Congratulations you fucking morons

A plane has struck the second tower.

Wait a minute, charges?!

I’d settle for a side hug and a cool 15 mil

*record scratch*

GOT THE OIL.

"Cheating is a vibe." - this guy

AYO

My recap just popped up….

*looks up at profile header*

What are we doing here folks

this really isn’t an exaggeration

CP3 deserved better than this

Time is money so time

Good morning to Brazilian reporter Manuela Borges, who’s been waiting eleven years for this petty moment. ❤️ 🇧🇷

This gives me the warm and fuzzies for some reason.

😬 Yeah, but...

Confession: I would love to get in on the Ja Rule jokes... but I hated his music, so if it aint one of the radio joints, I don't know it.

Gobble.

An amazing new Trump controversy, Part II of II: - Saturday afternoon: Trump says he spoke to Bolsonaro the night before and planned to see him “in the very near future” - Monday afternoon: The Trump White House isn’t sure whether Trump actually had the conversation he referenced two days earlier

An amazing new Trump controversy, Part I of II: - Friday night: Jair Bolsonaro’s son summons a crowd to their family home - Later Friday night: Bolsonaro takes a soldering iron to his ankle bracelet days before starting a lengthy prison - Saturday morning: Bolsonaro is re-arrested

Happy 85th Birthday to the legendary, Joe Gibbs 🎂🎉🥳❤️💛 #HAIL

I too, tell dad jokes because I'm a dad. The daddier, the better.

Imagine that

"We keep saying the stove is hot and we keep touching the stove." Thanks, Ayo.

Correction: THIS is now the meme for the new millennium.

It's gotta be tough to be the president, just crisis after crisis. Must be hard to prioritize... so, I'm personally glad that this p-

What we tell yall? Stay out that store

You’ve been kidnapped. The characters from the last TV show you watched are trying to rescue you. Who’s coming to save you?

Get in, losers, we're doing the thing again.

Be Gone.

Right out of the Bush Cheney playbook.

Time to shelve this one, we have a meme for the new millennium.

*looks around* Yeah, y'all get to talk now. We'll see come Saturday.

Don't know if it's a pro tip or not but my favorite character to send on missions in #Dispatch is Prism... leveling her up will increase your chances.

"Why...he...do my daddy like that?!?!"

These people need to remember why Sen. Kelly entered politics in the first place. He isn’t backing down from anyone.

"I got this backup listener thing I was sposed to do, so..." - Ted

Duff:

Suns got some real G's holding it down right now.

Didn't know that I needed a go-go version of "The Right Kind of Lover" until today. Patti went from heels to barefoot to flats in the span of two songs. Incredible stuff here. An entire living legend.

"That's a nice country you have there... be a shame if something happened to it."

NOPE..................... And this isn't even the start.

Russian whistleblowers reveal what it was like to work for a troll farm and spread anti-American & anti-Ukrainian propaganda lies on social media There are literally thousands of these guys, and you have interacted with them, without realizing it. worldwar3.substack.com/p/russian-wh...

RIP Jimmy Cliff.