I see the libs are still somehow blaming leftists for Kamala losing. It’s astounding to have the amount of tolerance for cognitive dissonance necessary to both believe leftists are powerful enough to tip an election and also too small to consider as more than fringe

Collected another masters degree because why not.

Like tossing pieces of candy from an Apache helicopter over Saigon

We've gotten to the asking for proof of life stage of our gerontocracy.

Some people say baseball is boring, I say it builds community

Just spent 20 minutes speaking with Mitch McConnell. He was in good spirits, no he’s not a spirit that’s just a saying, being in good spirits. He is DEFINITELY not a ghost clawing at a bloated corpse as the flames of hell lick at his heels.

It’s very cool when something refuses to play because an ad won’t load

I don’t understand how people can run for office knowing they have insane baggage and/or crimes. Like I spent the entire campaign expecting AIPAC to somehow dig up my middle school livejournal fanfic account. I prepared my family for it. I’m still amazed it didn’t happen.

I’m rooting for Egypt. Greece and Italy (Rome) didn’t qualify so let’s go ancient civilizations!

I will vote for someone I don’t like but I won’t vote for someone who I wouldn’t feel comfortable being alone in a room with a member of my family. It’s that simple, let’s not pretend it’s complicated

It’s insane that a single vote would be cast to support speech restriction of university professors. I literally can’t think of anything more obviously detrimental to knowledge itself

In better news, John Oliver's three-day stint/stunt as a corporate villain on legendary soap opera "General Hospital" appears to be going... fucking brilliantly?? I have watched this clip on a loop for like 20 mins I really, truly need to see the full episodes NOW

He is killing people. It’s that simple.

Trump guys love pretending it’s politics and not being a shitty racist person that led to them being a Trump guy

A good summary of how broken the democrats are is the fact that Platner is still running. It’s an easy call but so many people would rather wring their hands and come up with reasons for inaction

I'm so disillusioned, I almost don't even care who gets the FIFA Peace Prize next year

Addiction is not funny but it would be kinda funny to be addicted to snuff in 2026

A lot of the most unhinged shit about Taylor swift seems to come from people who say “I’m not a Swiftie, but…”. My brothers and sisters…you are

If you think it’s ok that Taylor Swift selfishly shut down midtown and your defense is that the Knicks games also impact the city…I just don’t know what to do to help you

This is, I believe, the connoisseur's 4th of July dril tweet

Christopher Columbus had some big ol balls being like “yeah I did it, these are Indians since we made it to India. I don’t care that they look different and sound different and the place looks different, it’s a regional thing”

If the forefathers were alive to see what America had become they’d probably say “arrrgh! Fuck! I’ve been dead for hundreds of years and now I’m a living skeleton! It should hurt but all nervous tissue died long ago so at least there is mercy in that!”

It would be very funny if there was a founding father who tried to fit in things in the constitution that would be relevant in 250 years. Like raising his hand and yelling out “and the right to bear arms must not extend to robot slaves!”

I’m sure he just forgot. It’s fine.

DO NOT SHARE SCREENSHOTS OF THE INFOWARS ELF.

He continued, “Fire bad!”

This man was created by Guy Ritchie

I have tears in my eyes with the alt text

The footage

Bosnia AND Herzegovina? Hey hey buster, one country at a time

The problem here isn't trans kids in sports. The problem is that a lot of kids can only afford college if they're the best at sports. That's the actual problem

Democrats really need to find this generic dem who keeps polling better than every actual candidate

I saw Criminal Algae at the warped tour back in 2008

This is the best brand name I’ve seen in a while.

vOTe bLuE nO MaTtER wHO

I found out that the sea drone the Houthis used is called the Blowfish. Come on. Houthis and the Blowfish

OH, PEG --- THAT’S CORNY

I think when I die I want to have a giant wheel to spin at my funeral and everyone who says a nice thing about me gets to spin it and see what they inherit. “Ah, congrats you’ve landed on X-Men cards from the 90’s!”

Mechanic: Yeah, shouldn’t be too bad. Here’s an itemized list of recommended repairs and their cost. Wouldn’t go too much longer on those brake pads either! Me, trying to play hardball, desperate to not be gouged: I think I’ll fuckin…. I’ll kill you?? ah, sorry. never mind sorry.

I hate that he was so good in Marty Supreme. I really wanted to dunk on him because he sucks as a person but I would be lying if I said he didn’t kill it as a corrupt businessman

These leftists must be stopped! They’re continually winning elections, which hurts uh electability! If they keep winning then they’ll lose or something!

They are more afraid of the dsa than anything because it’s the only thing that puts them out of a job. They all get paid the same when they win or lose elections as long as they can continue running.

its crazy how one of the only jobs where you can openly espouse the most disgusting gutter racism on-the-clock is “person who makes laws and is in charge of everything”

The thing I keep going back to is why do these democratic establishment people get a say anymore? They’re the biggest failures and losers in the history of politics and should be unemployed, not making decisions

Everything out of SCOTUS is literally like “6-3 Alito representing the court states racism no longer a bad thing” and we’re just so tired that it isn’t even really news

good morning

the funniest story going right now is that a giraffe has escaped and nobody can find it

I need a video of Mamdani checking his phone, seeing Hakeem Jeffries is calling, and then immediately putting the phone back down.

So much unhappiness in this world is rooted in people being afraid to come to grips with who they are. How many assholes are just assholes because of the anxiety and stress of pretending to be someone they are not?