I wish computers didn't need me to explain to them that when I say I want to listen to Olivia Rodrigo, I mean post-Disney Olivia Rodrigo. Nothing kills a vibe like chasing "All-American Bitch" with "Breaking Free."

*clears throat* *spritzes with mist* Mimimimimi *taps mic* *deep breath* JUST STOP CLICKING ON THE DUMB THINGS OUT-OF-TOUCH PEOPLE WRITE FOR OUT-OF-TOUCH PUBLICATIONS

Today my friend finally legally extracted herself from her marriage, and when I yelled at Seth in the other room that the divorce had gone through he shouted back "I only got laid off four days ago!" and I am begging someone to employ this man before the jokes get any worse

(Cries in Kid Whose Mom Was Anti-Single-Use-Plastic In The Eighties Before It Was Trendy)

one thing I have come to believe, as someone who grew up deeply skeptical of the "authentic expression / sold out" dichotomy is that however true or false it was objectively, the taboo on "selling out" was societally load-bearing

FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER. Fun fact: The majority of American drivers are women. This is why we're mad all the time.

Massive shoutout out to whoever handles the Royal Canadian Air Force’s social media account. They responded to every single comment on their already very solid Trans Day of Remembrance post and they responded like this…

Hey young parents pro tip if you want a second child but don't have it in the budget, you can replicate the experience by setting alarms on every device in your house to go off at random times of day and night to broadcast Minecraft facts that you can't turn off until you react to their satisfaction

Literally Roblox could fix 99% of their problem by simply adding a setting that allows users to chat ONLY WITH THEIR APPROVED FRIENDS. This is such a simple, no-brainer fix, and they keep "improving online safety" by coming up with more and more complicated ways to NOT do this very simple fix.

When you’ve had the kind of week that calls for breakfast cake and your coffee buddy understands the assignment (and knows where the good Puerto Rican coffee shops are) Cc @mamineedscafe.bsky.social

a world without trans people has never existed and never will

Note for Democratic politicians: you don't have to start your condemnations of ICE raids with "We all want to catch violent criminals, but..." Just say "These raids have nothing to do with catching criminals and everything to do with terrorizing innocent minority groups."

Excuse me what

I don't know if you guys know much about the law but in my experience this is not a thing you want the judge to have said about you

This was a Utah university attempting to comply with the indefensible HB 261. A university. Prohibiting lists of words and ideas.

Kenai Peninsula gets buses! #Alaska

It's almost Thanksgiving! Got an ICE member coming for dinner at your house? No you don't! Can't stop them because you're not the one hosting? No problem. You can shun them, mock them, shame them, cough in their food. They get the weird chair. No weird chair? Make a weird chair.

Big thumbs up emoji* to my husband's (former) employer. *That's a Gen Z thumbs up emoji, not a Millennial thumbs up emoji. Ask your nieces and nephews.

"The Coast Guard will no longer classify the swastika as a hate symbol. "Instead, the Coast Guard will classify the Nazi insignia as 'potentially divisive' under its new guidelines. "The new policy similarly downgrades the definition of nooses and the Confederate flag." Free link wapo.st/3Mbd9a6

ICYMI, Grok is now claiming Zyklon B was used as a disinfectant. Please leave the bird site. Today is the day. You can do it.

My new favorite kind of meme is "here are detailed instructions on how to turn off AI". 🔨

@brookebikesmke.bsky.social you'll enjoy* this one *by "enjoy" I mean "find cathartic in a dark way while bemoaning the state of humanity"

this-is-fine.png

Paul Giamatti when they told him who'd be playing Abigail this time around

Healthy normal #marriagegoals

Me, to my 17 year old son: Want to know a foolproof way to ensure your name in never included in the release of government files on sex trafficking? Son: What? Me: Don't engage in sex trafficking. Son: Ok. Follow me for more parenting advice.

"Look, things happen. And what happens at Camp Crystal Lake should stay at Camp Crystal Lake. We can’t hold everyone accountable for every little thing they’ve ever done."

Just told my nine-year-old that farts don't actually look like green smoke. Can I ruin anyone else's night?

Happy Native American Heritage Month! There are currently no shows with Native leads that have Native showrunners!

Answer: 1. Set up a hardcam 2. Livestream 24/7 3. Run a best-guess pool on the date and time of collapse (call it the First Annual Beagle-Tree Classic) 4. Profit

A former volunteer at MKE Urban Stables has been dismissed from her duties after telling suspected ICE agents to leave the property. More: https://www.tmj4.com/about-us/lighthouse/you-cant-be-here-volunteer-dismissed-from-duties-after-confronting-suspected-ice-agents-at-mke-non-profit

I mean, look, I'm not a reporter, so who am I to talk? But on a day where the president both just called a woman reporter "Piggy" and is celebrating someone who had people bone saw apart one of my colleagues, I might just be a little ready to defend my colleagues and profession. But that's just me

LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOO

In even slightly normaler times, you'd see a post like this and not have to look at what they were reposting to know *which* of that day's above the fold, all caps behaviors they were referencing

It's hard to describe how disorienting it is to see this many students absent. My only mental reference point is the weeks leading up to school getting canceled due to COVID-19, when students were starting to stay home due to illness or out of precaution. CBP/ICE is a plague.

**Weeps in silent appreciation for the professionals who choose to spend time around children in these difficult times**

Saudi Arabia famously has never been involved in any inappropriate conduct against the United States involving misuse of aircraft

To Kat's point, I have always said that the easiest thing to do in the face of reports of gendered violence is nothing. People desperately want to do nothing. And pushing them to do literally anything is seen as an attack.

It has always been so obvious that the backlash to MeToo isn’t about whether the abuse is happening but whether people are allowed to want it to stop

NEW: Epstein survivors release the most powerful PSA I have ever seen. Make this go viral so every member of the House of Representatives sees it.

My villain origin story is spending several years trying to figure out how to make an independent news organization profitable and watching people comment “I’m allergic to paywalls,” “I use adblockers” and “sponsored content sucks” while claiming to support local news

If someone believes people should be paid a fair and living wage for their work, but that doesn't extend to people who create or curate entertaining or informational content for some reason, that's a huge cognitive distortion that needs to be addressed.

'Four cones wins, but in order to get a cone you have to build a civilization. Which is where the spirit cards come in'

I was the editor of a Catholic newspaper for a very brief period that overlapped with the theatrical release of "The DaVinci Code" and during that time I received no fewer than two dozen panicked press releases from Bill Donohue. About a Tom Hanks movie.

When you’re using the number of months talking about the age of someone you had sex with things are going really well for you

Ruby Bridges is still alive. She's younger than my mom.

ICE vs the clergy

From this minister's op-ed: "People wanting to experience God are more likely to meet the Divine trying to shut down the Broadview, Illinois, ICE facility than we ever were in church...God does not live in our houses of worship, but...with those who are bearing the brunt of cruelty in this moment."

This is a statement I received from a Epstein survivor who is a Jane Doe. Share it widely.

I say this as the person who used to edit Alaska's most notorious and polarizing outdoors columnist, whose pieces were always too wordy, excessively antagonistic, and unnecessarily controversial — but I used to hit "publish" and then just sit back and watch the analytics sail through the roof.