This is why the X-Files’ 2016 return was such a shambles. It was possible to believe ln aliens and immortal stretchy perverts making nests out of bile, but not that the FBI would rehire Mulder and Scully after all the previous shenanigans, let alone redecorate their office to the exact 1993 specs.

Chaotic travellers give me the absolute fantods. Watching people running up a platform less than a fucking minute before the train departs brings me out in hives.

Pure Twitter brain. They somehow think that engagement on the hate app from bots and mad Americans equates to the feelings of real people in the UK.

Pure Twitter brain. They somehow think that engagement on the hate app from bots and mad Americans equates to the feelings of real people in the UK.

Igor Two Door Cinema Club.

London in springtime ain’t so bad.

UP THE VILLA

Press day! My Ada print is featured in this month’s HomeStyle magazine. Designed in my little studio in Manchester, now on national newsstands. Not bad, eh? www.gailmyerscough.co.uk/product-page...

Have the government waded in on this yet? No? You astound me.

*wearily drags out the Yes Minister clip again*

If Reform and the Tories are mistaking Twitter engagement for what people in the UK actually think, long may it continue.

Infuriating that we’re STILL sticking with two chronically out of form players and not giving Rio a chance, even deep into a turgid game like this. #LFC

Thirty-odd games and commentators are still expressing surprise at Mo playing poorly.

Couldn't get it out of my head, so now it's on here.

Depressing number of meme-dead replies saying ‘that isn’t John Cleese’ 🙄

Amazed by how many people can remember what they read before the age of eleven. Aside from a handful of semi-recognisable nostalgia sparks I can’t quite understand, I have no memories whatsoever of anything before my teens. Even they’re starting to blur now.

Lib Dem Leader Ed Davey: "Tax exiles like Isabel Oakeshott and washed up old footballers who mock ordinary people who stay in the UK and pay our taxes... As we protect them, it's only right for tax exiles to start paying taxes to fund our armed forces, just like the rest of us".

All screengrabs from Twitter are now blocked or muted. Thanks.

FIFA presumably about to confirm Russia as replacement for Iraq in the World Cup, plus a bonus Peace Prize for Benjamin Netanyahu

In order to understand UK politics in 2026 you must realise that a plumber & plasterer doesn't represent the interests of the working class because she is left-wing but a wealthy broadcaster & former academic does represent the interests of the working class because he is right-wing. Hope this helps

Chelsea looking good for matching the record for most red cards in a Premier League season (two more required).

John Cleese in the Seventies: one of Britain’s greatest comic geniuses John Cleese in 2026:

This tweet preceeds and anticipates deaths in Operation Epic Fury by almost 15 years

Same energy.

Fair play to the United lot. Excellent work.

Is there an option to keep both and get rid of John Cleese

I am pro Iranian people. I stand with them against their own government’s repression AND against the imperial violence in the form of bombs dropped from the sky from Israel & the US who have already killed hundreds. I support neither imperialism or dictatorship. Sahar Delijani said it best:

If America still had the rule of law, this would be the easiest prosecution ever, but we all know absolutely nothing will happen.

On a 8am train from Dortmund to Stuttgart (3.5 hours, total price €30) and these lads were drinking pints for €2.50, literally cheaper than my coffee. Another world is possible

This is good. observer.co.uk/news/opinion...

Too many who should know better are backing this war. It wouldn't be happening if a) Trump were a remotely serious president who knew the risks of embarking on something whose aims he still can't specify, and b) Netanyahu wasn't embracing regional chaos as his get out of jail free card.

Some ends justifying the means bullshit already seeping in, I see

"The Islamists oppose women getting an education," I mutter, as I aim my missile at the girls school

Americans do not want this. They do not want another war in pursuit of regime change. They want relief from the affordability crisis. They want peace.

Today’s military strikes on Iran — carried out by the United States and Israel — mark a catastrophic escalation in an illegal war of aggression. Bombing cities. Killing civilians. Opening a new theater of war.

War and mass casualties are never a "distraction". They are an abomination. But saying the war on Iran is a distraction from Epstein is especially ridiculous:

Fucksake, BBC, this is a hell of a mishearing

My husband @mjowen174.bsky.social is very down and it’s difficult to see. He had a thriving writing business until AI came along but now he’s struggling to find work. Please repost this far and wide in the hope that he can find some writing work. www.mathew-owen.co.uk

Influencers all need to be transported to the nearest live volcano and dropped in. Or at least banned from posing and flouncing around a very busy display in an exhibition. Other people are not background noise to your main character syndrome.

Operation ‘everything wrong with the U.S. in two words’

I know it's not the main issue, but what's the FIFA protocol for when a host nation for a world cup attacks or declares war against a participating nation in the run up to the competition? especially when the head of the host nation is in receipt of your inaugural peace prize?

‘This cherry pie is fucking RAW!’

Less than 1% of the Kansas population are trans, yet rather than let them live their lives in peace, the rabidly fascist Republican legislature are openly persecuting them. Absolutely sickening, absolutely evil.

Me when someone asks if the Telegraph is worth reading

The bad thing about this happening in a Labour seat is it gives the press a big excuse to ignore the fact Reform’s strategy is failing. They’ve now lost 3 in a row in 3 different countries to 3 different parties because their plan of coming through a split vote isn’t working. Their vote is too low

‘hi, grandma? can u come pick me up from my rap battle? it's over. no, i lost. he saw u drop me off & did a pretty devastating rhyme about it’