Not the point of this post, but with his hand raised, he becomes 5’6”

The iPad shows the clip of Alex Jones losing Infowars.

I’m sorry, but when it comes to a box of chocolates, I would actually like to know what I’m gonna get.

I love when a Chinese restaurant has a cuck chair.

Using Nancy Pelosi to solicit donations is some galaxy brained shit.

Rax is bringing OJ the Alien back onto our timelines. Thank you.

“The creating is the fun part”

havent watched yet but what a fucking title www.youtube.com/watch?v=uox4...

One of my favorite McSweeney’s of all time.

AEW PPVs rule because there is almost 100% chance you will see both the Costco guy AND a skull crack open

AEW’s Double or Nothing PPVs haven’t always been my favorite, but goddamn if the last two years’ events haven’t been damn near wall-to-wall bangers.

The greatest wrestling feud of all time is Darby Allin vs his own spine. #AEWDoN

Shoutout to Jericho, the Elite, the Hurt Syndicate, and Jack Perry on deciding to go with “wedding DJ” for their Stadium Stampede gear. #AEWDoN

Thekla should have like five different barcode tattoos. #AEWDoN

When a WWE troll calls AEW a “glorified stunt show,” has anyone ever replied with, “Well yeah, because that kinda what pro wrestling is.”

Mox vs Kyle is a great battle against two very similar but different types of wrestling perverts. #AEWDoN

It’s ok, Konosuke Takeshita, you may not have a family anymore, but you’ll always have Cinnabon. #AEWDON

A Prime bottle

Went to an anti AI datacentre protest march today and a friend of mine got a picture that summed it all up

If I’m not evolved enough to understand it, then why did they have to steal my writing to train it?

This online auction item will easily clear 500 billion dollars.

This is the same guy who went to a UFC fight the same weekend he went to war with Iran. Jesus Christ, this is so funny.

Change the owl to a cigarette and call it Heaters.

*Tipping fedora to my wife* Join me for a cum, m’lady?

Lmao

Fresh new American dystopia headline just dropped www.thegamer.com/grammacracke...

They mean as acceptable targets

I think the reason I've been a little ambiently mad all day is because January 6th rioters are statistically the most likely group of pedophiles in the world and they clubbed a guy to death and they're going to be rich from the tax money that I give to the country I live in.

I quickly became the “funny guy” employed at the Comedy Mother Ship by saying stuff like, “I need to go to the bathroom take a mental health dump.”

Just got out of Obsession, and I too write “Do not eat” on my pill bottles.

It’s actually Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein’s monster.

I’m an entry level siren.

Martha Marcy May Marlene and Grogu

He’s going to kill Patrick Mahomes

COSTCO: here, try this ME: oh yummy COSTCO: so you like it? ME: yes, it's delicious COSTCO: well, we don’t sell it anymore and you'll never see it again.

If I may…

I could fix Gina Carano and Sydney Sweeney, I just don’t feel like it.

Hard LOL

It has come to my attention that Silent Hill is located in St. Louis.

Look at my FBI Director, dawg…

doing whatever it takes to make jodie foster think you’re cool

🦋NO ICE IN KC. 🦋 TAKE THE PLEDGE. Kansas City should be a sanctuary, not a hunting ground. Today, KC DSA and KC Ice Free are officially launching The Monarch Pledge, a commitment to keep ICE out of our neighborhoods and protect our undocumented neighbors from the machinery of deportation.

Killtony! Killtoni! Killtoné!

Her: I bet he’s thinking about other women. Me: WHAT KINDA IRISH IS YOUR GRANDDAD!?

Men: What’s stopping you from looking like this?

Today’s the only day you can post this.

Fuck it. AEW should take place at other sports practice venues. Fastbrawl at batting cages, 2-Point Collision on a practice field, Body Slam Dunk on in an outdoor basketball court, Sudden Death on an air hockey table.