A movie you’ve seen more than 7 times with a gif

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I will still move to Canada but I will not wear a blue jays hat

FUCK OFF

How are you gonna load up bases, in the bottom of the 9th, with one out, in game 7 of the World Series, and get nothing

Bruh

Alan Wake 2

My name’s Jef

My name is Allen Wallen and I write word

My name is Alan Wake, and I ate my agent, Barry.

My name is Alan Wake, and…I don’t feel so good.

My name is Alan Wake, and I can’t remember how Twin Peaks ended.

My name is Alan Wake. I’m a jerk, and everyone loves me. Except my wife.

My name is Alan Wake, and I’ve been missing for 13 years, which is why my hair is 3 inches longer.

My name is Alex Casey, and I’m not gonna make it. I take one last shot of cheap whiskey. It creeps into the bog of my stomach acid, to separate the surface moss of moldy painkillers and too much chili crisp. Like Moses parting the Red Sea. I’m fucked. Drunk. Bleeding like an out of luck, stuck, pig.

My name is Alan Wake, and I’m about to Katamari roll every Deus Ex Machina within a 10-mile radius.

My name is Alan Wake, and let me tell you: writing women is harder than it looks.

My name is Alan Wake, and I don’t actually drink coffee but don’t tell anyone heehee

My name is Alan Wake, and I’m terrified of manual labor.

My name is Alan Wake, and I’m pissed I didn’t write Control.

My name is Alan Wake, and I hate it when my wife calls me on my ridiculous bullshit. The migraine she gives me blurs my vision, like an overlong sentence confusing simile with metaphor; filling the page like I’m desperate to hit that word count, desperate to quiet my bitch of a w—uh, uh, editor.

My name is Alan Wake, and my mouth is agape.

My name is Alan Wake. [borat voice] My wife!

My name is Alan Wake, and I’m a tweed quilt of clichés kept original and exciting via Finnish witchcraft

My name is Alan Wake, and I wanna fuck Alex Casey so bad you have no idea

My name is Alan Wake, and I’m covered in ticks.

My name is Alan Wake. I went to the pnw once and made it my Whole Thing.

I’m Alan Wake, and this dude is about to die in gruesome fashion. This story is craaazy who did that? Who wrote that??

My name is Alan Wake, and I’m so sweaty

My name is Alan Wake, and I’ve been hoisted by my own petard 43 times. I know it won’t happen again. I just have to keep going.

My name is Alan Wake, and I’m so successful it suuuuucks

My name is Alan Wake, and I wrote a story in which I slammed my dick in a car door. I woke up from the nightmare of writing this tale, and took a shockingly flat piss.

They are also intentionally conflating machine-learning and generative AI slop to confuse and try to make GenAI seem necessary. Google Maps traffic stuff is machine learning, not GenAI, for example. Auto-correct is too. Don't let them make you lose the thread. GenAI slop is slop.

Confusing Furikake for Bukkake is apparently an “unforgivable mistake” #smurfeesKitchenTips

i can't believe they have to play again today.

This should actually count as two wins if it ever ends

I predict Shohei’s arm will fall off

Edging home runs like a motherfucker

turning a big dial that says "innings" on it and constantly looking back at the audience for approval like a contestant on the price is right

Out of all the things that could recreate the manic energy of following Blaseball almost entirely through Internet Posts, I was not expecting actual baseball.

Walking Shohei in the 15th is disrespectful to anyone who is up past their bedtime

biblically accurate pitch count

Slap this game on a blu ray and sell it as part of the criterion collection

I’m watching the World Series. I’m taking part o the Stanford prison experiment. I’m at the combination World Series/Stanford prison experiment

oh my god, The Tweet is exactly ten years old tonight

Baseball sucks, actually

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Wrote about how there's little stopping you from playing the classic shooter Vanquish at this very moment for @aftermath.site aftermath.site/vanquish-pla...