*puts Chargers jersey on, wipes weed ash under my eyes l f g

I. Found my thrill. On Charcuterie Hill

Ain’t no humor like Sisyphean humor… Sisyphean humor don’t stop… (Seriously, it doesn’t, he’s on that hill for eternity)

dildionnaire

Got some tuna water in an open cut, I bet I wake up with an incredibly shitty super power.

I am Gee Gordon Pretty and I endorse this skeet

Share a TV series from the 1960s you love The Prisoner 1967

on facebook everyone is fighting a battle they won’t fucking shut up about

Going to be a pioneer in journalism by innovating the opinion baseboard. Editorials running parallel to the floor unlike the uppity columns expressing themselves perpendicularly

Regular reminder that Axios stories saying Dems are about to cave are likely sourced from GOP staffers trying to make it happen. Doesn't mean it definitely won't happen. But it's like those NYT stories that Harvard is considering caving (they haven't). The anonymous source was trying to manifest it.

Getting old is so extra. I used to just wake and bake but now I wake and ache and bake.

i was a regifted child

I like my coffee like I like my men, bitter and with a slightly unpleasant mouth feel

I've deleted more replies than you've replied, punk.

Every time I block a news organization I get a tingle in my no-no place

schrödinger’s pussy

FUCK Poundtown 😤😤 I wanna take him to Burlington Throat Factory

Why is the G silent in sign and signage but not in signature?

This life crisis is mid

Have Billy Strings and Alicia Keys teamed up yet? If not, they should. I mean, obviously.

broccoli flourets are the flavor sponges of stirfry

" Welcome to Target, I love you. "

‘We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold.’

YOU WILL NOT ESCAPE US. Telepathic #Caturday

Close my eyes, she's somehow closer now Softly smile, I know she must be kind When I look in her eyes She goes with me to a blossom world

I can’t believe it’s not butthole

on pornhub it’s called kentucky freud chicken

when will a frankenstein movie be brave enough to let us see the doctor choosing the dick

Desperate clams call them pick-me pearls

My panic room is a sublet

Propaganda-pissing "the blue party is at fault for everything" troll you might want to block, or mock, or whatever moves you.

Forget Mariah Carey…begin the thawing of Burl Ives! This beautiful man’s buttery vocals are the real sound of Christmas and brother might take a while.

my grandpa is a Bluesky cop so I can say whatever I want

not many know this but "christmas" means "more christ" in spanish

Clergy launched aloft by a catapult call them an Air Friar

For DAY 309 of my year long retrospective on made for TV movies that need a DVD/Blu Ray release, I chose Thursday's Game (1974). Bob Newhart and Gene Wilder explore the city of New York and examine their lives when their poker game is cancelled but the men still want a free night away from home

lookie loos

meningitis

The first rule of Hamburger Club is : Don't Help ! The second rule is : You ARE NOT A HAMBURGER HELPER!

She wreck on my Edmund til I Fitzgerald

Oldielocks

Don't be a square, Daddy-O Get round and become a Sir-cle

I write songs about sewing machines. I'm a Singer songwriter.

Gary is short for " Garold "

There are so many hot ladies at this plasma donation center

Oldielocks

if the sandwich hit you must acquit