29 bells.

Fuck yesssss goooooooo

That is not coming home with us, sir.

Lol this is such bullshit. I went to law school and the federalist society was the single loudest group in the school and 75% of the membership were blonde white girls

I'm sitting in the waiting room while my partner is in surgery. Send me stuff? Pet pics, memes, cool stuff you make, dad jokes, tell me a good movie you saw recently, something that makes you happy, whatever is most on your wheelhouse

The incoming mayor of NYC has seen Alf hog

When you recount this election day:

Sure squeaky toys are great, but have you considered just removing the squeaker and going feral on it like a fox hunting lemmings?

I know all eyes are on NYC right now, but save a thought for Seattle hopefully telling Bruce Harrell to fuck off today too publicola.com/2025/10/16/i...

In case this hasn't been said here yet.

This is how I found out

I guess he's just going to sit in the rain in the middle of am empty field until I find him a dog to play with. I tried to explain to him about 2pm on a Monday but he was having none of it.

Tolkien is not perfect but he did, in fact, hate the fucking Nazis.

Actually, seeing a man of color, getting scared, and calling The Police, is pretty typical racist behavior

I am describing my politics as “arachno-communism” from now on

I learn a lot about ppl's backstory by their response to Polaris's name. In order of commonality: 1. What's that? 2. Like the north star? Yes. 3. Like the comic book character? No. 4. Like the snow machine? No, but hi fellow Michiganders etc! 5. Like the submarine? No, but that's a new one!

I just don’t understand how they thought “ha ha ha this loser can’t afford child care in the city I’m currently mayor of” would be a good look.

I call my mom's bff Aunt and her kids cousins. I call my mom's 2nd cousin my Uncle. I call my half brother's (unrelated to me) family grandma, grandpa, uncles, aunts, and cousins. People refer to chosen and blood family by the term that best describes their relationship. Please be normal.

I love when the submission grinder asks me if a submission is really still pending. it's like when streaming services ask if I'm still watching. the answer yes. the answer will always be yes. we have always lived in the submission grinder.

"Tzefardea Tzedek" (Frog of Righteousness) As soon as the Portland Frog became a meme, Jewish social media blew up with jokes about the 2nd Passover plague - tzefarde'a (frogs) - and the Rabbinical commentary around it. I knew I had to make a calligraphy piece encompassing all of it. (more in alt.)

Much like Missy Elliott, Polaris can't stand the rain.

I need to talk to someone who knows about overland lithium ore transportation safety (or, in general, hazardous ore transportation). The heist I need this information for IS fictional, your honor

Polaris's muppet friend came by for a visit (sound on for some very silly noises)

"Oxford commas are a sign you write with ai" I will find such a unique way to rip out your spine that they'll make a movie about it

finally some good news

sir

give this guy an Emmy for dialogue

A chilling lack of remorse

I also got a skull and cross bones tattoo when I was younger, put me in the senate

I also got a skull and cross bones tattoo when I was younger, put me in the senate

good dog

My poor boy got stung by a wasp and now he's on all the sleepy drugs

I don't really care about the white house but it is very funny to me that the dude elected by the RETVRN "we don't build beautiful things like we used to because something something multiculturalism" crowd just took a tacky gold plated shit on the kind of architecture they fetishize

I don't even know how to access it and I will never learn. Do you go to a website? Download an app? Lick an electrical outlet? Don't know don't care

I loves this weirdo

oh you're a nihilist? name one 19th century russian tsar you assassinated with a bomb

simultaneously delighted and horrified to report that my mom is entering her 'wine mom' phase

No notes

I get paid 7 figures a year to come up with this shit. Some stuff I have cooking up for you to look forward to: Amazon Prime changing to Amazon Plus. Paramount Plus changing to Paramount Now. HBO Max changing to just HBO. I fucking hate all of you and I will never stop.

"It Was Cold": Mothers Who Lost Children to Gun Violence Say Harrell Ignored Their Pleas for Help “What mothers go through in crisis is not a one-time opportunity—it’s ongoing." publicola.com/2025/10/16/i...

my god there has never been a more accurate use of this

My partner is having top surgery beginning of November so if you are looking for any plushies, now would be a great time to order one! I'll be putting some more up as time allows so check back #bsnm findyourfamiliar.bigcartel.com/products

A massive park that's full of life size dinosaur (and dinosaur like) animatronics with realistic feathers where appropriate. Go down a water slide that deposits you in trexs mouth. Escape room where you have to evade velociraptors. scuba dive with liopleuradan

he was always a fraud but this is such a predictable turn. it's almost as if his primary fan base was democrat leaning wine moms who hate all of this lmao

Spotlighting more 2022-23 gender-expanding genre fiction: “Vagabonds!” Eloghosa Osunde “The Deep Sky” @yumewrites.bsky.social “The Water Outlaws” @slhuang.com “If You Find Yourself Speaking to God, Address God with the Informal You” @johnchu.bsky.social “A Feast for Flies” @leighharlen.bsky.social

my dad and I don't talk much anymore, he's more red flags than green, but in middle/high school he did take me to my favorite bookstore once a month to buy me a giant chocolate chip cookie and any (paperback) book that I wanted and that was extremely cool.