"Oh no, not my face too!!!" ...says Nigel Farage today

Keir Starmer’s wife this morning packing his angry eyes, just in case

Armageddon is terrible, but our only other option was diversity trainings at work.

🚨BREAKING🚨: TRUMP SAYS HE MUST BE INVOLVED IN SELECTION OF NEXT SPURS MANAGER. THREATENS AIR STRIKES.

What's the gender neutral version of good boy/girl? quick

Was today years old when I found out No Doubt was Gwen Stefani

Got a soft mullet and went football again x

My old man's a thermos He wears a thermostat

Just know I could fucking eat up a 19th century officers uniform

Labour could finish 5th in the coming locals on these numbers

The things one does for love

One like and I buy myself a ticket to go Rotherham away tomorrow as a treat

Lmao

Grindr! At The Clinic

Blocking Burnham gave the Greens the opportunity to hasten their inevitable breakthrough, a first ever by-election victory, weeks in the national spotlight, soon another polling boost and further attention in a way which will net dozens if not hundreds of extra councillors in the coming locals

A much better sell would be: “do u actually want ur elections to be hundred of localized game theories in which the price of coordination failure is electing someone u hate?”

Just took 93yr Mum to vote in Gorton and Denton, she’s registered blind. In a very loud voice she said, “Which box for the Big Tits?” and both Matt Goodwin and Zack Polanski raised their hands. A cheer went up from waiting voters

The polling organisation supposedly criticising Labour for featuring the fake polling organisation is itself a fake polling organisation pointing to the Green Party. It’s all so bloody exhausting.

Oh go on then. @tacticalchoice_ on X is - at best - a parody account. Its web address was registered today and points to the Green Party’s website. And yet its tweet claiming to have been copied for the Labour leaflet has been viewed 200k times, screenshotted countless more bsky.app/profile/anto...

UK party leaders ranked by Most to Least Online: Most Polanski - Name searcher, 3am poster Badenoch - one of the few posters banned from more forums than she's read. Farage - New entrant, didn't like Twitter until it got racist. Davey - Watches instagram reels for new campaign ideas. Starmer

Something something kneeling before christ

FWIW I think the Greens have done enough to win, not entirely through honest or decent means, but that ruthless edge is why they will take it if they do. Pretty grim campaign to watch as an outsider tbh and has moved the needle on what it is and isn't acceptable to do to win.

anyway, I hope Matt Goodwin loses, I hope Labour and the Greens can find a less toxic way to campaign against each other, and I hope Labour MPs come to their senses and reform the electoral system so we don’t have this x650 in three years’ time

London Euston said "fuck off fruit"

Love the glimpse into the beautiful mind that notated this used copy of Moby Dick I got

Entering my whoopsie-daisy, yoo-hoo era

30 quid delay repay on a ticket I'll be expensing, God bless you Avanti you useless fucks

This Green use of Starmer-Modi resembles a leaflet that Labour put out in Batley in 2021 about Boris Johnson + Modi. The party was heavily criticised for that. I think the lesson is not to pitch to voters from one background with messages you can't show + defend to voters of every background.

Plugging again xx www.instagram.com/j_hol95?igsh...

being at the age where everyone you know is having children

Just made the dirtiest sausage and egg barm and I am in absolute heaven

the video game industry is a mess

Made an instragram finally at my big age x www.instagram.com/j_hol95?igsh...

Fascinating - Reform lose to every other option, Lib Dems beat every other option, Greens beat every other option except Lib Dem

Yeahhhhh boiiiiii

Developed a work crush in my new job but I can't tell if he's actually straight or just a little bit autistic

do you have any idea how hard it is to be bisexual? every day i have to call myself gay because it makes the punchline funnier,

Sunday scaries can't get me if its still technically Saturday because I never went to bed

the Palestine Action ban really was a classic Starmer govt move: a hysterical overreaction that won them zero plaudits from the right, cost them badly to the left, and which got shot down in the end anyway.

we live in the ruins of a greater civilization

Drugs in US politics, a potted history: Bill Clinton, 1992: "I did not inhale" Barack Obama, 2006: "I did inhale, that was the point" RFK Jr., 2026:

[bravely] are we still allowed to call it cock milking

I have today been informed that, despite personal assurances to the contrary, the Green party have once again used my image and misrepresented my words on a second leaflet circulated in Gorton and Denton ahead of the by-election. I have now lodged an official complaint with the returning officer.

Icon

Starmer defining himself against corbyn and boris and becoming both corbyn and boris....absolute cinema. Wish it didn't affect me

I do think that the Anas Sarwar press conference was just too nakedly cynical to be effective, frankly.