sherman, for the love of god!

she Götter on my dämmer till i rung

Jeremy does not give a single shit

Everyone say hello to Tupi, a lil’ capybara baby at the San Antonio Zoo. 🥹

You obviously can't trust it just any time an author might say a thing like this, but Faulkner was real for this one

I see and I hear and I speak no evil; I carry no malice within my breast; yet quite without wishing a man to the Devil one may be permitted to hope for the best. -“An Ethical Grook” by Piet Hein

"Pat, why do you carry that ridiculous 600mm lens on long hikes?" Buddy, I can see mountains reflected in the eyes of a trailside pika.

Please enjoy 2 minutes and 12 seconds of Jeremy enjoying a prickly pear. (Note: it switches from delightful ASMR to lots of dog panting at about the one minute mark, when Octopus Moonshine finds us.)

when they close it all up, I do believe this will go down as the funniest video on the internet

Why yes, there *is* video

I remembered suddenly after all these months--the joke was when one of the kids coming to Andy's party had what looked like a small present but then they turn and the present was actually very long and thin

This is so good

Why would I care if bluesky is allegedly dying--none of you assholes were liking my posts anyway

TIL: When the Original Star Wars Trilogy finally aired on Chilean TV in 2003, the network spliced custom beer commercials into the films themselves to avoid cutting to commercial breaks. these additional scenes turn Obi-Wan & Luke into raging space alcoholics who are constantly shotgunning booze.

Corgis have an extremely low center of gravity and the density of a dead star. PERFECT for skateboarding! 😇

They did a memorial to the P00P Scorebug. Gone but never forgotten.

Panzy the tort working on a watermelon rind on this 100° afternoon (tagging @blueheronfarm.bsky.social per usual because tortoise) #tortoise #reptiles #dog #pets

Q: Why can’t flintknappers get dates? A: Because they’re always flaking! #archaeology #archeology #dadjokes

ken just sent me this please enjoy

A #squirrel gets gently brushed and clearly enjoys it. When the scratching stops, it taps for more. This reaction is common in #mammals, as grooming and gentle touch can trigger calming responses and even release endorphins.

Who up widening they gyre

If you love your library, listen up…

Dancing Water Sausage!!! Fun Fact: I wrote/recorded the music for this one! It’s not amazing or anything, but hey… I did it all by myself!

RANKING LITERALLY EVERY PROPHET IN THE BIBLE BY HOW GOOD OF A POSTER THEY WOULD BE IN ALPHABETICAL ORDER NO I AM NOT KIDDING (1/69)

talking to a tattoo artist to get this entire sequence tattooed on me gotdamn

This cute bunny making her bed is exactly what I needed today 💗 🎥rabbitsig

When you make sure your friends get to eat too. #dogs

Most human thing you’ll ever see a cat do

While half-asleep I imagined a youtube channel called "Anatomy of a Bit" that made overwrought, really self-serious video essays analyzing totally unremarkable jokes from movies and TV. I specifically imagined a video about some joke from Toy Story, but I can't remember what joke 🫨🫨🫨

The gf was showing me a video of a bulldog skateboarding so I had to dig up this video of Max with his spider-man skateboard 🥲🥲🥲

Sharing this primarily so I remember to check it out later when I'm not at work

Snack time!

Exciting news! We’re thrilled to announce that tapir Yuna gave birth to a rare and endangered Malayan tapir calf Sunday night. The newborn, covered in distinctive white spots and stripes resembling a fuzzy walking watermelon, is only the second tapir born in our 120-year history.

I think I'm most likely going to forget that I have tomorrow off for mlk day and accidentally work anyway. I work from home so I might get a lot done before I realize. Dystopian

*never heard of bots voice* it's so cool that so many people have been following me right after they first make their accounts, before even posting or anything. They must be joining just for me 🙂

Somebody gave herself a hotspot and has to wear pajamas now.🥺

All the bots following me would get so many more follows back if they also liked at least one of my skeets. I'd be so flattered

I can never become an artist because I'm pretty sure I would name and organize my layers in a straightforward and comprehensible way, and if an artist does that the muses smite them

There are Rabbits. And some of them are pissed off