Same

Despondent Shohei Ohtani Figured He Would Have Met Steve-O After 8 Years In U.S. https://theonion.com/despondent-shohei-ohtani-figured-he-would-have-met-steve-o-after-8-years-in-u-s/

We wondered why the dog kept sniffing one spot on the deck, figured out why:

The best part of Brisco County Jr is the obvious joy Bruce Campbell took in playing the character

Kid2 apparently got a little crazy with the markers at school today (me to wife: “was she trying to eat it?”)

Me telling the 10 year old that yes he does have to listen to @itschristmastown.bsky.social in the car with me because @davidjroth.bsky.social and @mobute.bsky.social are my friends

Me: this reads like the author is an ai evangelist/booster/investor Googles him - he’s an ai evangelist/booster/investor (interesting that this wasn’t disclosed in the article)

I believe that the assassination attempts on Trump have been real and not some planned conspiracy but if a pollster asked me about it i would absolutely say I'm sure they're fake because fuck Trump. I'm picking the "fuck Trump" response to every single question

Sitting at a bar with the 10 year old having a drink (him: lemonade, me: old fashioned) waiting for a carryout order and watching the Avs whilst also getting dirty looks from all the old drunks at the bar, 12/10 would recommend

Love watching hockey and seeing all the names I learned from Shoresy

The Purcell Principle means it always too late for courts to fix something racist and never too late for states to do something racist

This guarantees I will never see a movie at Alamo ever again lol open.substack.com/pub/embedded...

Roberts dropping that “we’re not political actors” quote and doing this 96 hours later is nasty work

Accidentally bought a loud “crackling” candle and it’s driving both me and the dog crazy

Ha speak of the devil and he shall appear, things of that nature

marjorie taylor green can get fucked for all eternity, what is wrong with people

[at the last judgment] JESUS: And the baby prisons? EVANGELICALS: to own the libs, right JESUS: And the libs, who are they EVANGELICALS: uh mostly illegal aliens. if we really hate a pretty girl we call her fatherless. some widows JESUS: Alien, fatherless, widow, got it. So you see these millstones

Something I’ll keep in mind when you send me alumni mailers asking for money, IU

AOC is right to say this, and anyone who attacks her for it is wrong. And AOC should under no circumstances be labeled antisemitic.

“Why are young people fleeing religion?”

Any "leftist" taking MTG's side over AOC's is either an op or the biggest mark at the carnival

Sometimes you need a cheat day (quarter pounder with cheese and baskin robbins)

I really fucking needed this. Not as bad as my client, who's been locked up by ICE for over a year. But his case really hurt and I needed to win it for him and for me.

We are *never* going to have a real conversation about immigration in this country, or probably any country. A real conversation would start with recognising that there is no reasoned opposition to immigration, it's a mental illness that needs treatment on a social and personal level.

Dog owners: oh I prepped for months to adopt! Cat owners: I found him in the trash

Ok this one’s good

I mean, at least he has good taste in bourbon

you will play fat fox and you will like it

I know my anxiety is (slightly?) improving because I’m going through Amazon and doing returns on all the stupid purchases I made recently

It’s that time again

If you saw this happening in another country, what would you call it? https://newrepublic.com/post/210013/fbi-investigation-atlantic-reporter-kash-patel-drinking

Practicing self care (booking a family trip to my favorite mountain town - Breckenridge- for the 4th of July weekend)

Just made myself an amaretto old fashioned (sub amaretto for the simple syrup, light on the bitters, woodford reserve double oaked for the base). 10/10 highly recommend Shoutout to the local dim sum place who had a similar cocktail that inspired me to try it

Ag secretary confirming 1 in 4 US farmers has no fertilizer secured, American Farm Bureau survey says up to 70% can’t afford enough fertilizer for the season under the spiked costs Honestly shocked this isn’t bigger news. 25% of farms are just not planting at all this season. Farm bankruptcy up 46%

if ai ever works as it’s been sold to us, the most easily replaced employee of every company would be ceo and as far as i can tell theres never been a single article written about that

Realizing the snow tonight may get in the way of my planned heist (throwing away old rugs in the construction dumpster 2 doors down)

CASE DISMISSED

holy shit learn how to be journalists again, i beg you

Seriously what the hell

What the hell, Colorado

It remains a staggering flex how Andre Braugher, apparently unsatisfied with being the finest dramatic actor on television, went on to become the best comedic actor on television.

the thing dem pols need to internalize is this guy and his entire family will vote republican for the rest of their lives, regardless of the republican party literally ending their livelihood

There you have it. Anyone telling you to vote for Shapiro or that they're voting for Shapiro is a Republican. Shapiro is a spiteful piece of shit and too emotional to lead.

Live your life in such a way that your descendants never find you in a similar MAGA database someday.

Of all the things that won’t happen this is one of the won’t-happen-est

Buffalo Hunt, by John Dare Howland, 1868

This is one of the most quietly revolutionary things any city can do to improve kids' lives & outcomes. If you genuinely care about kids having access to education or safe after school spaces & activities, then fund your libraries, staff your libraries, & make every public school ID a library card.