it’s a reminder that the web has no built-in archival layer. But some publishers are now blocking the Wayback Machine. What’s at stake if the web stops being archived? Our new FAQ explains: preserving the public record matters. 🌐📚 help.archive.org/help/faq-pub...

There has been a defection today. I had to search hard to find it but there's a video statement on his facebook page. refukked.lovable.app

I’ve always been broadly supportive of the Liverpool ownership but another season of SlotBall is going to wipe out all my remaining goodwill. Barring a miracle, we will be next season’s Tottenham. #LFC

And now attention turns to the FA Cup Final, where the most despicable cheats in the history of the English game will battle it out. Whether the victors are the human-rights-abusing petrostate sportswashers or the private-equity player-churn financial dopers, football is unquestionably the loser.

The brief flurry of external interest in Europe’s most tedious, predictable and barely watchable farmer’s league is over.

points deduction for the pitch invasion #thefootball

It would be no loss whatsoever to the country if that pack of flag-wanking, window-licking, shit-eating racists shambling through London right now were permanently exiled into another dimension. They contribute absolutely nothing and are a drain on the national psyche.