If I could make a horror movie it would be about a scraggly group of ordinary suburbanites being steadily picked off in the night by an enraged and hateful moose

A story in three parts

I’m RUDE!

lol

I can tell I haven't a Scandinavian bone in my body because I cannot for the life of me understand why anyone would willingly enter a sauna

Legit can’t understand why Taco Bell keeps removing the edible stuff from their menu in favor of trying to sell me a bunch of soggy snack foods glued together by cheese

Straight-up I have an "Aunt Sue" who has zero familial relationship but that's what we all call her

If you’re ever on a boat during a storm, be sure to row right for a massive wave. Yes, you’ll capsize, but don’t worry! Instead of drowning face-down in sea water while unconscious, you’ll wash harmlessly up on a nearby seashore.

If you’re ever on a boat during a storm, be sure to row right for a massive wave. Yes, you’ll capsize, but don’t worry! Instead of drowning face-down in sea water while unconscious, you’ll wash harmlessly up on a nearby seashore.

You mean the slavers we defeated? Maybe you want a statue of Benedict Arnold too.

Could not stop laughing at this

Do it, cowards.

No Kings protest on Berkeley campus rn.

It’s time to take this movement global. Let’s march on Buckingham Palace

She sounds like a butter noodles kid

Look. Look at what my friends got me from the Cyanide and Happiness folks at Comic-Con

For Tolkien fans, a timely passage for No Kings Eve, from WH Auden’s review of Lord of the Rings.

What's up with the new compression on YouTube shorts making everything look AI-generated? Is it so that we get less good at noticing when something is legit AI-generated?

There is an actual life-changing conflict between WFH being cheaper and more efficient, an entire layer of middle managers who need to have meetings to feel alive, and the commercial real estate cabal that runs all cities. It’s going to get so fucking weird.

Thank you all so much for sharing and signing. The bill was signed today!

Nothing is less rock and roll than teenagers dressing in ways that shock and offend middle-aged assholes

I’m starting to learn the proper throwing motion. It’s not intuitive!

“It’s public transportation, Michael, how much could it cost, $20?” — @lazarusrat.net

the Lord is my shepherd, He shaves my entire body to make sweaters

Perennial

For real tho we got like Mike Johnson, Lindsey Graham, what is up with the South producing so many weak, subservient men who are happy to prop up bullies who tell them how to think and what to say

Please do not pirate books, you're harming artists, not corporations

Obligatory Jenny Nicholson Tweet

I have to congratulate the BlueSky moderation team for implementing technology that prevents us from ever accidentally seeing anything that maybe looks like a butt, you know that horribly lurid bit of genitalia they can show in a PG-13 movie

I really want to thank you all so much. You helped out me and my husband more than you can know, and I am so, so grateful. www.gofundme.com/f/he-kicked-...

chng.it/VPHW889jwh My coworker’s son was shot to death by police in the middle of the street. He was unarmed but he was black. She’s asked me to share this petition.

OPENAI LAWYER: so how does this sound. 'user x' pays us $3 to generate a video of elsa suffocating him with her ass. from that, you will receive a princely 50¢ DISNEY LAWYER: i am going to shoot you with a gun

Oooh, I'm genetically wired to basically go blind from macular degeneration in my later years, I wonder if this treatment could prevent that

normal person: i just want a place to hang out with my friends tech weirdo: and shitheads np: no just my friends tw: but what about hearing alternative views on race and gender? np: we just want to hang out and goof around tw: so where do the shitheads fit in then np: no shitheads tw: not following

Dragons can fly, geez Lisa, read a book sometime! I pick up books like you pick up beers. Then you have a SERIOUS reading problem!

cw: nsfw furry art

Catching practice went really well yesterday! It's wild to be able to do things that three weeks ago seemed impossible to me! I'm so amped. I've never trained for something like this and been able to see improvement before! First coaching lesson tonight!

Oh no! We forgot to learn from history

Lesson today cancelled

Nobody asked for it. We did it anyway. If you ever used Winamp during the later years, it had an awesome, awesome visualizer called Milkdrop. The Webamp people implemented a workalike called Butterchurn. Internet Archive now supports Webamp and Butterchurn. Just click on the llama!

Them: Enjoy being a beginner! Beginning is the time when your skills will increase the fastest! Me, looking at my rate of improvement: uh-oh

We need a bigger tent, that’s why we must betray and expel the following types of people:

i don't mean to single out baseball fans here, because you see this in lots of fan communities, but in certain corners people talk as though baseball is real. they think all the players are real people and the stadiums are places you can actually visit. to each their own, but that cannot be healthy

I'm supposed to have my first baseball lesson this week but the coach hasn't gotten back to me yet. I'm a little anxious about that. I've been training on my own as much as I can. My skills aren't solid enough for me to get much benefit at the batting cages, so I've been doing tee work in the park.

Celebrating 17 years with my husbunny today. It’s hard to believe. It doesn’t feel that long at all. Here’s to another 17, @jakebe.bsky.social

Well don't I feel stupid

One way DS9 has really not aged well is Miles and Bashir always going off to the Holosuites to fight in the Alamo Like damn I didn’t know you felt so strongly about Mexicans not letting you own slaves