I lived my life not knowing who Paul Dano is just fine and now suddenly everyone has an opinion on him that I have to see like 500+ times a day

once you're burdened with the knowledge of making perfect scrambled eggs you can never go back to eating crummy scrambled eggs

Am I alone in feeling more offended by people using the term ‘poop/poopy’ in lieu of ‘shit/shitty’? It makes me actually think of poop, which grosses me out way more, whereas the later just means ‘terrible’ to me. “I feel like shit” Yeah, me too buddy. “I feel poopy” Okay, gross.

The big question every year is are you a ‘dressing up on thanksgiving’ family, or a ‘sweats and PJs on thanksgiving’ family

As someone who has made paper chain garlands their whole life seeing it trending on TikTok this year, here’s some advice. Use a stapler. I keep seeing people using glue and saying it takes hours, just use staples and it’ll cut down your time by at least half!

Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind

we need a department of kerning

Lemon (poppyseed) shark bread 🦈 🍋

Studio Ghibli, Bandai Namco, Square Enix demand OpenAI stop using their content to train AI

Daily bunny no.3116 flying south for the winter

IT’S THAT TIME OF YEAR, ANNUAL LOUIE ZONG GHOST MV 👻 🎃 💕 youtu.be/m8eFOKYQcfA?...

Side note: it seems like a great time to be in the inflatable mascot costume business

hands: the original tortilla press

i want computer to make movie for me. i want computer to talk to me. i want computer to take my job. i want to fuck computer. i want computer to mock and devalue the very spark of ingenuity and creativity that makes us human

caught my vampire neighbor creeping through my front door. he claims my saying “for sure dude, we should definitely hang out sometime” the other night counts as an invitation, but I disagree. we’re on hold with the etiquette hotline

How rfk jr seems to think this works

Robin Williams' daughter has some quality thoughts on AI slop

look ai is completely destroying the world with massive pollution and is using up water at a concerning rate but at least you get to use technology that lies to you and is the primary propaganda mechanism by fascists

(guy about to invent the wedge salad) i ain't taking all those leaves apart

Have the feeling some T Swift fans will start claiming her new album is actually a meta parody of pop music, so really it’s bad on purpose and that’s what makes it super deep

Meet your FAT BEAR WEEK 2025 champion. Chunk the Hunk. The Chunkster. 32 Chunk. All hail the new king of Brooks River 👑

lets go ghouls

The richest man on earth owns X. The second richest man on earth is about to be a major owner of TikTok. The third richest man owns Facebook, Instagram, and WhatsApp. The fourth richest man owns The Washington Post. See the problem here?

Democracy isn’t dead

Can I just say, I hate how people say “drone” and either mean a little flying camera robot used by YouTubers, or a deadly unmanned military aircraft? “Drone spotted” WHAT KIND?? Start using a different word for them please?? It’s like using the word to describe a kid’s toy plane and also an F-22

telling my boss I’m going to fuck up roughly 30% of the time and it’s math’s fault

Things were better when computer was in room. Now everywhere is computer. This is bad. Computer should never have escaped room.

I'm not sure about this branding but I'm not the billionaire business genius

“🥺 What if we kissed under the 12-foot golden statue of Donald Trump holding a Bitcoin…? 👉👈”

There should be a special button for going back to the interesting thing you glanced right before the timeline refreshed.

Polyphemus after Odysseus doxxed himself

There are few things as annoying as finding a tasty looking recipe only to find it requires a bunch of pre-made mixes and ingredients that are either sold by that influencer in their expensive webshop, or are US-only products

Today I discovered that oxi-action (oxiclean) removes ink stains off tables, if that helps anyone else

none of the gotcha examples of "out-of-control scientific spending" bother me in the slightest. isn't science about finding shit out? "they spent a million dollars of taxpayer money to see if they could make mice sexier" okay, well, what was the answer? I want to know too

Somehow they’ve found a way to make the epidemic of terrible podcasts flooding the internet even worse

lately when i’m feeling hopeless i just think of the Katamari cat wearing scuba gear. if she can survive in an inhospitable environment then so can i

Sweeney Todd answers important questions like “what if Bathsheba’s husband miraculously came back years later and murdered King David and all his associates?”

Yup.

Immediately adding this into my lexicon.

Just got my new Covid booster (and flu shot)! This article has good info about what’s going on right now, but things are changing daily, so even if your state is listed here as not being available check anyway. And if you have access, don’t assume it will continue. defector.com/how-the-fuck...

Millennials are middle aged now but not me. I stayed young somehow

pentagon rn

One of my top internet pet-peeves is when a video says "I Spent 24 Hours in ____" and they were there for 12 hours MAX

Hi authors! Please remember to file a claim!

can my car be sad ? is my tv suffering from loneliness ? do I need to hug my microwave ? people selling you those things say yes