laziest fucking writers room in history

SICK Democrats want to paint a tunnel onto a cliffside and let POTUS run right into it, collapsing his body like an ACCORDION.

wedding sneak peek :)

PSA: if you use an LLM to do your writing, no you didn’t BECAUSE IT IS NOT YOUR WRITING!! YOU ARE NOT A WRITER. You extruded some text from the plagiarism machine. YOU ARE A PLAGIARIST. YOU WILL NEVER BE A WRITER BY STEALING OTHERS’ WORDS.

I am thrilled our education system is totally dependent on monopoly platforms like Canvas which along with using AI to surveil all my IP & my students data are really easy to hack thanks to AI. Let's double down on technology & praise our tech overlords for delivering us this shattered world.

With Canvas down and a lot of semesters otherwise ending, there's a strong danger of anyone becoming a Main Character on academic Bluesky.

I JUST remembered watching this in one of my junior high classes, and I’m glad to see others in the comments had the same idea to revisit it in 2026.

i think i’ll go dig a hole in my backyard and move into it

spending more money to rent my graduation regalia than i will to buy my wedding dress.

man, what the hell.

Someone on TikTok said if the Bears win the Super Bowl, then "it'll somehow reset the fucking portal that we entered" when the Cubs won the World Series in 2016. Sold! www.jezebel.com/ive-heard-a-...

Same energy.

i cannot wait until the AI bubble just aggressively explodes man

Completely obsessed with this car I saw on LSD the other day. Absolute small business icon.

I’m sorry, but it is disgraceful to be an academic who uses this technology to conduct research. It should be prohibited in all of our scholarly institutions, including universities and journals.

me, leaving for my train: i consent. my suitcase, packed for my trip: i consent. lucy, wailing in front of said suitcase at the door: I DON’T! ISN’T THERE SOMEONE YOU FORGOT TO ASK?

Savage in the best McSweeney’s tradition. If this damn cartoon means a lot to you (as it does me), please check this out

DOCTORATE ACQUIRED ✅

Feeling the exact mix of emotions one feels the morning of their dissertation defense.

uniquely hellish experience to have no voice on your last day of class while also flinching at any phone call or text that you get in case it’s about to confirm that your Papa, who raised you, has died. oh, and it’s ten degrees, and i’m here until 6:15.

“AI is clearly sticking around so you have to get used to it” wrong. I don’t have to get used to shit. I am a practiced hater and I can keep this going for decades if I am required to

Suggestions for comfort activities/media/food/etc when preemptively mourning?

Is there an untranslatable German word for “the feeling of losing a grandparent who is functionally your parent, and most people don’t quite understand your grief, but you would feel like a jackass if you tried to tell someone who has lost a parent that you understand their grief?”

It’s listserv-official!

Welcome to your neighborhood gay bar. We’re playing Slayyyter at 30 decibels above the recommended safe level while a loop of Norma Desmond scenes play on mute on our TVs. Here’s your vodka cranberry that’s 85% vodka, 15% cranberry. That’ll be $5.

Dream on, Sluggo

Almost a year now since I received this absolutely classic burn from the Canadian government.

We don’t need to reform ICE. We don’t need alternatives to ICE. We don’t need to engage in dishonest debates wondering what the U.S. would do without ICE. ICE isn’t even 23 years old. Most adults know a world without ICE. And the billions used to fund ICE can be used to meet people’s basic needs.

me waking up and opening this app

Portrait of a woman who is finally on the week-long break that she’s needed since September.

who is friar laurence in this scenario

Grad school will get you crying over "What's Up?" at 2 PM on a Wednesday, because oh my GOD do I try all the time in this institution.

i like that the modern house cat, in defiance of the survival instincts of its quiet, graceful ancestors, can now go down the stairs like a gaggle of children in combat boots playing a set of drums

ask your doctor if lying down in the forest to be consumed by the earth is right for you

This week I got the two best compliments I could ever receive: 1) "You can historicize like a motherfucker," and 2) "Usually when I see someone's list of favorite films, I feel like I know them on a deeper level. When I see your list of favorite films, I feel lost and confused."

some people in the news business really didn't get an early enough exposure to semiotext(e)

Me recommending Mona Awad's "Bunny" to friends: It made me have vivid emotional flashbacks to PhD coursework and sickened me to my core. I had to take it one chapter a day because I felt the plot too deeply. It's one of my favorite books of all time, 10/10, perfect piece of art.

Never thought I’d complain about being well-rested at 6 AM, but I fear for my 5 PM class if I can’t get in a bit more sleep.

2025 symbolism department putting in extra extra overtime

This is the first weekend in YEARS that I'm not working on my dissertation in some capacity. I hardly know what to do with myself.

Bill Clinton's dick is the lament configuration that has cursed american politics for the entirety of my lifetime

save me juicy peach flavor alani. juicy peach flavor alani please save me.

No such thing as a mental health walk with all these wasps

IT IS OCTOBER TOMORROW. ENOUGH WITH THE 90 DEGREE WEATHER. ENOUGH!!!

Another one of those small things where you really see how far the country has swung culturally and politically since 2016.

absolutely devastated that it will be in the 90 degree range this weekend. terrible terrible terrible.

Cuomo: Yes, I can make a second giant city hate me. I can do this.

one of the single best deals in streaming. i've been paying for PBS Passport for years. it rules

the speakers on my new monitor are bonkers powerful. better than the (very nice!) bluetooth speaker we have. i am using this newfound power like any reasonably person would: by listening to kylie minogue and towa tei's extremely underrated "german bold italic" at full volume youtu.be/TPwyvZa0AZk?...

My 8th book, Taco, is an object in the world! I received the first theee copies out of the printer ahead of its October pub date. I pulled out a shirt I had for the occasion. I am very grateful to Bloomsbury, to Ian Bogost and Chris Schaberg and to all who ate tacos and invited me to read!